Anarchy - Young Royals Season 2 / Continuation

Chapter 4 - Hurt You So Bad

Simon always hated Christmas. When his dad lived with them, it just meant more booze, more fights, and Simon and Sara staying in their rooms for days. Now, it seems strange that Simon was actually looking forward to it. He loved giving presents to people, showing that he understands them. He wondered what he would get Wille if he could. Wille loved the cold, so maybe a scarf. Or a hat. It didn't matter though. Christmas eve with his family felt safe this year. Watching Christmas films while drinking hot chocolate was soothing to all of them. As they were half way through The Polar Express, Simon heard something drop to the floor by the door. He volunteered to go. As he bounded gleefully to the door, he felt like nothing could ruin his joy and gratefulness to be spending Christmas with his family. That joy was instantly crushed as he looked at the two sealed envelopes on the floor, addressed to Simon and Sara. He would recognise that handwriting anywhere. His dad knew not to get in contact with them, they had made that perfectly clear the last time. Yet, here he is, still haunting them. Simon reluctantly picked up the letters and shoved them into his pocket.

"What was it Simon?" His mum shouted through from the other room.

"Nothing! Just leaflets..." No way he was going to let his dad ruin their Christmas. He wanted to throw them straight in the kitchen bin. Knowing they would be found that way though, he shoved them in his pocket. He would open his later, when everyone was asleep.

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Christmas without Erik was unbearable. For every Christmas since they were kids, they would sit in front of the fire together talking about anything they wanted. About people they liked, or didn't, what they hoped for for Christmas, what they wanted to be when they were older. Even at a young age, Wille knew Erik would be king and Wille pitied him for it. He felt guilty that Erik had all of this responsiblility and Wille could do whatever he wanted. And Erik was willing to be king and let Wille live his life as he wanted. Now everything was different. Erik wasn't around to let Wille be himself. He had to do it alone now.

Erik being absent left a huge hole in the palace. Everything had changed. Wille and his dad were never close. And his mother was always too busy to be around for Wille. So, he was passed around from nanny to nanny, private school to private school. He never felt wanted. Now he was the centre of it all. Next in line.

Wille's parents were usually busy on Christmas eve, hosting a dinner party or something of the like. But this year, they stayed home. He wondered if it was because of him, to keep an eye on him. Wille dreaded that. In the evening, he sat by the fire as he always had done, wondering what Erik would tell him to do. He needed someone to say that everything was going to be okay, because everything felt so lost. He thought of Simon, what he would be doing right now. Would he be surrounded by his family under a big blanket? Would he be smiling? These thoughts consumed Wille as he fell deeper and deeper into himself.

"I remember setting carrots, cookies, and milk out for Father Christmas every year here," a voice said behind Wille, "You always were the one to put out the fire to let Father Christmas come down the chimney, but Erik would help of course."

Wille's father sat next to him, handing him a cup of hot chocolate, which he accepted. "Everything is different now with Erik gone. I can't imagine what you must be feeling Wilhelm". He let that hang in the air for a moment, both of them staring into the roaring fire.

"Dad, I have got no clue what to do", Wille said softly. And it was true. He knew what he wanted, but he didn't know if he wanted what would come after; a lifetime of constant scrutiny for both him and Simon.

His father said nothing, just sipped on his drink. With a sigh, he began, "Wilhelm... Son, being who we are isn't easy. Your mother always says it's a privilege. I always had a hard time seeing it like that. Marrying your mother was the best decision I ever made, but I was never ready for how much pressure would come with being royal. And I am sorry you never got to choose. Especially now with Erik gone and with everything that has happened, I can't imagine what you must be thinking about it all."

Silence fell once again. Wille kept his eyes fixed on the flicking flames, thinking about what his father had just said. He didn't want to put Simon through this, being with a prince. It wasn't fair to him. He deserves to be free.

"I can't control you Wilhelm, Lord knows that we have tried. But ultimately you have to choose. We can't keep protecting you. Whatever you do, we will love you. But things will have to change. Whatever you decide, please consider the ramifications. Who it affects." And with that, his dad finished the last of his hot chocolate and stood up to leave.

"Do what you have to do, Wilhelm. Be yourself. I think Erik would say the same." He closed the door behind him. This just made Wilhelm more confused. What he wanted was to be with Simon, but he didn't want to hurt him by dragging him back into the spotlight for everyone to observe like a circus monkey. He knew he had to choose between Simon and his family, but either way, it would change everything.