[Closed] Warrior Cat OC Ratings

Ferretburr

This OC belongs to @Tul1pfields 

Name; Ferretburr

5/5 Wonderfully unique! I wasn't sure about the prefix, but apparently Ferret- is a canon one in Ferretclaw. It sounds really nice, I like it a lot.

Gender; She-cat

Okay!

Clan; None (Formally RiverClan!)

The opposite of your general transformation, interesting.

Appearance; A tall and slender Siamese she-cat, with piercing green eyes.

12/15 I love Siamese so much. However, one of the distinctive traits of the breed is their beautiful ice-blue or blue-grey eyes. It does make a bit more sense since she's not quite purebred (her father isn't Siamese), but make sure to say that she's only a half-Siamese moggy!

Edit: She may be a Snowshoe (Siamese/American Shorthair mix), which is one of my favorite breeds. I'll include a picture in case you want to see! (You'll find it at very bottom.)

Interesting fact about Siamese I learned while fact-checking this: They actually have really poor night vision since they were bred to keep those blue eyes. 

Age; 70 moons (At death)

Okay! She lived to the human equivalent of a little less than 41.

Personality; Ferretburr is known as cold and manipulative, often being kind to those who she can use, but leaving them if it means she could save her own back, but this has its faults as it lead to her own death, if she had been with a friend she probably would of survived.

22/25 That's a good twist! Her mistakes came back to haunt her. However, even if she's a villain, try to intersperse a few positive traits. For instance, say she cares for other former kittypets/loners/rogues, and she's sympathetic to them. Or maybe she's really hard-working and patient. Just a suggestion!

Likes; The barn, shrew, the wind in her fur.

These are nice details, I like them quite a bit! Nothing to change here.

Dislikes; WindClan, RiverClan, Her mother becoming a Kittypet

Does she like ThunderClan, ShadowClan, and SkyClan, or is she indifferent to them? Does she hate her mother in general, or just her choice? 

Edit: Why does she dislike WindClan? Doesn't she hold a fondness for her birthplace?

Family;

Mother; Fernskip

Siamese she-cat with blue eyes.

All's good here! Be wary of wild purebreds, though, unless she's a first generation kittypet.

Father; Olivewish

Brown Tom with a splash of white on his chest, green eyes.

All clear!

Siblings; Oatkit (Siamese she-cat; passed) Frecklekit; (Brown tom; passed)

Aww, poor kits! I do think that none of them would be full Siamese, but again, they may be Snowshoe. I'm not sure what breed most warrior cats are, though, but they seem to be a type of shorthair. Why happened to them?

Backstory; Ferretburr was born to a Half-clan relationship, for the first few moons of her life staying in Windclan, Until at the next gathering Her mother announces she is leaving to be a Kittypet, and Taking Ferretkit with her, who is frightened, and refuses. Fernskip leaves anyway, and Olivewish takes her back to RiverClan (to much protest from Ferret though!) Ferretkit becomes an apprentice, Though she is a Windclan cat at heart, and struggles with her apprenticeship, Feeling like a failure as her father had expected she would fit right in. She overhears the elders discussing her, claiming she was a burden to the clan, Ferretpaw is very upset, and so she runs away. As she stumbles out of the territory, she comes across the barn, hiding inside of it, Her father and mentor come looking for her, but she stays hidden, feeling they would be better off without her.

Aww, poor Ferret. I'd expect it wouldn't be too hard to get accepted into the clan, given that she joined as a kit. However, if she was a poor warrior, her history would probably be blamed. It doesn't fit with her personality, but I'd assume it's still developing since she's young.

- Timeskip - 

A group of rouges enter the barn, challenging her to leave, she manipulates the leader into letting her join, before she kills him (Whoa ferret!) the group is reluctant but they take her as a new leader, during this time Ferret develops a deep hearted for the clans she had been let down in, swearing vengeance. On a dark night, Another cat appears called Echo, seemingly alone, telling Ferret she has a perfect plan, and that it could work in both of their favours, she agrees, and at that full-moon gathering they take over, the rouges swarming in and The ThunderClan leader is murdered. This leads to the final battle, Ferret and her rouges are outnumbered as the clans begin to fight back, and she leaves Echo to die, shortly after she is cornered by a group of RiverClan warriors, and killed.

Wow! That's quite a change from the emotional cat that was there just a paragraph before. How did she learn to fight so well? Did the rogues that she joined teach her, and she used it against them? Although, she must've honed some skills since she had some thirty moons between her apprenticeship and the battle!

That must be a big group of rogues to even attempt to take on all five clans, even if they are outnumbered. (Unless you're not counting SkyClan. Sometimes I don't, admittedly, since I mostly read the first few arcs. Still a rather big group!)

Ferret sure has become a really selfish cat. She's let herself become worse because they thought she was. It's an interesting story for sure.

Here's the Snowshoe picture! They're really beautiful, in my opinion.

All in all, Ferretburr is really interesting! Especially so if she's a protagonist rather than an antagonist. There are a few parts that might need a bit more detail/clarification, but overall she's really great.

Thanks so much for your submission!