Chapter 41
Heart pumping, breathing erratic and mind swirling with millions of thoughts, Jin dashed down the corridor, skipping the elevator as it was in use, towards the emergency stairs. Racing down the numerous flights of stairs, only looking forward as he manoeuvred around the other workers and visitors that were using the stairs like him, he landed on the ground floor, immediately pulling open the fire door to find himself out in the spacious lobby. His eye's flickered over the plethora of heads, slightly frustrated that today out of all the days the place was filled. But when he noticed a familiar hoodie out in the patio through the row of large glass windows situated behind the indoor plants, he released a breath of relief as he made his way to the door leading to the space.
Body slightly relaxing now that he knew that neither woman had left the building, he made his way through the door out to the coldness of the night. Closing the door behind him so no one would intrude on their conversation, he slowly made his way over to the crouched figures. Not wanting to scare them or intrude on the conversation they were having, he made his presence known by calling their names from the distance. He watched as the two swung their heads around to look at him, before Mia quickly disappeared from sight as she merged with the shadow created by the tree's.
Stopping in front of the pair, Jin turned towards Amy with a gentle smile before glancing at Mia, whose figure was barely visible in the moonlight. "Can you leave the two of us to talk please Amy?" Jin asked softly, though he knew he wouldn't leave even if she refused. "That-" "Please. I just need to talk to her for a minute. If we aren't back in about 5 minutes then you can come back." Jin interrupted her, quickly silencing her as his eyes remained on the shadow behind her.
He watched as Amy turned towards Mia, no words being exchanged between the two verbally but Jin could see the heated conversation happening between them. Though no words left their mouths, their body posture and stiff movements were more than enough of an indicator for Jin to see that the two were arguing about his request. He was almost certain it was Mia who wanted nothing to do with the conversation.
But after a few long minutes, Amy turned back to him, a soft smile on her face as she detached Mia's desperate hand around her arm before walking away. "I'll give you 10 minutes. Not a second more." She shouted before walking through the door to the lobby without looking back. Jin inwardly thanked her before turning around to look at Mia. But when he turned around, he had noticed that Mia was no where to be found.
Looking around frantically, the time ticking on the clock, his eye's caught onto her running figure far off in the distant. The last thought on his mind was wondering how she was able to get so far in the few seconds he had turned around, as he instantly followed after her. He knew from personal experience that calling out her name would just frighten her and make her more reluctant to stop and talk, so he shadowed after her quietly even though he knew that times was of the essence.
However, luckily for him, Mia soon slowed down to a walk as she came to the end of the patio and to the east gate. He could see the clear panic on her face that was illuminated by the light of the moon as she looked around for another escape route. But Jin being one of the occupant's of the area knew that there was no where she could run apart from the way she came, which he was stood in. So though he felt like he was trapping a frightened animal in a cage, he walked towards her slowly and spoke quickly before she could get the chance to try and pass him.
"I'm sorry." The apology fell from his lips effortlessly, causing Mia to freeze in her spot, her eyebrows cutely furrowed as she looked at Jin for the first time since she left the room. Jin noted the remnants of tears on her cheeks, which pulled at his heartstrings weirdly enough, and the evident facial expression of confusion.
"Why are you apologising?" Mia whispered out, her voice slightly muffled as she held her hand to her face, attempting to cover as much of her face as possible. She hated people seeing her cry and Jin was no exception. "I'm apologising for what happened in there and for what I'm about to do."
Mia was even more confused by what Jin had just said, her whole head cocking to the side slightly as she asked Jin to elaborate, "What you're about to do? What do you-" But she didn't get far with her question before Jin's body disappeared from infront of her, the apartment complex in the distance appearing before as her head rested on a shoulder.
Long arms wrapped around her waist, pushing her body flush against his own as one hand travelled up to her hair stroking it gently, his warm breath causing goose-bumps to litter over her skin. Mia tried to ignore his breath that fanned on her cold ear as she moved her hands to his chest, attempting to push him away. But as she tried to pull herself out of embrace, he didn't move. In fact, his arms seemed to enclose around her even tighter the more she moved.
"Jin, let go!" She exclaimed, wanting to get out of the one sided hug. It wasn't that she couldn't push him away if she wanted to, rather if she did put her whole strength in her push the likelihood of Jin getting injured was high. A consequence she didn't want to face.
"I'm not going to let go. Just listen to me." Jin stands firm to his words, further tightening his arms around Mia's waist, no matter how flustered he felt himself. He held onto her not matter how much she wiggled and pulled at his arms to free herself, just silently holding her until she stops moving and fell silent in his arms, two single sentences shaking her to the core; her body becoming stiff as a walking cane. "You don't need to be afraid. You're not alone."
Silence surrounded the two as Mia remained in her thoughts and Jin prepared himself for what he was about say. Neither moved from the hug, Jin's arms still around Mia's waist whilst hers remained against her still body. But it wasn't long before the silence and distance between the two shrivelled away as Mia whispered out a quiet, "Why?"
