Clutching || Bucky Barnes

2

"What the fuck Steve!" Basil shouted as soon as the call connected. "I mean what in the bloody loving fuck are you thinking? What is anyone thinking? Is this going to be like Ultron?? Cause that turned out great. The whole 'not tell Basil anything until the last possible moment'. Because that worked so well". His voice had lowered into a furious and heavily sarcastic drawl as he paced up and down the hallway. Queenie sat outside the kitchen door, watching him as he walked.

At the mention of ultron, more anger fizzed in his veins. From the open doorway of his bedroom Henry visibly winced. He remembered what had happened with ultron. A avengers adventure that Basil had been forced to sit out, though through no choice of his own. Since ultron had taken over the internet, Steve hadn't contacted Basil about the threat in fear of drawing attention to him. So Basil had been forced to watch the news for any news about his friends. Then when sokovia had began rising, he ha deen on the first plane out there to provide emergency medical support to the civilians. Pulled in like a trump card at the last moment to help destroy the robot army. But still too late to change anything. People had still died all because Basil hadn't gotten there sooner. It had been another weight added to his shoulders. Along with Bucky's death, Dying with Steve, the losses in the battle of New York, and hydra. (Although none of those weights hung as heavily as the winter soldier did. That weight woke him up at night to suffocate him.)

"Jesus Steve", Basil sighed, anger draining out of him like soup. It left exhaustion and deep aching sadness in its wake. He rubbed a hand over his eyes. In the living room, the news was still playing. He paused to look through at the bright screen. The face of the newly deceased king of Wakanda was bright in the pixels as the anchor spoke. "Please Steve. I need to know. Is it him?" His voice was vulnerable and he rubbed his other hand over his eyes. The line was tense for a moment. Steve's thought process was almost audible down the line. Only audible because Basil knew him. He could picture the expression, the tight press of his lips and the frown.

It was several seconds later when he heard Steve exhale deeply. Basil felt tears spring to his eyes. Steve sounded older than he was before. Although they had only called a few days ago after the incident with Wanda in Nigeria, he sounded older and angry. Frustrated and stubborn, but also exhausted and resigned. Steve had not revealed much about what had happened in Nigeria and what the fall out was. It was classified and Basil was no longer apart of the team. It had only been two days since but a lot of things must have changed. Steve's voice was different. When he spoke again, it was slow and clear, like reading from a script. "I don't know".

Basil breathed out shakily and leaned against the wall. His legs felt numb and he slid down the wall until he was seated on the blue carpet. Queenie wandered over and scented his raised hand with a meep. He began stroking her slowly. "So what's going on?" He said after a while. "What's happening? Where's Bucky?"

Steve exhaled. "I might know. I have a lead". Basil paused and they shared a silence down the line.

"How was Peggy's funeral?" He asked. He hadn't attended. Work conflicting with the time. Half of him had wanted to go but half of him didn't feel like it was his place. He had met her at most three or four times before the ice. He mostly knew of her. Steve talked about her and Bucky. Stories from childhood and of when Peggy helped train him. The ceremony was in London but the church would be full. Basil had gone later, once his shift was over and all the mourners had left, and lit a candle for her. It was the least he could do.

"It was nice", Steve replied. "There were a lot of people. Sharon spoke. Nice".

"I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you".

"Sam was there. And Nat. She came. I wasn't alone", Steve reassured. It didn't lesson Basil's guilt though.

"Still".

"Are you alone?" Steve asked.

"No. I have my roommate. He knows enough to get that it's serious. But not enough to be on a radar".

"Good. I don't want you to be alone at the moment".

"Are you still in London?" Basil voiced.

"Not for long. I'm going to get him".

"I want to come with you". Basil's voice was firm.

"Are you sure?"

"Steve please. I need to be there. If it is him then I need to be there. You can't leave me behind. Not after DC". His voice tried to remain firm but there was a note of pleading to it. "Steve".

Steve sighed again. "I'll text you the address. Meet me there in an hour".

"Sir yes sir". Basil felt a slight smile of relief on his face.

"Basil. It might be a repeat of last time. We don't know how much his mind will have changed after what Hydra did to it. He may not remember us at all", Steve warned.

"I know. But he also might remember us", Basil pointed out. His voice high with desperate hope. "Don't ignore the other chances".

"I'm just trying to prepare you for the worst".

"The worst has already happened", Basil stated. "We lost him and we lost our time. He came back to us a puppet with hydra on his heels. Our worst has happened and anything that could come in the future could never be worse than that".

"Careful. That sounds like a jinx".

Basil let out a small scoff. "Bad karma has been using us as its punching bag and I am now beginning to anticipate the blows. At this point, I think my trauma wagon is full".

"Don't challenge the universe. See you in an hour. I've go to go".

"Bye". Then the phone line cut off.

Basil turned his phone off and lowered his hand as his head tilted back to hit the wall with a thunk. Eyes sliding closed as he allowed himself to breath. Queenie hopped up onto the his lap and began kneeling the material of his hoodie. Her purrs a comforting rumble as he digested the emotions swirling in his belly. After a minute of thought, he heard the shuffle of socked feet. Henry coming to stand over him, his mug of tea in one hand. Basil blinked to look at him as the auburn haired man joined him on the carpet. "That sounded like a thought phone call", he commented.

"Relationship issues", Basil joked. "The best friend and the ex have issues".

"I saw the news", Henry frowned. He knew that about Basil and Bucky and Steve of course. Far more than what Basil had hinted at to Steve. Henry knew almost everything. It was not like Basil could hide it when they lived together. "So. You're going after him?"

"Yeah", Basil murmured. His attention on stroking Queenie. She scented his hand, ear rubbing against his fingers as she continued to purr. "I can't not go. I'd hate myself if I stayed. I need to see him. It's been two years".

Henry nodded, not even bothering with trying to argue against him. "Alright. I'll be here when you return then".

"You're the cat sitter", Basil shot him a small grin. Henry chuckled and reached over to stroke Queenie's back.

"Could be a worse job. Just don't die out there. I can't afford the rent here by myself".

"I'll be fine", Basil reassured. Thought he knew he couldn't promise anything. "I'll be back".

Unedited

I'm at uni now and I miss my cats. 😭