Trigger Warning because of flashbacks. Other chapters will have worse flashbacks and it will be descriptive, but these are mainly just old statements said.
ALSO, like I said before, Kaine and Percy are extremely close so pls don't be like omg incest when they hug or anything like that-
Some of y'all don't have good relationships with your siblings and it shows ehfjdijfedfk-
Unedited
Percy hugged a large, stuffed animal to his chest, muffling his heavy breath and loud sobs. It was late, he didn't want to wake anyone, almost everyone was a light sleeper.
He thoughts were horrid, he could focus on anything else, they'd manage to push through.
"Stop fucking crying and suck it."
Percy didn't know how to make it all stop. He wanted it all to stop, he didn't know why everything was hitting all of a sudden.
"You wouldn't be so hard if you didn't like it. You're enjoying this."
Whimpers left his mouth, he clutched the soft, gentle stuffed animal, it brought little, but enough comfort.
His body trembling, his lip quivered. Snot and tears were running down his wobbling chin.
The voice echoed through his head, he wanted to puke. He wanted to shove knives in his ears so he could end the thoughts.
"Stop fucking moving and take it!"
Percy choked on his broken sobs, the voice and tone were so vivid. It was like a record playing, the phrases repeating.
"You know I'll always love you, more than anyone."
"I do everything for you."
"You couldn't live without me, you need me."
"I'll kill myself if you leave."
Percy sometimes wondered why. He wondered why he didn't realized sooner how awful he was. He wondered why he didn't listen to others telling him to break it off. He wondered why he let someone speak to him in such a way.
I want to cut.
You can't.
I want to. So badly. Just to distract myself. It's been so long.
Exactly, you can go long without it. It's bad enough you're smoking again.
Go wake up Kaine and lay with him until you calm down.
I want to cut.
I want to cut.
I want to cut.
Talk to Kaine.
Percy was conflicted. Conflicted if he should do what he wanted or what he needed. Both would lead to different things, one obviously better than the other.
I can do both.
No! Go to Kaine.
He's sleeping. I dont want to be annoying.
But you need someone right now.
I need to cut.
Percy squeezed the large plush to silence his thoughts, he just wanted to sleep. His head was pounding, he felt sick to his stomach from his roller coaster of thoughts.
