Chapter 23
Several days had past, and Rebekah had just been going to Kade's house and getting intoxicated during the day rather than going to school. It was pointless. She'd come to the conclusion that there was nothing there for her, and Rebekah really couldn't be dealing with Kyra and the rest of that clang. She knew they'd know she was with Kade, but she honestly couldn't care less.
Ethan hadn't been with them. He'd disappeared off somewhere, and Rebekah refused to think about it. Well, she tried.
The other day. That day when she stopped contemplating whether she had feelings for him, and admitted it to herself, was the day she had to reach level one hundred and completely turn her emotions off. She'd even been taking Cocaine off Kade to help these feelings sink back down where they belonged. Where nobody would ever find them, and boy did it work.
The drug also helped with the self-hatred Rebekah had, had ever since she stepped foot into this house. Prevented the disgust she felt about herself when she willingly slept with Kade. Pushed away the guilt that she had for allowing him to get away with murder. Turned off the shame when she was thinking about taking the drug before she even took it. As soon as that substance was snorted up, she forgot to think about all those things that consumed her mind and ate her whole. Forgot to think about where on earth Ethan Riley could be. School? Dead?
Rebekah thought it was curing her, but it only made things worse in the long run. Because when it left her body, she was left with more heart-wrenching, vile truths than ever before.
That's why she didn't allow it to die off.
Now, Rebekah was sat in Kade's living room, lay across his arm chair. He was on that grey sofa off his, and she assumed he was asleep.
Her mind was spinning due to the fact she'd just drank a bottle of spirits straight, and her eyes kept closing shut. The television wasn't even playing to create some sound. It was the silence that was making her tired too.
Her rattling hand reached out and grabbed her phone, and she had four missed calls from her dad. She rolled her eyes and threw the phone back down. He'd only want to know her whereabouts.
All of a sudden, there was a large noise, and Rebekah's body jerked up from the chair. It had erupted loudly in her ears because of the lack of noise in the room. She reckoned it was probably Kade's dad coming home from work. God knows what the time even was.
As soon as she stood up, her body stumbled, and she nearly went straight forwards. She straightened her posture, realising she was wearing little to non clothes. She was in just a black t-shirt that Kade had gave her after sex before. Rebekah didn't seem to care, and went to walk out the room. She was that drunk, she seriously planned on opening the door to Kade's dad. Or was it Kade's dad she was hoping for..
When she reached the living room door, she heard movement behind her, and Rebekah rocked as she turned back.
She swung around, nearly falling again, and Kade's black eyes were on her. The room was pretty dark, but the light from the window caused them to be in view as he stared directly at her, the pupil becoming wider, stretching the brown in them with each moment that gaze was on her.
Those eyes followed her everywhere.
" What are you doing?" His voice was thick with sleep and alcohol. You could tell he'd woke up more bladdered than he'd fell asleep.
Her vision shifted as she stared at him. "There's someone at the door,"
Kade got up, struggling as the gin he'd drank weighed him back down. " Ignore it, they'll go away."
" It might be your dad," Rebekah slurred. " The doors locked, an' he.. he can't get in." But really, Rebekah was thinking it could be someone else.. She'd never tell Kade that- even with the spirits still roaming around her body.
" Just leave it," he pushed, and wobbled over to Barr that was opened in his living room.
The door hadn't rang again away.
Rebekah listened, sitting back down on the floor for some reason, but she could feel those dark eyes of Kade's on her. He'd acted so strange these past few days. Less angry. Not happy by any means. But less angry. It wasn't as easy for Rebekah to see emotion within Kade like it was with Ethan, which is the reason she assumed he didn't have ordinary feelings like any other.
Well, of course he didn't. He'd murdered someone, and not lost a wink of sleep at night.
So she thought..
Rebekah was knocked from her minds ideas by something being shoved towards her, and when she brought her sunken eyes up, Kade was swaying side to side, holding two cups of Gin in his hands.
Rebekah took one, giving him a sloppy smile, and quickly brought the cup to her lips. Surprisingly, Kade sat down next to her on the ground. The room was still black, and it seemed too closed in for just the two of them.
Kade slid a bit more closer to her, his eyes wandering around, and Rebekah's mind was clueless. She knew he was about to say something, but he was too near for even the comfort of her current state.
" Rebekah, I need- " but he was cut off by noise, and Rebekah and Kade's ears twitched at the sound of the door being messed with, and Rebekah got back up off the floor again at the sound- almost in a hurry. Kade did the same, like he wasn't allowed to be near her.
" I said leave it," Kade repeated, his voice was much louder and demanding this time.
Old Kade again.
Or was he acting up because he knew someone was there?
Rebekah had stepped closer to the living room door, by the time he'd said this, but it didn't matter because whoever was there had opened the door with a key; she could hear the jingling of the key rings clashing together, and then the low creak of the door opening.
She whipped her head back to Kade, and his eyebrows were furrowed in confusion. Rebekah knew hers was the same, and when she turned back around, her heart was knocked into her ribcage at the sight of Ethan in front of her, and she felt it sink like a deflated balloon into her stomach.
