Our Love Could Be Lethal

Act II: New Rules

Song for the chapter is "Daisy," by Ashnikko. It is explicit but it's so-ooooo good.

Octavia's POV

Last night wasn't my finest moment. I can't remember the last time I actually cried when a Tribute died. As horrible as it sounds, I'd gotten quite used to it and to be perfectly honest, I prefer it that way. Not getting attached is the only way that you can make it out of this kind of thing with your sanity intact. Perhaps it's the fact that my brother's in these Games or the unusual sight of someone putting on a funeral within the Games themselves, but this time, the grief seems to have gotten to me.

When I think about it, I actually can retrace the last time I cried when a Tribute died, and it was Perseus. The confident and flirtatious boy who was overall just the good sort of happy-go-lucky type person. How he ended up volunteering for the Games, I'll never know. But then again, my brother also volunteered, so I guess even that sort of person can be misguided. 

I end up spending the night on floor 7 with both Finnick and Johanna, none of us really ready to separate because of potential nightmares and a part of some sort of unspoken agreement. I'm the first to wake up, and I tiptoe around the room. I spent the night on the floor next to Finnick, even though I originally shared Johanna's bed with her because she started to kick me in her sleep about halfway through the night.

I'm still in my clothes from the day before, but I don't really care. If I'm seen leaving Johanna's floor dressed the same as I was yesterday, it may even throw people off Finnick and I's scent even more.

I click the elevator button to take me down to the lobby and look down out of the glass elevator to try and get a glimpse of what awaits me. They had started the final eight interviews last night with Marvel's family and parents, but stopped once the action started back up so they could follow the Careers hunting Katniss. By the time Katniss' funeral for Rue was over, it was too late in the night to start back up again. So about anytime now, I should be getting some sort of interview about Cato.

When I make it to the lobby, I get my first glimpse of the television for that morning. Nearly all of the Tributes are asleep, except for Clove, who is on guard at the camp. Brutus will have gone to sleep despite my absence because Cato and Clove are in a pretty good spot. And no more will Cashmere and Gloss have to frequent the Command Centre because both of their Tributes are gone. Because of that fact, I expect the room to be empty.

But instead, one of the few people I don't want to see is still in there. Haymitch. He seems to have fallen asleep at his station, and he looks as bad as I must. But the doors sliding open jolts him awake. I don't want to tell Haymitch, but the words he told me on the opening day, after my conference with Seneca, are finally making sense to me. I finally understand what he means by remember who the real enemy is because the day he told me, I didn't really consider the idea; and instead, I threw it out of my head to focus on my brother.

Even though I need my brother to win these Games, it doesn't mean that I can't sympathize with Haymitch for the loss he'll inevitably feel when his Tributes don't come home. I can do everything I can for my brother, but that doesn't mean I have to like what he has to do.

Haymitch looks back to see who's entering, probably hoping that I'm Chaff, but instead turns back around when he sees it's just me. I walk to my station and sit down, getting my station ready and clearing off some of the clutter that had formed during the stressful hours of yesterday.

I usually don't mind silence, but this time it feels painful. So after a few moments, I finally speak up. "I remembered," is all I can manage to say. I hope he gets the reference I'm making. Anyone listening to the microphones they inevitably have in these rooms will have no idea what I'm talking about.