north//spencer reid

chapter twenty five

genre: angst
pairing: season 13 spencer reid x oc
warning: drugs, restraints, hallucinations, childhood abuse, murder, implied sexual assault
summary: amelia discovers what lies ahead of her.
word count: 3.3k

AMELIA

I can't remember the last time my body hurt this badly. I think the last time I felt this level of pain was when I got into a car accident in college and got a concussion, but even still, the pain I'm feeling now is so much worse than that. I can't even move at all and every time I try, I'm held back.

I try to lift my arm but it's stuck in its spot. I try to move the other, but the same thing happens. I start to panic now, tugging on my arms as hard as I can to try and free them of the binds they're confined to. I open my mouth to scream for help but I quickly realize there's a mask over my face, dispelling a white gas with that familiar bubblegum scent that clouds my vision.

A cold sweat pours over my body and I start pulling at my restraints as hard as I can, not even able to see whatever might be in front of me. Where am I? Why am I tied down? Why is my head pounding? Why am I in so much pain? Where is Spencer? I know I'm not home. I want to go home. I want to get out of wherever I am. I want my boyfriend. I want to go home.

The more I kick and pull, the faster I lose my energy. My adrenaline is failing me and it feels like sleep is pulling me in, but I do everything I can to fight it. Every time my eyes close, I jerk my eyelids back open and keep trying to reach for the mask over my face. The only sound I can force out is a pitiful whimper, my efforts at trying to free myself getting more and more useless.

"Amelia?"

The word sounds so far away and it sounds so distorted that I doubt what was spoken was my name. I take in a long breath and the mysterious gas fills my lungs. It stings my chest and floods my senses, and as soon as I breathe it in, it makes my head dizzy.

Every bit of strength I have in my body floats away and it feels as though I become completely paralyzed. I will my limbs to keep pulling at my restraints and get free, but I just can't. I won't. My body won't let me.

"Amelia!"

Another cry escapes my lips but that is all I can force out. My eyes start to roll back. My body feels impossibly light. Lighter than air. The gas I'm breathing in is sweet. It smells good and it tastes good. I want more. As much as I want to keep pulling at the restraints, I let myself give in and just breathe in the white gas in front of my face.

My whole body jerks as I feel some sort of contact on my leg. A hand, maybe? There are some words spoken but I can't tell exactly what they are. Everything is distorted in my ears. It sounds like I'm underwater. Am I underwater? Am I drowning?

The mask slowly starts to slide away, leaving a puff of smoke in its wake. I try to speak yet again, but the only thing I can put together is incoherent mumbles. The sweet gas is gone but I find myself chasing the taste, arching my back to reach the mask.

But then a figure comes into my view, looming over me and pressing their fingertips into my cheeks. I focus my tiny amount of energy on trying to distinguish the identity of the figure in front of me, but it just looks like a black blob. I've gone from staring at a white cloud to a black blob.

"Amelia."

My body jerks as the figure swerves in front of me, a face coming far too close to mine. My name echoes from their lips a few times and I have to will my eyes to focus in order to determine just who is this close to me.

My face softens and tears start to well up in my eyes. His hair looks longer and his beard is more grown out. It looks scraggly, just like when he got out of prison. His eyes look completely dull. There's no beautiful sparkle in them that had captivated me years ago. I start to pull at my restraints again in an attempt to reach for his face.