Maybe, Never Really

I didn't know (part 1)

" Can I just get a coffee please"
" Sure. Is that all?"
My dad nodded and handed the man behind the counter his card.
" I'll just go get us a table dad" I said and in return he offered me a smile before I grabbed some sugars and headed over to a table by the diner's window. My dad wanted to come here for breakfast this morning because a colleague of his owns it and he thought it would be nice for us to have breakfast together before my first day of school. We barely spend anytime together because of how hard he works but he does try really hard and things haven't been very easy on him since mum's departure either. My dad's not rich but we're not poor either. We live comfortably and I'm happy. My dad says that's all that counts. But I know he's suffering probably even worse than I am. What happened to my mum came as a shock to both of us, even though we had noticed her lethargy, her countless tantrums and her temper we never thought it would be worse than it seemed.

"What you thinking about Tara?" My dad asked as he came over with our food.
"School" I lied.
"I'm sure you'll be fine, Tara. You've always been good at making friends"
"Yeah I'm actually excited" I lied again. My dad smiled and looked down at his stack of pancakes. I added a couple sugars into my coffee and watched him eat, making small talk every now and then but my mind was far away from the diner. My mind was back at my old school where my old friends were probably busy not remembering me. I hadn't ended things well with them. I dumped my possessive boyfriend the day I left and have a bruise on my hip as evidence and I stopped talking to Sarah and Michelle entirely after my mum was taken away so I didn't have to say much of a goodbye to them either. They hated my guts for shutting them out when they wanted to help, they didn't see how we they could be my friends for so long and still have me hide so much from them. Maybe this fresh start was exactly what I needed and it would start today and I prayed and hoped it would be a good one.

After breakfast at the diner I took my car to school which was extremely close to the diner, Din's Dinner to be exact. The sound of it's name made me smile. I found a really good parking spot, so the day was looking good. I rubbed my hands together as I entered the school office. It was a cold day and I was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans with a floral shirt and a pair of boots. I was looking at the school's trophy cabinet when Mrs. Marin the school's receptionist asked me in. She handed me my timetable and told me to take a seat, she left the office and came back with a blonde skinny girl who looked like she couldn't care less about anything.
" Tara this is .. " I was too busy trying to close the zipper on my bag that I missed her name but she would be showing me to my locker and first class according to Miss Marin so with that we left the office.
" I'm sorry what was your name?" I asked as soon as we were in the school hallways.
" let's face it. It's not like we're going to be friends so you don't need to know my name and I couldn't care less about what your's is" she said fearlessly.
Well she must have seen the shock etched all over my face because she didn't let me respond, she tossed my bag at me and hurried off but not before pointing to her left saying " your locker is somewhere over there"
I was stunned. She was exactly the kind I wouldn't mind avoiding. I didn't know what made her act like that towards someone she barely knew andI was certain that I didn't want to know the terrible cause. Following the class numbers I decided I would just head towards my first class which was English Literature, finally, something to look forward to. It took me awhile to get there so I must have been at least 7 minutes late when I knocked on the door of the classroom which matched my schedule. I opened the door gently after a deep voice on the other end said come in. The teacher couldn't have been more than 30 years old and when he saw me at first he looked a bit confused but then a wave of realisation cleared his face as he walked towards me introducing himself. After our introduction he asked me to share my name with the class and take a seat. I spotted an empty desk in the middle row of the class on the far corner and took a couple steps towards it before my world spun and I ended up sprawled on the floor. I don't know how on earth I ended down there but I'm guessing the bag strap now secured around my ankle had something to do with it. Laughter echoed around the room as I sighed in defeat. The boy who reached out to help me was probably the owner of the bag and from him face I could tell he felt pretty bad about the mess it had caused.
I didn't know him. I didn't know how I would live off this embarrassing start with my class. I didn't know how on earth I was going to stop the blush of embarrassment on my cheeks. But I knew he was different just by how genuine his sorry was and knowing that was enough to make this experience a good one instead of one I would regret for the rest of my two years here.