Insatiable

Chapter 21 - He Don't

Anxious—that's the only word I knew to describe my feelings right now.

Alaric always knew how to put my body through a frenzy. Just those glaciers alone sent constant chills down my spine. It also didn't help the fact that it's been two almost three years since the last time I've had sex. Alaric included, but still—he's more than eager to have sex with me. I've still been on the hesitant side for more than one reason. I've fucked up. Bad.

Alaric cupped my face in his hands and gazed down at me. Just like that, I had the validation I needed. I was forgiven, but why didn't I believe that?

"What's wrong?" He asked, worry laced in his tone.

I pulled away from him and just sat down on the bed. I wanted to have sex with him, I wanted to continue our relationship, I just didn't know how to do that after all the havoc I've wrecked our relationship. I took scorned to another level.

He sat down beside me and just smiled.

"Talk to me, love," he said gently. "What's on your mind?"

"How wrong I've done you and how eager you are to forgive me," I muttered. "I did cruel things."

Alaric chuckled softly. "Of course you'd want to talk about that right now."

"I was pregnant, Alaric," I said, my voice barely a whisper. "By Wes."

He took a deep breath before speaking. "You want to know what I think?" He started. Oh, jeez, here it comes. "I think that what you did wasn't wrong. In all actuality, it was kind of severe but it wasn't like we were together. Once you walked out that door, you and I had broke up for good. The reality of the fact that you and Wes shared the same space for over half a year dawned on me. Yes, eventually chemistry would form between you two. I can't be mad at the man for being drawn to such a beautiful woman, and I can't blame a beautiful woman for caring for a man that picked her up when she was down. He was there for you, I'm not mad at that. I don't hate you for it either. The way I've managed to see it is that Wes could've denied you, just as you could've picked someone else. But that's not how things happened. It doesn't change the fact that no matter what happens between us. I forgave you because I still love you."

I was speechless.

"You know," he continued. "With you being so close to death, it brought me to reality. It made me realize that there is only one person on this earth that I can't live without, and that's you Xenia Oren. Anything could happen—I'll forgive you because my bond and love for you is stronger than all the power in the world. You are my world. I can't imagine living a life without you in it."

"Alaric..."

He brushed his thumb across my cheek. "So listen, if you're not feeling sex right now, I'm not going to keep pushing it—"

"Stop," I said. "You can't even think about saying that right after all the things you've said."

He looked confused.

"What do you mean?"

I climbed on top of his lap and stared down into his eyes.

"This man, this Alaric that has matured so much in such little time... he's the reason why I can continue this. The strength that I lost before my accident. When you speak like that... baby, it sets my soul on fire."

I wanted him so bad.

I was going to fuck the shit out of him.

The look in his eyes were just the look of vulnerability. I've never see him look at me like this. Not even on the ocean. He truly was new and improved.