He was dangling a set of keys between his fingers, and his green eyes latched onto Rebekah's; she was right in front of him. So close. A little too close. Rebekah noticed that hint of emotion in his eyes in that second they shared off eye contact, but Rebekah watched as the balls in his sockets roamed down to her half naked body, and his expression now appeared disgusted, but sadly disgusted at the sight of her. Almost like he couldn't believe this.
He reached eyes with her again, and Rebekah felt like she couldn't breathe. The sight of him making her feel this way that she didn't want to feel. The way she'd finally admitted she did. That way caused her to also feel nauseous and not okay. But their moment was broken into two by the big bad Monster who prevented her from opening up. Kade always appeared The Monster when Ethan was around.
" What are you doing here?" Kade slurred.
Ethan tore his eyes from Rebekah's, a flat expression on his face, and it seemed like he'd teared a piece of Rebekah's heart whilst doing so. " What am I doing here?" Ethan repeated, raising a brow. " Where have you been for three days?"
Ethan now moved out the way of the door, his shoulder barging Rebekah's as he did so, and she stayed facing the hallway as Kade and Ethan spoke, her face still drooping with that melancholy feeling that entered her body without an invite. She didn't even know why she was upset. Must've been the booze heightening her emotions.
" We don't go to school anymore," Kade's croaky, intoxicated voice sniggered and Rebekah turned around to see a smirk on his face.
" Well, get fined then. I don't care." Ethan shrugged, still maintaining that moody tone, and it was damaging Rebekah to see him so pissed off. She was just assuming he was mad at her because she'd had something to drink. She hadn't seen him in days, and she hated seeing him so distant. Not like he was ever not.
" Heyyy, chillax, Ethan," Kade nudged, pushing a glass what he'd grabbed of the side towards him. He was rocking too and fro. " Have a drink with us."
" Don't want one," Ethan bluntly replied.
Kade scoffed. " Fine, have it your way," he downed the glass of gin he'd offered to Ethan.
Rebekah was messing with the end of Kade's black shirt to stop her from eying their conversation. She felt embarrassed right now whilst he was present.
Kade dropped back on the sofa, making a large noise, and Rebekah looked over at him from the ground. " If you're gonna stay and be boring, keep it down. I have a pounding headache."
Ethan ignored him, and Rebekah watched as Kade's eyes were fluttering shut. " I'm not going sleep though. No, I'm not going sleep," Ethan furrowed his eyebrows then tutted at Kade; he was drunk, and talking nonsense that he could barely understand. He didn't even know why he'd came here.
Oh, but he did..
Kade got comfortable, and Ethan walked towards the bar. Rebekah's eyes followed him, watching his every move, and she noticed him pull out his phone. He typed on it for a few minutes, and she examined as a small smile lifted onto his face. What was that for?
The room was eery, and all that could be heard was Ethan's fingers tapping against the small buttons of his mobile. It began to irritate Rebekah, and she beaded her eyes, clenching her fingernails into her palm, deepening the scars that already coated her skin. Why wasn't he talking to her? He was being really rude. It was the booze causing this frustration, and she knew how ridiculous her thoughts were, but Rebekah couldn't help it.
Soon enough, light snores could be heard coming from Kade, and Rebekah let out a breath. She supposed it was good that he was sleeping it off; he might act differently towards her now that Ethan's here, and she'd gotten use to the calm, collected side.
Her head jerked to the side when she heard Ethan get up off the stool, and walk towards the kitchen sink. He grabbed a cup and began pouring himself a glass of water, and Rebekah's eyelids seemed to close in slow-motion as they stuck to his actions.
The air was still, and it was so awkward. The sound of Ethan's cup hitting against the shelf only intensified the rooms atmosphere. Rebekah didn't know why it was this weird, but it was.
Ethan took large, dramatic steps into the living room, letting out poofs through his mouth to create some source of noise to ease the strangeness they both felt.
Soon enough- surprising Rebekah, he took a seat next to her on the floor, but he made sure to keep a distance and didn't dare look her way. Rebekah eyed the side of his face like it was the most precious, saddest thing she'd ever seen, and her blood-shot eyes softened as she noticed the dark circles beneath his bottom lashes, and the paleness about his skin.
He still stared forwards, and Rebekah turned her head in shame. He couldn't even look at her- she was unsure what she'd done so wrong. Was he mad from the other day? Was he mad because she hadn't found out where he was? Was he mad because he-
" You should stay in school, you know," Ethan finally said, breaking the uncomfortable silence that had surrounded the air, swallowing them both, and Rebekah's chest tightened. Her eyes turned to him, but he was still facing forward. Incredulity coated her face like a mask. She hadn't expected him to stay that.
When she didn't respond, he moved so that he was 12 o' clock from her, and his casual, sober eyes met her veiny, confused ones. " Stop wagging, it ain't gonna get you anywhere."
" Why does it concern you if I go or not?" Rebekah bit back as soon as he'd finished his sentence. She didn't know why she was raising her voice at him. Perhaps it was her natural instinct. Stop, Rebekah, stop.
