Jason Cosmo: Hero Wanted

Chapter 8

Down through the rolling hills of the Brythalian lake country we rode, along roads that were little more than dirt tracks. Goats, cattle, and swine roamed freely in the pastures. Serfs toiled in the fields while their overlords hunted and feasted and mustered their knights for the spring campaigning season.

Brythalia was a patchwork of mutually hostile feudal domains. Each of the kingdom's many knights, barons, baronets, overbarons, underbarons, earls, earlets, counts, viscounts, miscounts, dukes, and other nobles was master of his own estate—and eager to become master of his neighbor's. When the nobles weren't fighting each other, they replenished their coffers by charging outrageous tariffs, taxes, and tolls on anyone and anything they could. This included safe passage fees at every gate, bridge, and border—with neither safety, nor passage, guaranteed.

Mercury's purse was seemingly quite full, but stopping every few miles to shell out another handful of coppers grew tiresome. After several days of this, Merc's patience ran out.

"Halt!" ordered a slovenly man-at-arms as we approached a rickety wooden bridge over a trickle of a brook. He and his comrade crossed their halberds to bar our way. "None may cross the bridge but they pay the toll!"

"Whose bridge is this?" snapped Merc.

"The bridge of His Grace the Baron Trothgar, you varlet! The price of passage is ten coppers!"

"The baron's bridge looks unstable," said Merc. "Several planks are missing, the railings lean, and the piers appear rotten. Hardly a ten copper bridge. You should pay us to cross it."

"Pay you to cross? What nonsense it that?"

"It will be a miracle if that bridge can support the weight of a horse, much less four. If it gives way and my horse breaks a leg, who will compensate me?"

"That is your own problem," said the insolent soldier.

"It will be the baron's problem, if his bridge injures my horse."

"Turn back then."

"We'll ford the stream instead."

"That's not allowed!"

"Why not? If I want to get wet, it's my business."

"It's the baron's business, this being his stream! There is a fording toll—ten coppers. Plus the ten copper fine on account of fording not being allowed."

"What if I just fly across?"

"Fly?" The guard scoffed. "Are you some sort of wizard?"

"Maybe."

The soldier was suddenly not so sure of himself. "Um...there is, of course, the wizard fee if you are."

"Why am I not surprised?"

"We don't always collect that one," the man added hastily, beads of sweat forming on his brow.

"I understand," said Merc. "Because if I were a wizard, I would not take kindly to these niggling little nuisance charges. I would likely express my displeasure in a most unpleasant manner."

"And?" asked the soldier, while his comrade backed away slowly.

"And what?" countered Merc.

"Well, are you or aren't you? Don't toy with us, man!"

Mercury stroked his beard as if considering the matter. He arched one eyebrow and said, "I am in point of fact...not a wizard. If you take my meaning. No wizards here."

"Well, that is a relief!" said the soldier. "We heard a rumor that an especially bloodthirsty wizard is abroad in the company of a pair of vicious she-demons and some sort of half-troll henchman. Massacred an entire village up in the forest lands a few days back!"