Ramblings of a Villain

Altruism

Have you ever noticed that when you slap 'true' as a prefix to anything, you give it another layer of complexity, another layer of power?

Think about it.

If you are talking to justice, it's not the same to be talking about true justice. You don't just want what is right - you want a perfected form of it, a solution that will see all evils repaid one by one. You don't want love, you want true love. You don't want aultrism, you want true altruism.

Perfect, divine, unattainable.

You imbecile.

Sorry. I am... sorry.

If I seem tense or prone to anger, it's because I've been down here before, spinning these same wheels. It's because it annoys me so that it is so easy to brush off any sense of mysticism and purpose in this world by simply adding a simple four-letter word before it. Do you realize what you are doing, covering yourself in your safety blanket, in your shell of security, because it is easier to make your stand in what you think is right, than to admit of wrongdoing? Because it is easier than to admit that you might not be a good person?

There's nothing 'true' in this world. We live in a realm of greys, of approximations and unquantifiable data that cannot be visually charted for quick reference. The realm of absolutes is limited to fiction, fantasy and mathematics.

I know that seeing it from where you are sitting know, I must sound malign to you. Derranged, dangerous. I don't think I am - despite the fact that I have to share this world with you, with you humans, despite the fact that I know - I know! - what you do to each other, the degrees of true cruelty that you can achieve... I also know the surprising true benelovence that you are capable of.

See what I did there? Only opposites can zero-sum when talking of absolutes.

Cynicism comes naturally to many in this day and age. Turn any news channel, look at the state of the world, and all the magic and wonder of your life will dry like sad, pastel-coloured paint. Even if you stay off the net, it will happen to you.

You will be hurt. You will be betrayed. You will be disappointed. Humans are... troublesome creatures, complicated, full of little glitches and unpredictable actions that will work against themselves, against you.

So when you are hurt, the natural reaction is to hurt in turn. Eye for eye, true justice reigns supreme. Pay with the same coin, cut with the same blade. It is fair, yes.

And it is weak.

You, you glorious galaxy-brain meme, you go bananas at the slightest threat, pulverize, and seek context later.

You. Are. Weak.

Tell me, have you ever done some 'true aultrism' yourself?

No, of course not. So what's the next best thing?

What have you done, what have you given, what have you sacrificed?

Because that is altruism. Sacrifice. And do not make the confusion that many make. Generosity is not altruism; the generous give what they can spare. The altruist give what they need.

Sit on it for a moment. Do you know hunger? Biting hunger that gnaws at your entrails and makes you churn inside? The hunger that weakens your limbs, that has you curling into a ball clutching your stomach, smacking your lips thinking on anything, anything that could sustain you?

Can you imagine yourself being bestowed with the most magnificent loaf of hot bread... and then having to decide whether to keep it for yourself, sharing it with another, giving it away entirely?

You start thinking of context. Are they known to you? Who are they, friend, family? Mother? Child? Sibling? Perhaps their survival is more important, perhaps they have a role to play at large.

Perhaps you feel guilt for your predicament, and this is your penance.

Perhaps you think you do not deserve it.

Perhaps you think it is for the greater good.

Here's what I hate about true altruism.

It implies there's no context. That you would pay any price for the wellbeing of another, with no apparent reward or due recompense for your actions.

No. Human. Lives. In. A. Vacuum. Get that into your head.

You are your society. You are your family. What you do for your kin, you do for yourself. The preservation of the larger body that contains you is the preservation of your kind. Paint it however you will, paint it as duty, paint it as filling a sentimental need, paint it as putting your values over your own interests - it is altruism, and it is, just like hatred, one of the necessary tools of continuity.

We see it all the time in biology. Cellular altruism maintains the larger organism; they need to be replaced and replenished constantly. The refusal of a cell to perform altruistically - to be terminated as the process mandates - leads to a cancerous growth. What we see in this level, we can see to all levels of existence.

You can make a fuss of awareness and conscious life, of free will and destiny and all your coping mechanisms to think you have a larger meaning in this world.

In time, you too will learn altruism, as I have.