I stood at my locker, putting away my textbooks from third period and shoving my homework into my backpack, which I then slung back over my shoulder. A week had passed since the first open field, but Madi's hate for me had only intensified. I rarely saw her during the day, but she ran infield practice, and she never hesitated to make my life difficult. During drills, we would take turns at different positions, practicing different scenarios, and Madi would stand at home plate and hit balls to us. I played shortstop most of the time, and it was obvious that she was giving me the hardest hits, trying to get me to mess up. She would hit the ball right up the middle, forcing me to dive, then immediately after she would hit a lazy pop fly into No Man's Land between third and left so I had to sprint to make a sliding catch. By the time drills were over I would be out of breath and sweating. But I took great satisfaction in the results I made play after play, knowing that Madi's attempts to knock me out of the game were just making me look better.
So I didn't dread going to practice, and I wasn't scared to face Madi on the field again. In fact, I rarely even thought about her while I was in classes.
All I could think about was Ari.
She had been occupying my mind ever since we had what I considered a moment last week, but I hadn't had an opportunity to pursue it further. It was driving me crazy. What had she thought when she was looking into my eyes for those few seconds?
I shook my head and slammed the door to my locker and started walking to my Pre-Calc class. I was sure I was overthinking. But why? I never thought about a girl this much. Usually even the thought of them got boring after a while, and eventually I just forgot.
But for some reason, Ari was different.
I just had no idea if that was good or bad.
"Hey, Soph, wait up!"
I turned around. Alyssa was coming toward me. "You forgot to wait for me," she said breathlessly.
"Sorry, I was just distracted," I replied. We had been walking together since the first day, seeing as we had all our classes together.
"Hey, I'm sorry about last week. I know I should've said something, but I was just..." she trailed off and looked away, blushing.
"I get it," I said, "I do. I don't hold grudges about the little stuff."
"Really?" she said.
I nodded. "Yeah. To be honest, I hadn't even thought about it."
She eyed me curiously. "Why not? You ok?"
I looked down. "Yeah, just thinking about practice tonight," I lied.
Her expression softened a bit. "Hey, don't worry about Madi. As long as Ari's there she won't pull anything else."
I looked back up at that. "Why? I thought she was like team captain, El Jefe, or whatever."
Alyssa laughed a little, but shook her head. "Madi could never win team captain. Ari's the best player on the team. She already has full ride offers from Ohio State, Tennessee, and Florida. She was the fastest pitcher in our entire league last year, and that was as a junior."
"Holy shit." I was really impressed. Those were colleges I could only dream of playing for. Especially with my grades, which, I reflected, were less than admirable.
"She's also the best power hitter I've ever seen. Not that I've seen many, but," Alyssa continued.
"Still," I finished.
We reached our Pre-Calc class and took seats at our table in the back. She leaned over to me and whispered, "I think she likes you though."
My heart lept. "Really?"
Alyssa nodded. "I've never seen her intervene when Madi pulls shit before. Usually she just keeps her distance and tries not to make a big deal about it. But she also doesn't like very many people. Guess you're just special," she added.
I stared out the window, intrigued. "Guess so."
The small voice in the back of my head was hopeful. Maybe I wasn't overthinking, it said. But I sighed. In my 16 years' experience, I'd learned that when I hoped for something, no matter how much I wanted it, it usually didn't turn out. Yet I still clung to the hope that maybe what Alyssa said was true; that I was different.
Either way, I finally had something interesting to think about during Pre-Calc.
---
The last bell of the day rang, jolting me awake. I had fallen asleep in my seventh period Bio class. Again. But it seemed like half the class was in the same post-nap stupor that I was.
Could you really blame us?
I picked up my backpack and practically sprinted back to my locker to put my extra books away. I moved to slam it shut and get down to the gym to change, but I found my path blocked.
"Jesus Christ Ryan stop doing that!"
He smirked slightly. We had only exchanged a few quick words at our lockers since the first week of school, and I guess this was his way of getting me to talk with him. But I didn't have time for it.
I tried to push past him, but he stepped sideways to block my path. I sighed. "I have to get to the locker rooms, so if you could move, I'd really appreciate it."
Ryan raised an eyebrow. "Much more polite today."
I rolled my eyes. "I figured I'd try the diplomatic approach before I needed to use my second option."
"And what option would that be?"
"Shoving you onto the ground and walking around you."
He laughed. "You're pretty funny."
I crossed my arms over my chest. "You think I wouldn't?"
"Oh I know you would. I was giving you a compliment. You're genuinely funny."
I was honestly a little confused. I didn't think a guy like Ryan would be humble enough to actually give me a compliment and mean it. Maybe his head wasn't as big as I thought.
"Thanks, I guess, but I really have to go," I said, managing to shoulder him aside. He didn't try to grab me like last time, which I was thankful for, but before I had gone a few steps he called out, "Wait!"
I stopped, turned around and eyed him impatiently. "What now?"
"I never caught your name."
I smiled slightly. In spite of my best efforts, Ryan was starting to grow on me.
"Soph," I said.
A somewhat triumphant smile lit up his features. "Nice to officially meet you, Soph."
Then he turned and walked back to his locker. I studied him for a second, then I remembered I had somewhere to be. And by now I was five minutes later than I usually was, meaning all the girls would likely be in the locker room already.
Great.