Her body fell slack against Jin's in exhaustion. She had lost any motivation to move away from him as the words he had spoken played constantly in her head, the guilt for the way she was avoiding everything drowning her. "Why won't you let me go?" Her voice comes out even more quieter than before, Jin hearing the crack at the end as he raises his hand again to stroke her hair. He knew that it was comforting her, not just because of the bond, but because of the way she melted into his figure, no longer tense or alert.
"Because I know how you feel." He starts, his hand on Mia's head stopping her from looking up at him to rebut his comment. It wasn't that he was trying to stop her from speaking, rather it was to stop her from looking at him because he knew that this confidence that he held was only going to last so long before it would shrink.
"As weird as it sounds, when you looked at me in the room I saw myself in your eyes." Jin began, the rhythm of his words slow and steady. "I could see the same fear that haunts me today deep within you. And because of that, I couldn't let you go knowing that you were sinking in the same pool that I have drowned in many times. Though our reasons might differ, we both held the same feeling of fright and helplessness, and seeing that made me want to reach out and help-"
"What if I don't want your help?" Mia interrupts Jin, catching him off guard; he had never expected to get such a question from her. As naïve as it sounded, Jin thought by opening up slightly, Mia would understand that he wasn't someone like the tyrants that she had unfortunately accounted, but someone she could lean on. But Jin never once took in the possibility that Mia had already been fed similar words like his own and was far from letting herself from leaning on to him.
"Then think of it as you helping me. I'm doing this for my own demons as well." Jin admitted, sighing in defeat as he threw away the mental notes he had made when he convinced himself to approach Mia. The well thought out words he had planned weren't going to work against Mia, so Jin decided to get rid of them and instead say what he wanted to say without worrying about the consequences. "I know the reasons behind my scars, and I'm sure you know the reasons behind yours and as hard as it is to admit, this fear is one of the buds that connect to the root of my scars. I'm not sure how this bond works and this may only scrape the top of what the truth is behind my scar, but I'm willing to let you in if you promise to do the same, even if it's not now but somewhere in the future."
"What do you mean?" Mia asks despite the fact she already knew where Jin was going with this. "I want us to be honest with each other. At the end of the day, we both know that both of us are hiding something that is clearly holding us back, whether or not we try to deny it, our scars are proof of that. And as cliché as this sounds, that's okay because it's what make us human. No one's going to hate you for having weaknesses and if they do, then they are a**holes." Jin spat, catching Mia by surprise. Jin feels the surprise emit from her due to his choice of words, causing a small chuckle to leave his lips.
Jin being too busy chuckling, missed the way Mia froze as a her left shoulder containing the word 'Hyung' sizzles slowly, awakening to an unwanted sensation throughout her body. It was the first time Mia had felt such a feeling rush through her body, her mind and soul zoning out from the world around as that same patch of skin continued to burn, almost like it was in agreement with Jin's words. It wasn't until the sweet vibrations from Jin's voice outweighed the tingles, hitting the exact sensitive spot, was she able to return back from her moment of darkness.
"Anyway, I want to come to a compromise."
"A compromise?" Mai whispered out, still highly confused about what had happened.
"Yeah, and it'll be just between the two of us, if that's okay? It's not going to be written in any contract nor do you need to accept it, it's just I've been doing some thinking today and I think this might benefit us both." Jin explains, finally letting Mia out of his embrace as he looks at her straight on for the first time.
Jin and Mia both freeze momentarily, both pairs of eyes widening as they take in the distance between them, only now realising how close and intimate they were. The last time they were this close was early in the morning when Jin found Mia passed out side the company. At that time the distance was the last thing on eithers mind as they were literally battling to stay alive, but this time it was avoidable- they didn't need to be this close.
"We might want to hurry. It's probably been about 10 minutes." Mia coughed out as she snapped out of her daze, a daze that only melted away once she had surveyed Jin's whole face and he had done the same to hers. And for once the duo both silently agreed as they stepped back away from each other, that they had landed themselves with someone truly breath taking, slightly disheartened by the fact their relationship was due to the bond and nothing more. However, that thought didn't last long in Mia's mind, nor Jin's when he saw Mia's face turn sour, when she was reminded that this was all platonic. They were both using each other to rid off their scars and then will go separate ways. He was her soulmate: something she truly despised.
And so when Jin and her started making their way back to BTS' dorm, Mia could barely listen to Jin's idea whilst her mind swirled with one thought:
He was her soulmate. And soulmates are corrupt.
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This has got to be the hardest chapter I have EVER wrote. You have no idea how many times I had to start all over again despite knowing what I had to write. And I dont even know why it was so either. Still not 100% happy with it but it's better than my last 9 tries :) 10 times the charm they say.