This Isn't a Fairytale, It's Reality.

Part 6

Robby had been telling me to just tell Jason that I like him for about a week after I asked him if I should. I wanted to tell him, but at the same time I didn't. What if he stops talking to me? Maybe he won't. Maybe he'll be fine with it. Robby kept telling me to just go for it, that I don't have anything to lose. 

"He could like you back. You never know until you try."  He had a point. Just go for it. He might already know anyways. 

"Okay fine. I'll do it," I texted Robby. "Should I text him or..?" 

"Yeah just text him. He should reply in a matter of days."  Well that was reassuring. I forced myself to write out the text, Hey can I tell you something? My thumb hovered over the send button. I really didn't want to do this, but at the same time I did. Ten minutes went by of me just staring at my phone screen. My heart started racing. My hands started shaking. Fuck it. I pressed send and immediately threw my phone across my bed. I was sitting upright on my bed, but I collapsed and just layed there. Shaking. Breathing heavy. Heart racing. Motionless in White was playing in the background in hopes of distracting me from getting worked up over this. They didn't help much at first. After twenty minutes of panicking and overthinking, I was calmed down. Jason still hadn't replied. I knew he wouldn't reply. I kept Robby updated with this progression.

"Hey Jason still hasn't replied. I bet his phone's dead"

"Haha yeah it might be. Don't worry about it. You'll be fine." Yeah whatever. If he hasn't replied by 7 tomorrow night just chat him on facebook. 

School went by quicker than ever. Soon enough, it was 7. Shockingly enough, still no reply. I opened my laptop and logged into facebook. I kept Jason's message box opened on the bottom of my screen, so I looked towards the corner of the screen. The green online dot sat beside his name. Well here goes nothing. 

"Are you able to check your phone or should I talk with you on here?"

"Oh sorry it's out of battery, what's up?"

"Haha that's fine. Can I tell you something?"

"Yeah sure"

"Okay. Welll...I sorta kinda like you. Please don't hate me."

"Yeah I know haha and I don't hate you but I think it'd be better if we were friends, and I'm sure you know that haha" Of course I know that, I'm not an idiot. I know I don't meet your standards.

"I wasn't asking you out, I was just making you aware I guess? Haha"

"Yeah I know ahaha" Obviously you didn't if you had to pretty much reject me. As much as I hated his reply, I was happy to get it over with. I felt like a weight had been lifted off of my chest. He already knew, which didn't surprise me, but I still felt so much better after I told him.  I made sure to text Robby about what happened.

"So I told Jason I like him. You were right, I do feel better."