The Story We Live

Why Am I The Stupid One

     Brad came awhile later and lied about his age. They bought it and let him sign our papers. He was going to be sent a bill later on but for right now the nurse explained Sean's diagnosis. He had passed out from blood loss.

     He'd lost ounces of blood due to of course, the cutting. They said that Sean would need to stay overnight in case of dizziness occurring.

     I'd never spent a night alone without Sean so I got a little nervous when she said that. Brad made sure I wasn't nervous by letting my canceled sleepover be rescheduled for tonight so that I wasn't so scared.

     I said my goodbye to Sean and promised I'd be back early. Brad and I soon made our way back to my house. He left me there alone while he went to pick up his brother, Hunter along with Serena.

     He said he would have taken me along but he needed some alone time to think.

     I respected that.

     About ten minutes after he left, I'd settled on the living room couch and was now in the middle of my program when the door bell rang.

     Serena lived three blocks away so I knew that Brad wouldn't be back this fast so it couldn't be him. Actually, I didn't even know anyone it could be.

     Sean says I should never, ever open the door for strangers so instead of opening it, I looked through the peep hole.

     All I could see was a pink flowery dress. I couldn't see the rest of the person but I thought to myself, "What kind of bad person would be wearing a flowery dress?"

     At that, I slowly opened the door. Once opened, I looked up. At first, I couldn't identify who the person was but then I looked behind the evil in her face and then I knew it was mom.

     "Mom? Are you here because you heard about Sean? He cut himself real bad and--" she cut me off.

"Like I care!" She spat, louder than needed. "I just came for my freaking pictures!" She stormed upstairs, leaving me alone and shaky.

     Seconds later, she returned with a brown cardboard box. She walked right passed me and out the door.

     I stood in the doorway, silently.

     "Bye. I...I love you, mom." I stammered. Sean always said that I wasn't allowed to show regard or concern for my mother so I was hesitant about letting those words come out.

     She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk without turning around and said, "Piss off, little girl." She kept walking all the way to her car.

     I waited until she pulled away before crumbling on the porch stairs, burying my face in my hands, and bawling. I bawled with no thought of stopping until I felt a hand on my collar. They pulled me up hard.

     I looked to see who it was and saw that I didn't know at all who he was. He was young yet older than me and he didn't look generally like a kind person. He looked like he was Sean's age which means he was around thirteen or so.

     "So your the kid everyones talking 'bout eh. You know, the one who's too idiotic as to read the word apple. You are such a loser and so is your stupid brother." He smirked as if enjoying himself.

     He brought back a terrible memory of the time I was shopping with Sean and he asked me to go get some apples from isle eleven. The isle numbers were on signs hanging from the cieling.

    I didn't know what the number eleven looked like so I tried reading the listings of the items in that isle on the signs. I saw a word starting with the letter a and tried sounding the word out.

    I wasn't aware that I was struggling with the word out loud until a boy came up behind me and said, "It says apple, idiot." Then he walked away.

     Now I know that he had friends to tell this story of my humiliation that he found so humorous.

   No one ever called Sean stupid until now and he had about the same amount of schooling as me. Everyone always calls me empty headed. I don't understand why I have to be the stupid one.

      I looked at the boy again and asked calmly, "Okay, so what does that have to do with you?" He smirked and threw me on the ground. "It's not really my job to break this to you but its just really fun so I'm gonna say it anyway."

     I was confused at what he was hinting at. "Your mom doesn't want you. She doesn't love you and she never will. Your a discrase and she's embarrassed by you. That's why she's never coming back."

He'd heard all this from Sean when he got so fired up when the kids were making fun of me for my reading errors in the store. He was screaming at them telling them how they didn't know how hard we had it.

He picked me up and examined me,waiting for my next move.

     I didn't want to but I had to. I cried. I cried hard and then harder and then I cried the hardest I ever had in my life. He laughed."Your nothing." Then he pushed me and I fell backwards.

     He stood there laughing then he started torturing me with his words. "Whats two plus two, idiot?" Before he could make fun of me any further, I heard him gasp and I opened my eyes. Brad had seen him from down the block and was now sprinting in our direction.

     The boy looked down at me wide eyed and I just starred up at him. Brad reached him, picked him up by the collar, and slammed him into the outside of the house.

     "Don't you ever, ever touch him again, clear?" He spoke through gritted teeth in the kid's face. The kid vigorously nodded then wriggled away from grasp and darted away.

      Brad helped me up and by now, Hunter and Serena had reached us and were frozen in place.

    "Well that was a lovely welcoming." Serena said sarcastically. I smiled and we all went inside.

      I may feel protected now, but I couldn't help the feeling of a stupid coward.