𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 ○ 𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘺𝘳𝘢𝘦 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴

just one night

──note.: rae isn't like this and this is my own angsty au.
             
                   

It hurts you seeing her like this. Like the whole world was turned against her─ like she lost all reason to continue living. And she did─ She really did.

She lost the only person who was willing to wait for her from late night until early morning.

She lost the only person who could put up with her shit, raging and yelling no matter what time it is or where.

She lost the only person who understands her and her bullshit reasonings. Whenever she would miss out on a date, pins the blame on someone else, miss important events in that person's life, and ignore when she was too furious at everything that went wrong.

She lost the only person who made her feel whole, warm, sane and loved. The feeling of being touched, kissed and loved like she's worth everything.

She lost you.

She remembers that night as clear as crystal. The night that made her heart physically ache, hot tears that spilled from her eyes.

She practically yelled at Fed because of all his bullshit, ignoring you when you tried to calm her down while she slammed the mouse and keyboard you gave her on her birthday. When she removed the headphones as well, it broke while she had a fit like a ten year old child.

She remembers you being by her side, telling her that everything will be alright and she would get through yet another frustrating game with Fed, but she blew up on you. Telling you that she didn't want your help, your optimism, or your coaxing. She yelled at you that you wouldn't understand the situation since all you do is nothing but cook, clean the house and baby her.

She expected you to just leave the room, let her calm down, and go back to you to apologize─ but no. You gave her a harsh, reality-check, bitch slap on the face as you screamed your own set of frustrations. About how you put up with her bullshit, always making her work her first priority, leaving you to cry alone with an empty bed beside her at night and in the morning. The priority one was uncalled for but that's what your felt. You felt as if you were nothing but a second option when Rae isn't doing anything at all.

It hurts being in that kind of situation but you're so fed up with all the shitty excuses, missed dates, late cold nights and frequent fights you two have.

“I'm done─ I'm so fucking done with this, Rachell! I cannot put up with you anymore─ your excuses, your bullshit, everything! And don't you fucking dare use Fed or any of your friends and your shitty games as an excuse! You're a grown woman─ not a motherfucking child! So act like it instead of pinning the blame on that asshole like a whiny bitch! I'M LEAVING!”

After that, she got up from her seat, begging you to stay as she apologized profusely, but you ignored her like she did to you─ and left her house, not giving a sign that you're alive for a full week.

And that week turned into months.

Nothing.

But she still sends you messages. Apologizing for her actions but even she knew that wasn't enough.
                

She had a chance...
                 

“Please, Y/n.” She mumbled, hugging you to death as she cried like there was no tomorrow.

You arrived one night, drenched head to toe from the storm outside, wanting nothing but to get your stuff and leave. But like you expected, she begged you, trying multiple ways to make you stay with her.

You blocked and ignored her as you packed up your clothes and other essentials with tears in your eyes. It hurts to see her again, after what you went through and you wanted nothing more than to leave the place and person that made you feel nothing.
                  

She HAD a chance...
                   

“I can't.” You growled, desperately trying to escape her, knowing that you'll give in the longer she does this. Even after leaving, after everything─ you still love her.

But this is a toxic relationship and you want outs.

“Just one night.” Her whole body trembled, prying her head away from the crook of your neck before pulling you into a passionate yet heated kiss.

As much as you tried to break free... to escape from her warm and soft lips, you submitted, needing this─ her, as well.

During the months that you left her, you found someone else. At the club, what you thought was a one-night stand, blossomed into something more. She made you feel as if you were her queen that deserves everything in this world. And you haven't felt that ever since Rae began busying herself with her friends and her ridiculous games.

Mia understood that you still love Rae. The brunette was your first everything.

First crush.

First kiss.

First time.

First love...

You felt guilty that you were kissing your ex, doing the dirty that you were supposed to do with only Mia, as well as taking advantage of the fact that your current girlfriend is extremely understanding. You knew that she would only tell you that it's alright, like this night was nothing and that you still love her, and you felt even more guilty that you're taking advantage of how understanding Mia truly was.

So the night, you two had sex─ not love.

It didn't─ and will never feel, like love to you.
                          

Rae knew that she had multiple chances to apologize to you properly, make it up to you...
                      

In the morning, the brunette thought that she would feel the same warmth that she longed for, but woke up to see nothing but paper on the nightstand.
                      

That night, instead of talking, you two did the deed...
                  

She broke in another set of tears when she read the words: You got what you wanted, are you happy now?
                        

And that's where she messed up, again.
                         

"Just one night" like you said, and i'm leaving for good.
            
           
          
         
        
         
         
       
          

── 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓮.
this got dark, omg.

this isn't the real rae, i guess you all know that by now. this is just my own angst imagine.

how was it though? okay? i hope so. I couldn't ask if you enjoyed this since... well..... you know.

that's it from me, and until the next update! take care!