Short Story Collection

My Biggest Secret

So, this is a rather personal piece I wrote. It is based off of true emotions, so please don't judge too harshly. I'm still rather nervous about putting this out there. But I feel like this is a safe way to get it off my chest. Also, there's no prompt for this one. I was just feeling insecure one night and if pushing those insecurities down don't work I try to soothe myself with writing :P

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  "I love you," Sebastian said, looking me right in the eye.

 "Why?" That's immediately what I think. Thank God I didn't say it out loud.

 "Er..." Unfortunately, that is what I said. Way to go, Grace.

  Sebastian's bright eyes dimmed and I quickly try to recover.

 "Sorry, um, I've just never had a guy say that to me before. At least not in person."

 "I see..." is all he said, but I could see the sting of rejection in his eyes. This is so not going the right way.

 "No, no, no! Don't look so sad! I'm just trying to wrap my head around this." 

 "What's there to wrap your head around? I love you. It's quite simple, really."

 "Well, uh, that's it, actually. I don't understand why you love me. Like, what is there to love about me? In that sense, anyway."

  Sebastian stares at me in shock and I shift uncomfortably.

 "What?" He asks incredulously.

 "What is there to love about me?" I repeat. "I'm not that pretty, I'm dreadfully overweight, I'm only averagely smart, I'm too tall. I get why people love me as a friend or a sister or whatever, but not in the, well, love sense."

  Sebastian continues to stare at me and I continue fidget in my seat. I couldn't meet his eyes.

 "Please say something. I already feel stupid enough." I say, quietly looking down at my hands.

 "I don't even know," Sebastian begins but stops from a lack of words.

 "Boy, you really know how to make a girl feel special." My cheeks were on fire.

 "How can you be so stupid?" Sebastian asks suddenly. I sink a little lower in my seat.

 "Wow, two for two. Keep it up, buddy." Can't I go five minutes without messing something up?

 "Has the world messed with you so much that you can't even see your own beauty? Yes, I said beauty. You have the best smile I've ever seen. You're eyes are kind and intelligent. You carry yourself in such a way that wards off unwanted guests but you're always the first to smile or laugh. You came here on vacation and two days in you're asking how you can help. You care so deeply for people you don't even know. Your soul is so gentle and giving, you make me a better person just by knowing you." Sebastian had moved closer to me during his speech and I had tears in my eyes. "We only met a few days ago, but it just feels right when we're together. Like the whole world is at peace."

 I still couldn't meet his eyes. I felt the same way, but my logical side wouldn't give up without a fight.

 "But we live on two different continents."

 "With social media today it's like we live next door to each other."

 "But what if when you go to college we won't have time to talk?"

 "I'll make time."

 "What if we wanted to go on a date?"

 "We'd figure something out. A movie over Skype, maybe?"

 "We're both teenagers still. What if this isn't even real?" This was the question I was dreading the most. Sebastian and I were slowly leaning towards each other throughout my questioning.

 "It feels pretty real to me." Sebastian says. I can feel his breath on my lips. I hope my breath doesn't stink.

 "It feels real to me, too," I whisper.

  Sebastian smiles and kisses me, his hands on my cheeks, cradling my face. I kiss back and my arms wrap around his neck. When we come up for air my head lays on his shoulder as I hug him tightly, as if I were afraid to let go. His arms wrap around my waist and he just holds me.

 "I love you," I whisper against his shoulder and I can feel his smile.

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Okay. Well. That was extremely personal. I always feel weird when I write a kissing scene. Maybe it was uncalled for. Your thoughts? Anyway, thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it!

Oh, and by the way, don't worry about me. While I am extremely insecure about myself, I like to say that I'm on a journey to self acceptance. So I'm good, brah