I walked quickly down the now-empty hallways towards the gym. I pushed open the door, hearing chatter and laughter from the girls' side. I took a deep breath, preparing myself to walk in. I reached out for the handle--
BAM!
"What the hell-- OH SHIT I'm sorry are you ok?"
Somebody had opened the door to the locker room from the inside, and the hard wood slammed into my nose. I closed my eyes and doubled over in pain as I heard the exclamation. I could feel the blood start to drip out of my left nostril. I reached up, plugging my nose to stop the bleeding, and winced in pain. The bridge of my nose was already extremely tender. I knew that once the bleeding stopped it would probably bruise and start to swell. My vision was somewhat blurry as I looked, but I saw that it was Ari standing above me, concerned etched on her face.
I let go a short bark of pained laughter. "I'm good. Hurts like a bitch, though."
Ari smiled slightly, but I could see she was worried that she'd hurt me bad. She reached over to support me, putting an arm around my shoulders as I tried to stand up and started to walk into the locker room. We walked past the three rows of blue gym lockers where the other girls were changing. They looked at me, some of them concerned, others indifferent. I swear I saw Madi hide a smirk before Alyssa called out anxiously, "Soph are you ok?"
I heard Ari answer, "Yeah, I think she's fine," but my knees gave out as the room started spinning. I would've collapsed without her supporting me.
"Whoa, you need to get to the trainer's or something--" Ari began, but I interrupted.
"Nah, I-I'm fine, I just gotta sit down," I said, still extremely dizzy.
She looked at me dubiously, but continued to practically carry me to a more private corner of the locker room and sat me in a rolling office chair. I realized this was the coach's office. As soon as she let go of me, my body sighed, and I realized how much I had actually been enjoying having her arm around me.
Wait, what was I thinking? I shook my head to clear the thought, but then I coughed involuntarily as blood from my nose started draining into my throat.
Ari had been standing awkwardly in the doorway, like she didn't know what she should be doing, but she looked up when she heard me. "You need anything?"
I hesitated. She had already helped me enough, but I knew I couldn't get up on my own right now. "Can you grab me some paper towels?"
She nodded, turning around to go into the nearby bathroom. I put my head back temporarily to stall the dripping of blood onto the floor while she was gone. My head was still pounding slightly, but at least the room had stopped spinning. I heard the tearing of paper towels nearby, and I winced at the thought of the rough, sandpaper-like textured paper I knew was coming.
I heard footsteps coming back towards the office, and I realized the rest of the locker room had gone silent. The rest of the girls had probably left for the field already. I shifted slightly and looked at the clock to my right. It was already 3:00, and open fields were supposed to start at 3:15.
I turned my gaze back over to the doorway as Ari appeared, a stack of brown paper towels in her hand. She handed them to me, and I took two and held them over my nose, leaning my head forward again. She remained in the office, so I looked at her again.
"You should go. You're gonna be late."
She shook her head and walked over to sit on the desk. "Not until I know you're ok."
I looked at her curiously as she swung her legs, like a little kid. She stared off at nothing. I wondered what she was thinking about.
I wondered equally what she would think about what I was thinking.
We continued to sit in silence for a little while before she said, practically reminiscently, "You know, it's funny, because that's pretty much exactly how I broke my nose."
She must've seen the alarm on my face as I started freaking out, so she hastily added, "But I don't think you did. Trust me, when I broke mine I was in so much pain I could barely stand, much less walk."
I exhaled again, and relaxed my shoulders. "Thank god."
Ari nodded, but didn't say anything, so I asked, "When did you break your nose?"
"When I was twelve. I was at my grandpa's house for Easter and I was going to open the bathroom door, but I didn't realize my mom was already in there, and, well..." she trailed off, gesturing to me. "And my nose has been crooked ever since."
"I like it," I said immediately.
She gave me a weird look, and I added hurriedly, "I mean, it suits you."
"Oh," she said, still gazing at me. "Thanks."
Our eyes remained locked. I didn't reply. My throat was dry, and I could feel the tension rising between us.
I felt a small bead of blood start to drip out of my nose, but I didn't have any paper towels left, and I didn't want to break the tension just yet.
But Ari saw it and started out of her trance. "Shit, here."
She jumped down from the desk and walked over to me. She leaned down and carefully wiped the blood away. I felt a familiar sting as the paper towel ran over the area rubbed raw, but I wasn't focused on that.
Ari's face was less than two inches from mine, our noses nearly touching, eyes locked on each other's once more. A lump rose in my throat. She was so close to me, and suddenly I felt a nearly irresistible desire to bridge the small gap between us. My stare flicked from her eyes to her lips, then back up. I noticed her hands, one on the arm of the chair, another still holding the paper towel beneath my nose. I had never felt such a strong pull to another girl before, and it scared me and excited me all at once. I didn't want it to end.
But suddenly it was over.
"I-I need to go," Ari said, backing up quickly, throwing the now bloody paper towel into a nearby trash can. I nodded. I knew that in my condition there was no way I would be able to go to open field today.
"I'll tell everyone you're not coming," she finished.
"Y-yeah, um, okay--" I started.
She was almost out of the locker room when I called out, "Ari, wait!"
I heard her footsteps stop and grow louder as she walked back.
"Thanks."
She smiled at me. "Anytime."
I returned the smile, ignoring the slight pain in my nose as my face contorted. Ari turned, grabbed her stuff, and walked out of the locker room.
I heard the door shut, and I was left in the coach's office, alone with my thoughts again.