TWO

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Rues overdose really scared Monet, but it didn't scare her straight. She still used drugs to cope, however now that Rue's overdose was the talk of the town her brother knew about her problem.

As expected he was doing everything in his power to stop his sister, everything but rehab cause there was no way they could afford it. He didn't want his sister around Rue anymore, but he knew that was never going to happen. Rue was like his other little sister even he would feel lost without her it didn't matter how angry he was at her.

He had just found some pills Monet had hid and flushed them down the toilet. Mo always thought her hiding spots were clever until her brother who knew her like the back of his hand knew what she was hiding, "Do you just want to die? Is that it? Or is it you want to be just like momma? Cause it's starting to get really hard to see the difference."

Her brother was the only person who made her want to stop, she hated how broken it's made him ever since he found out. She's selfish and all she could do is hate it, but the feeling only makes her feel like she needs the drugs more.

"Don't." Was all that she could get out. She usually never said anything back to him when he went on one of his rants about how she's ruining her life. This time around his words cut deep. He didn't know how he got so caught up in his own life to where he didn't notice his own sister becoming addicted to the things he hated the most. He wishes he could go back in time and just save her from herself.

"Monet honestly. Not to be this fucking person, but what about me? You're my only family I got you die off this shit and that's just it for me. If not for you Mo, please for me." He pleaded with his sister for the first time, he never did before because he knew her getting clean was something she had to want on her own, but he was at his breaking point.

She looked at her brothers pleading eyes debating on what to say, she really didn't want to lie to him. Before the drugs she never did.

"Zay I could try." She started, "Like really try. But that's all I could promise to you without lying." She admitted, a tear falling down her cheek. She hated knowing exactly what he was feeling and hated how she was the cause of it even more. How come she couldn't just snap her fingers and become better? Is this what her mom felt about them?

"Dad and momma fucked me up." She said it fast trying to stop her voice from breaking. Her mom was an addict who just came in and out of their life, who would stay clean just long enough to hope for a better life just to find a new boyfriend to throw her life away too. But her dad he was never there, even when she had tried to find him all he had to say to her was stop not even an ounce of sympathy in his eyes. That was the day she decided to stop believing in sort of fairytales or love. She never brought it up to her brother it just felt too embarrassing to say someone who was supposed to love them just didn't.

His eyes grew softer at the mention of both their parents pulling his sister into his embrace, "I know."

She closed her eyes feeling safe in his arms, "They fucked us both up." He whispered. He was the big brother, but he wasn't much older. They were twins after all. Their childhood hurt the both of them deeply, he just stopped crying about it a long time ago just out of pure exhaustion of letting his hurt control his life.

She stood there in her brothers comfort it's all she ever needed in her life, she was thankful for all the times he's protected her when she knew deep down he was scared too. It's why she would always acknowledge her brother as the person she looked up to the most, "You aren't momma Mo. I'm sorry for saying that."

And even when she was wrong he always found a way to make her right, "I'm serious she wouldn't have even tried. I'm proud of you Nene."

She just hopes Rue will try too. Because she needed her, someone who could understand how hard it is to really stop. She didn't know what mindset Rue was going to come out with, but she also didn't know if she wanted support or a devil on her shoulder. For the sake of her brother she hoped Rue was the stronger one out of the two.

IVORYS NOTES.
i hate being in my mind too long 🧍‍♀️
so updates for a distraction MWUAH!!

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