Ethan's eyes seemed to warm, and Rebekah watched them morph into something that... that cared maybe. But he noticed her staring intently, and he flickered them before turning away. " I'm just saying, your dad will be onto you in no time, and you're just ruining your education."
Rebekah waited for him to show her that sign again, but he stayed facing the other way so she couldn't see his face. God, she must've been being foolish. Her green eyes narrowed.
" Yeah? Well, too bad I don't care about his opinion, and my education was ruined a long time ago," that end of the sentence had dejection roaming within it, and it caused Ethan to re-track to the moment they ruined Rebekah's life forever. That day they brought her here. In this very house. Fuck, if that memory still didn't crush him...
"Okay, but what good is it doing you staying here, fucking Kade and getting bladdered all day?" Ethan asked, his voice calm but his tone almost disappointed. Then he fisted his hands beside him and said, "It's disgusting,"
Rebekah pulled a mortified expression, and a pang of misery spread across her chest, only to be replaced by rage from his harsh words. "How dare you," She suddenly screeched. "How dare you speak to me like that. You're disgusting, and I don't give a shit what you think!"
He slowly turned to look at her, and her fiery eyes were so full of burning hatred, and this seemed to hit something within him. His face dropped, and he coiled away almost sadly. Silence fell up on them.
" I still think you should go," he repeated, now so quietly Rebekah hardly heard the words come from his lips, completely juxtaposing his previous behaviour. But the dialogue was loud enough for Rebekah's heart to squeeze, despite what he'd just said.
She breathed before casually asking, " Why haven't you been coming over?"
Ethan's face seemed to lose even more colour, and he stared at the ground, his eyes almost completely closed.
" I've just had to give myself a bit of space for a while," he admitted.
" Space for what?"
" You don't need to know that," he told her sharply, but mostly in panic, and this seemed to cause another sudden flame of anger in Rebekah because he was being so selfish. He'd left her here for a days; her drunken mind set was sending her emotions crazy, and she dug her fingernails deeper into her hand to the point she almost cried out, but it stopped her from screaming in his face like a mad woman.
Until Ethan had to go and add, "Don't question me like you know me, Rebekah." And this comment drove Rebekah's rage even more forwards, and she exploded.
" Anything could've been going on here, and you didn't come back!" She yelled, and Ethans wide eyes whipped over to Kade. Rebekah clearly did not care that he might wake and wonder what they were arguing over; the beer had prevented that from being a possibility in her mind. "So tell me what was so important, Ethan."
She almost pleaded that last part, and he looked at her for a quick second before coiling away.
" It's nothing," he said through his teeth, and Rebekah couldn't help but crush at the sight of him, despite the way he treated her. Oh yes, he'd act mad, but the pit in her stomach told her otherwise, and her mind seemed to fuzz with an unordinary feeling before she sunk back, and a short silence fell.
Rebekah watched him, her eyes unblinking, and her heart was pounding erratically in her chest. She wasn't scared, it was she about to do that caused this.
" Tell me," without thinking, Rebekah reached her hand up and pulled his face so that he was staring at her. A minute ago she was just roaring in his face, but now a sudden amount of feeling had hit her like a train, and she performed this sweet gesture to help herself deal. Ethan's eyes were big and wild, clearly shocked by Rebekah's actions. Hers were pleading, and he noticed the glossiness within them that caused him to melt. " Please," she begged, and her voice sounded raspy.
He looked to the side at her hand, but it stayed exactly where it was. It felt cold against his hot flushed skin. Rebekah did a triangle with her veiny emerald eyes; they look at his right eye, then his left eye, then his bright red lips. It may have been the influence of the spirit, but Rebekah leaned in, pressing her lips towards Ethan's and she felt him relax, but then immediately try and push her off, shoving at her body.
He managed to escape, and breathe a few words, his petrified eyes not moving from where Kade lay sleeping. " No, Rebekah sto-"
But he was cut of as she dived back in there. Rebekah didn't budge from him, and her grip on his face got harder. He was writhed beneath her grasp for a few moments, and she didn't care how needy she was making herself look either, because soon enough, Ethan's tongue was grazing over her lips, and his thick hand placed itself on the small of her neck.
Suddenly, grunting sounds filled the room, and their kiss was broken. Ethan snapped his back, darting his eyes over to that sofa again to see Kade stretching, his back facing them.
Ethan sprang up from the ground like a pin had gone up his arse, and Rebekah shuffled backwards, pressing her iced fingers against her warm lips.
Ethan's body was twinging as Kade turned around to look at them, and he yawned before rubbing his eyes. " Did use hear something? Is it the fireworks?"
Ethan and Rebekah both looked at each other in fear, and then turned back towards him. Nobody replied; Rebekah was rattling from a sudden rush of adrenaline, but Ethan nodded his head, hoping it would satisfy a half there Kayden.
He hmm'd, then began stretching. " I need some water," he said, yawning, still blinking like his vision was blur.
And Rebekah and Ethan didn't speak another word to each other for the rest of the night, knowing things were never the same once they were back in reality..
Hey guys, this is unedited, but I hope you liked. Also, this isn't a love story, trust me lol.