Hot Flash Fiction: Perimenopausal Musings

The Zoom of Doria Gray

"It began when Doria started fretting about the fact that she was beginning to show her age." The old woman puffed from her pipe and gave a chuckle revealing a mouth full of chipped yellow teeth. "And yes, you could say I was an acquaintance of hers, so to speak."

Sydney, exhausted from his hike through the forest to find this remote ramshackle cabin, looked the eclectic spinster up and down. Her appearance and the Alpine surroundings were a bad mashup of the 1980's and a Grimm's fairy tale. Clad in a pink velour sweat suit with a kerchief tied over wiry hair, her hunched frame leaned on an aluminum four-pronged cane. The faded thrift store price tag still hung from it.

"But are you sure you want to hear the whole story, love?" The crone gave him a crooked smile. "It isn't pretty."

Sydney shuddered as the hag placed a wrinkled hand, twisted with arthritic decay, upon his own smooth one. He sat tall in the chair she had insisted he rest upon bringing him eye to eye with his host. Her breath stank and one eye strayed disturbingly from her line of vision.

Sydney wanted nothing more than to flee from this ugly witch, but all clues had pointed to her and indeed she promised answers to the sudden disappearance of his fiancee three years ago. He had spent his every waking moment trying to track her down. He nodded his assent.

"It happened early in the pandemic," she continued, "her job involved eight or more hours online a day and many, many meetings over Zoom."

Sydney sighed, he remembered those tedious months all too clearly.

"She'd always been considered charming, beautiful and smart. Her career was a stunning success." Sydney agreed, she was indeed enchanting. He drifted off a bit into his imagined future with Doria.

"But online she didn't have the same charm and charisma. Her presence didn't have the same impact."

This part of the story didn't resonate with the Doria Sydney knew. He looked at the old woman, puzzled.

"And her dating life tanked," said the old woman. "She'd met people online before, but she'd always stuck to the sage advice of meeting in person as soon as possible. There's no other way to know if there is chemistry between two people. Once men met her, they loved her."

Sydney felt bashful now. Because of the pandemic, his relationship with Doria had all been online. It hadn't stopped him from proposing though.

"She blamed her failure on Zoom and tried everything to improve her appearance: different lighting, brighter colored clothes, different backgrounds. Finally a co worker, a bubbly popular girl named Henrietta, gave her a piece of advice that would change her life forever."

A sinking feeling built in Sidney's stomach.

"Henrietta told her about the Touch up my appearance feature on Zoom. It worked a bit, but it wasn't enough." The old woman leaned in close to Sydney and her voice dropped an octave. "The quest for beauty is a slippery slope, Sydney."

He fidgeted uneasily in his chair.

"What Zoom couldn't provide, a deal with the devil could," said the hag with a laugh. "You should always meet your girlfriends in person Sydney. Want a kiss?"

Sydney ran as fast as could away from the woman's hut, her cackle echoing behind him through the tall trees.