Date: 19/03/2005
It is Saturday today and I was at home couldn’t think of going out. I thought I would read a letter from the satchel of a brave man.
I know society will have problem with me calling such a person brave, but I cannot call that person ‘a coward’ no matter how many theories you have to change my mind. Just because the person was defeated in the last battle you are not justified to call him coward. There were many wars you did not know. I do depreciate the act of committing suicide but cannot afford people entitling the person.
The letter today I read is attached below:
Dear God,
I am happy today because I found a friend. He is a doctor here and different from many people living here. He seems sensible when he is quiet but terrible when he pours questions on me. He reminds me of the schoolteacher who used to live in our colony. I don’t like his assistance because he always comes with injections; a way to kill other by just pricking. Easy slow poison…He keeps on sneaking when I don’t want to talk to him. The doctor knows that I am a university graduate therefore conversates on logical topics. Like the other day we had a discussion on the rockets and space shuttles. But there is one thing that I don’t approve and that is; he thinks that opening one’s heart is easy while I believe that it is the most difficult thing in life even more difficult than leaving your home… forever.
You know, today I ate burger after a long time, doctor bought it for me. We sat under the tree. I wonder how many before me have been there under the tree. Many people say time flies by, and it never remains the same. But, I think it is the same from the day I came to this place. Well, this place is not that bad because people here are sensible because they do not bully others. They have their own worlds of purity. I cannot be like them and never would, but I think they are easy goers. Thanks again for a friend because I never had any before.
Say Salam to mom and tell her that I am following her instructions given in the last letter. And by the way, the joke was great.
Wasif.
I am thinking that how difficult it becomes when you don’t have friends, however, I am very lucky to have Mariyah by my side.
Being a reporter, I want to read all the letters in a day. But there is something inside me that is insisting me to be patient. I don’t want to rip apart his tale all at once. And I don’t know why I am scared this time dealing with such a story. I have covered murder stories but this one seems different and difficult. I don’t want to treat it as a subject. Towards him, I don’t feel sympathy, it is empathy that is driving me towards the story. I have promised myself that I’ll never post his story in the paper. His story will stay here in my words and my world.
Today, I found another story when I was least expecting it. It was Mariyah who pointed it out. I was having breakfast when the doorbell rang accompanied with a chanting voice. At first, I could not understand who was on the door, but soon realized that begging is an easy profession adopted by many to earn as quickly as possible. I did not answer the beggar’s call and hoped that he would leave without making further fuss. Mariyah said, “Open the door, a new story is waiting for you.” At first, I didn’t get what she was referring to, but I opened the door and things clarified.
“Hey lady, I am waiting for so long and you are still staring at me without giving me anything. Please give me just one hundred rupees because I have never been to this place before. May God bless you with a peaceful life full of blessings and bounties.” It was a figure with a masculine voice wrapped in feminine clothes and the artistic ability was quite appreciable when I looked at the face. The facial skin was way deep under the façade of makeup. A broad smile and head scarf tugged behind ears was hiding the thin hairs on head. The tight-fitting suit on a tall torso was crimson colored. The lipstick was matched with the color of dress. When I looked down on the slippers; the delicate strips covered with dust were protecting heavy feet. The only answer that I could find in three silent minutes was, “Would you like to have some water?” she agreed with a queer smile.
I invited her inside and asked her to have a seat.
“I would pay you one thousand rupees if you would answer some of my questions just for a day.”
“Are you not afraid of me because you are all alone here? And the most important thing is that I cannot sacrifice my whole day for just 1000 rupees. I can earn way more than this.”
“Okay, just stay here for an hour. And I am not all alone, my friend is in the room studying.”
“What you want to ask, be quick because I do not have time today. I’ll come tomorrow, if it suits you.”
I agreed and now I am waiting what would happen tomorrow. I have prepared some questions for her. I would call her by the name she told me… she was called Deepika, inspired by a beautiful actress in Bollywood. In my whole life I was never dared to talk to eunuchs and today I successfully completed my first session. Fingers cross for next meeting.
It is 12:34 at night, I think I should try to sleep now. Dreams are also very important to take you away from reality and bring new sort of enthusiasm in life to tackle the problems. If not, then sometimes they are relaxing. However, for some time I am not able to sleep properly, maybe it is because I am relaxed these days and a lot of things are going on in my mind. Migraine can be the cause of this sleeplessness. Whatever, I think I have written enough for today.
Sweet dreams.
