Vanilla Dusk ✓

Loop Part 6

He was startled by the chiming alarm. Shayne made an abrupt turn and fumbled on the nightstand, before snapping his eyes open and remembering that he had never set the alarm. He dozed off while thinking about Erik the previous night. He sat up and yawned, snatching the alarm clock which he was quite certain he had dumped into the bin a few days before because it broke down and rang no more.

While he was still examining the clock dubiously, his phone rang. He picked up the call without glimpsing the screen and from the other end of the line wafted a tender voice that completely woke him, if he wasn't already awake.

'Morning, sleepyhead,' greeted Erik.

There was no mistaking it. It was his voice and his usual way of checking up on him on their date.

'Just checking if you're up yet,' said Erik. 'Nine at King's Cross Station, right?'

Shayne, still thunderstruck, dumped the alarm clock on his bed and now stared at the phone screen.

15 August.

'Hello?'

Shayne trotted out of his room and stormed downstairs, almost slipping halfway as he raced towards the sitting room and flipped through the calendar hanging on the wall.

15 August.

He stared at the clock.

Eight thirty.

'Shayne?' Erik raised his voice. 'You there, Shayne? Are we meeting today?'

'Erik?' gasped Shayne, his hand shuddering, his legs as well. He scampered upstairs and barged into his father's room.

Empty.

And it shouldn't be, because his father had requested a holiday to stay with Shayne after Erik's death. Now his suitcase was missing, his suit as well.

'Shayne? Are you alright?'

'Erik, is that you?' cried Shayne, falling to the ground on his knees. He held the phone close to his ear as if the other boy would simply vanish without a trace the next second. 'Where're you? You okay?'

'Huh? Me? At home, of course. Gonna head out in a minute. Why're you asking this?'

'Don't,' Shayne almost bawled, struggling to steady himself with his still quivering legs. He rushed back into this room and got a much clearer view. The stack of unwashed clothes he had left in one corner had disappeared, along with other rubbish that had piled up near his bed over the past two weeks. Erik's belongings were nowhere to be seen. Light crept into the room. Drawing the curtains, Shayne squinted at the rare sight of sunshine and he remembered that it was also sunny that day.

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.

He stole a glance of the pocket watch, the only thing that was unfit in the frame. Everything was back to how it had looked like 15 August, the day they went out and had ice-cream and Erik left.

The hand had stopped moving. It landed right at the first interval. The ticking ceased.

'Shayne? Can you hear me?' shouted Erik over the phone. 'I'm coming around.'

'No,' said Shayne bluntly. 'Don't come around. I'll go and pick you up.'

The image of Erik being sent flying past him and subsequently crushed by the truck flashed across his mind.

So it was a dream after all. A horrendous dream.

Erik waited outside his building and as soon as he spotted Shayne's car, he smiled. He scurried towards his boyfriend and Erik knocked on his car window. Shayne was blinking hollowly at the road ahead before he snapped out of his trance. He gasped at the mere sight of Erik, who was wearing a light blue denim jacket, a striped shirt underneath and a pair of tight dark jeans. He was dressed exactly the same as he had done on that day. Before Erik could ask to hop in, Shayne unlocked the car door and dashed out, tackling Erik into a bear hug. He wrapped his arms around the boy so tightly Erik struggled to breathe. He sniffed him and felt his contour with his fingers, making sure that his essence was real and not just one of his delusions.

'Shayne, what's wr –'

'Gosh, I thought I lost you,' cried Shayne. It was uncanny to see him so sentimental. Shayne seldom shed a tear and when he did feel blue, he would simply stay mute for a day or two. Erik had never seen him so agitated. Even when menaced to a corner by the school bullies, he would pull it off with his calm demeanour, smacking them with his bag and kicking them in the stomach without even a cry.

Erik felt that something was off but he couldn't put a finger on it. He allowed Shayne to hold him and repeatedly whisper his name next to his ear. It was a warm and sunny day and his heart wouldn't stop hammering against his chest.

When they were back inside the car, Shayne told Erik about his nightmare, the one in which he got into a car accident trying to save him from an uncontrollable truck. Erik listened with a nod and then chuckled, teasing Shayne for his exaggerated response. To play safe, Shayne changed their destination and suggested going to Hyde Park. While they were driving there, they passed the street where the ice-cream shop was situated and the exact same scene recurred. A cargo truck sped downhill, crashed into several pedestrians and sabotaged a few shops. The cargo came loose and rolled down the slope, striking a few innocent passers-by before breaking into pieces. A street away Shayne and Erik stared in horror at the entire process inside their own car. Shaye's hands wouldn't stop shivering on the wheel and when Erik turned to his partner, Shayne was sweating, his face as pale as a sheet.

'Shayne, did you see that?' said Erik, still in shock. 'The truck...it just...'

'Yes.'

So it wasn't a dream at all.

Shayne wouldn't stop shaking and his sight got blurry again. Erik calmed down faster and before long, he had taken Shayne into his arms, patting his back and telling him that it was alright.

'It's okay.'

They spent the whole day sitting inside the park, sometimes on a bench spotting squirrels scampering around and sometimes on the grass watching the swans in the pond. Shayne was lost for words and all he could think of was the truck, the blood, the bits and pieces and...

Erik.

Did it actually happen, or was it just a dream and why was he able to foresee in his dream? Was this all a bad joke?

'You okay?' asked Erik, nudging Shayne's elbow. 'Or still traumatised?'

'I'm fine,' replied Shayne, who managed to look into Erik's eyes. It was a date after all and he shouldn't ruin it. Erik was still alive. He was safe. He was breathing next to him, smiling and picking tiny flowers from the garden trying to make a crude garland for fun.

'It's growling,' whined Erik.

'Huh?'

'My stomach.'

'Oh,' said Shayne. 'Let's go and grab something?'

They walked out of the park and Shayne kept Erik close to him that day, never letting him walk near the road or eat in an open space.