I'm so fucking paranoid and I've only been here for 2 days. Jordan has been blowing up my phone with texts and calls that I won't answer or respond to.
"Hey, I got something to do real quick. I'll be back, okay?" Nelson said as he stood outside of the room.
I dont want him to leave cause I dont wanna be alone. I'm scared that Jordan will find me.
I closed my eyes. "Okay."
"You sure?" I nodded. "Okay." He said before walking downstairs. I heard the front door shut.
I ran around the house making sure all the windows and doors were locked. I took a deep breath and then my phone rang. I answered it without looking.
"Hello." I said out of breath
"Marianna, where the hell are you?!??"
I didn't say anything. I just stood there in silence.
"Bring o ass home. Matter of fact, where the fuck you at cause I'mma come get you?"
I took a deep breath. "I ain't tellin' you where the fuck I've been staying! I left you. We're done. Leave me the hell alone!"
"Left me?" He chuckled. "I own you, baby. And you will be coming home." He sighed, he also does that before he tries to calmly convince me to do what he wants. "Baby, come home, please. I miss you."
"No!" I hung up. "So damn bipolar."
I ran upstairs and looked out the window. I sat on the bed and started tapping my fingering on the headboard. I know he's gonna find me. I know he's gonna be mad. I know he's gonna beat my ass. I just don't know when.
He doesn't have a good relationship with his family, so he doesn't want me to have a good relationship with mine. My relationship with my family has never was been good though. Me and my brother have an okay relationship.
I have to leave. I just should go back to him. Maybe things won't be as hard for me if I just go back. I cried into my hands.
I heard the front door open.
"Marianna!" Nelson yelled
I got up and wiped my tears before I walked downstairs.
"Hey, what's up?" I said with a smile.
"You hungry?" He asked as he sat started pulling food out of this brown paper bag. "You haven't really eaten much since you've been here."
"No, I-"
"I haven't seen you eat since you got here." He said as he gently pulled me into the kitchen. "I got your favorite; a baked potato with cheese and bacon, steak, and broccoli. You're probably gonna be on the toilet tonight, but it's okay. I also brought toilet paper." He said while smiling as he held up two rolls of toilet paper.
I laughed before sitting down at the table.
***
I woke up the next morning and took a shower.
I dried off and put on some lotion. I don't plan on going anywhere so I put on a pink sports bra and some black shorts. I flat ironed my hair then laid down. I decided to watch The Real.
Nelson walked into the room.
"Tamara and Adrienne so fine." He said
I laughed and rolled my eyes. "You wouldn't know what to do with them."
"Yeah, aight. I have them both cheating on they niggas." He said making me laugh again. "Mom asked me to come over and I was wondering if you wanted come?"
"No." I calmly said.
He shook his head. "You gotta learn how to let shit go. She changed."
Then I started thinking about Jordan.
"Every time I let something go, it comes back and bites me in the ass. I'm sick and tired of dealing with people who clearly don't give a damn about me."
He sighed "Okay. I gotta admit, what she made you do was pretty fucked up. But, she was on drugs. And what she said to you wasn't right at all....look, I don't know. Only she can tell you. Not me." He kissed my forehead and then walked out.
I got up and started pacing.
I was knocked out of my thoughts by someone putting their hand over my mouth. I started kicking as they dragged me out of the room. They dragged me out and put me in the backseat of a car faced down. I heard them get in and then the door shut. The car started moving.
"Didn't I tell you to come home, Mari?" I heard Jordan say in my ear. He sat me up and made me look at him as he wrapped his hands around my throat. "You shouldn't have left, baby. And to top it all off, you disrespected me over the phone." He chuckled while shaking his head.
"I'm sorry-"
He placed his finger on my lips. "No need to apologize. If you value your life, you'll make it up to me when we get home."
The whole car ride I was expecting him to hit me, but he didn't. I would break eye contact with him and he's lightly slap my thigh and demand that I look him in his eyes. Once we got to the house, he carried me inside and up to our room. He sat me on the bed.
"Take your clothes off." He said as he walked into our closet. I followed his instructions and waited for him to walk back out. He came back out with handcuffs. "Don't be so nervous, baby. You'll like this." He chuckled before handcuffing me to the headboard.
He placed my legs on his shoulders before he began flicking his tongue. I tried to move but he pulled my hips closer to his face so I couldn't. I'd be lying if I said I didn't like it. He kept flicking his tongue and moving it in a circle. I refused to moan his name.
"Jordan, I—." I moaned
"Hold it."
I nodded even though I knew I couldn't. I came in his mouth. His licked everything clean.
Keeping my legs on his shoulders, he entered me. Making me feel every stroke. He loved watching me refuse to moan his name. It was another way of torturing me.
He untied me and flipped me over. He entered me from behind.
"Who" he smacked my ass "Was" smack "You" smack "Dis" smack "Re" smack "Specting" smack "Last" smack "Night?" smack
"I'm sorry!" I cried as he picked me up and slowly sat me down on him. I started riding him. He groaned as he held me in place before releasing.
"Get on yo knees and bend over." He demanded.
I did what he said and then he rammed himself into me. He pulled my hair as he went.
"What's my name?"
"Jordan."
He smacked my ass with his free hand.
"Wrong."
"Daddy." He slowed down and we both finished together. I turned around and he kissed me. He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around him.
He turned the shower on and we both got in. We kissed. The kiss with rough but slow and passionate. I pulled away and looked down at his chest. I placed my hand on his heart.
He lifted my chin up with his index finger.
"Leave me again, and I'm not gonna be this nice." He said and I nodded. "I'm sorry, baby. I love you."
He kissed me again. He lightly bite my bottom lip as he pulled away.
"Turn around." He said
I turned around and he kissed my shoulder. He washed my body.
"I'm sorry for all the pain I brought to your body. I didn't mean to do the shit that I did. You my everything." He whispered in my ear
I weakly smiled. After he washed my body and I washed his body we dried off, put on some lotion and then laid down.
"This ain't over wit, shawty. You gotta suck my dick later." He said making me laugh even though I knew he was serious.
"Who's house was that?" He asked me as he caressed my cheek and looked in my eyes.
"My brother's."
"You stayed at yo brother's house?!?!" He yelled
"Yes." I said with my eyes closed. He sighed.
"Ion have time to deal with this shit. I'll be back." He got up.
"Where are you going?"
"Come on." He said as he held his hand out. I took his hand without hesitation."You can gimme that head you owe me on the ride there." He said before smacking my butt.