Save Your Heart For Me *TO BE PUBLISHED BY LIFEBOOKS

Part 10

DANA

MOM was preparing to go to bed when I went inside my parent's room. It was one of those nights that my dad came home late. Natigil si Mommy sa paglalagay ng night cream sa mukha nang yumakap ako rito. Tumayo ito mula sa dresser at hinila ako sa kama para doon gantihan ang yakap ko.

"What's wrong, baby? Is something bothering you?" tanong ni Mommy Elsa dahil hindi ako nagsasalita habang nakayakap lang rito.

"I slapped someone today."

"What?" Lumuwang ang yakap sa akin ni Mommy para tingnan ako sa mukha. "Did you have a fight with someone at school?"

Tumango ako. Mukhang naalarma si Mommy.

"Bakit? Hindi mo naman ginagawa 'yan noon. Are you hurt?" Sinipat nito ang mukha, leeg at mga braso ko. "Did you...?" Hinawakan nito ang mga pisngi ko. "Did you faint?"

Umiling ako. Ang akala ng mommy ko ay nakipag-catfight ako. Ikinuwento ko rito ang tungkol kay Kingston.

"Oh, it's a boy."

"I hate him, Mom."

"Don't hate, baby." Hinaplos ni Mommy ang buhok ko. "It's a big emotion, an ugly feeling. Remember, you must always be happy and free from negative emotions. So forgive that guy already and move on."

"Do I really have to forgive him?" pag-alma ko. "He said mean things about me."

"It's okay, baby. We can't please everybody. Hindi natin hawak ang opinions nila tungkol sa atin. Isa pa, those people don't really know us at all. 'Wag na lang tayong magpaapekto sa mga sinasabi nila, lalo na kung hindi naman sila malaking parte ng buhay natin. What matters most is what our loved ones think about us. Kasi sila ang mas nakakakilala sa atin. Like me and your dad and Kuya Damian. Isama mo na rin si Inah. We think you are beautiful, charming, and sweet. And your childishness is just right for your age and that makes you more endearing. Especially to me because I can still treat you as a baby. Even though you're taller than me now."

Kiniliti ako ni Mommy sa tagiliran kaya napaigtad ako at napahagikgik. Yumakap uli ako rito.

My mom was right. Kingston did not know me well that's why he could easily form those opinions about me. Kaya invalid ang mga sinabi niya tungkol sa akin. Invalid and insignificant, because he was not even a part of my life. I got along with everyone around. I did not make any enemies because my patience was big enough.

Si Kingston lang ang nakaubos ng pasensiya ko. Come to think of it. Hindi naman talaga ako madaling magalit pero bakit ang dali kong nagalit sa kanya nang dalawang beses?

"Forget about what the boy said. Don't fight with him anymore. And apologize for the slap that you gave him."

"Mommy..." pag-angal ko.

"Yes, do that. Don't keep grudges and don't hate anyone. Don't give your heart extra work. Besides, I never taught you to physically hurt anyone. Honestly, I'm a bit disappointed."

Bumuntong-hininga na lang ako. I needed to do what my mom said. Kailangan kong mag-apologize sa pananakit kay Kingston. Hindi ko naman talaga ginustong sampalin siya. Hindi na ako nag-isip nang gawin iyon. In fact, I felt a bit guilty after doing that.

"I'm sorry, Mommy."

Niyakap uli ako ni Mommy. "I love you."

"I love you." I kissed her on the cheek. She did the same.

"You must go to sleep. It's past bedtime na."

"Ano'ng oras dadating si Daddy?"

"I don't know." Bumalik si Mommy sa harap ng dresser at itinuloy ang paglalagay ng face cream. "But maybe he's on his way."

Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya sa salamin habang nakaupo pa rin sa edge ng kama. My mom looked so young and beautiful but her eyes lacked glow. I knew exactly why.

I knew she was unhappy but she was just trying to hide it. Actually, sila ni Daddy. Alam kong hindi na sila masaya sa isa't isa. It had been so long since I saw their eyes sparked when they looked at each other. Ngayon, pakiramdam ko, nagpapanggap na lang silang masaya at nagmamahalan kapag nasa harapan ko.

Feeling ko, nagsasama na lang sila ni Daddy para sa akin. Hindi nila kayang maghiwalay dahil masasaktan ako. They did not want to break my heart, like literally. Matagal ko na silang gustong tanungin kung mahal pa nila ang isa't isa pero naduduwag ako. I did not want to confirm my suspicion.

I still hoped that my parents would somehow find themselves falling in love with each other again.