Lily’s POV
More time passed.
My eyes started to grow heavy with wanted sleep until I heard the door creak snapping my eyes wide open.
Peter walked through the door and made his way over to me slowly. I didn’t like the look in his eye. There was no more anger, only black empty coals. I made the first attempt to talk.
“Where have you been?”
He chuckled lightly to himself completely ignoring my question.
“You think you’re so innocent and better than me don’t you?”
What?
“What’s going on with you? I’ve never said I’m better. I think you act to rash and are cruel at times but that doesn’t mean I’m better.”
“You’re damn straight it doesn’t make you better. I mean I can’t be that bad cause you did fall in love with me. Right? Two monsters finding each other in the dark. Enjoying the delicious satisfaction in others pain and anguish.”
“Don’t you call me a monster! Everything I’ve done, I did cause I had no choice.”
I was thinking of the time I killed Sawyer to spare him a painful death at the hands of Pan. It was a choice I will always have to live with. A night that will haunt me til the end of my days.
“Oh there’s always a choice. You look it at me and you see everything you abhor in yourself. Sure you dress it up you with your mask of civility and eloquence. Your every bit the abomination I am. Or worse. Go on, Lily.Tell me I’m right.”
Why was he acting like this?
“You still cling to the hope that I can be redeemed. And if the monster can be saved. Well maybe there’s hope for you.”
He stepped closer and bent his head to the side, quietly observing me. Silence had never felt so loud.
“Do you believe in redemption?” His voice was detached, killer-cold, precise.
I nod as I answer. “I do.”
Out of nowhere Peter delivers a crunching blow to my nose, knocking me off my feet. My screams drown out his satanic laughs. Never has he hit me this hard, let alone punch me in the face.
“There lies no redemption for you. You will die and become nothing. Not even a speck of thought, or whisper of second chance.”
My eyes gushed with tears. They cascaded down my cheek, filling the shell of my ear with salty liquid. Pan’s tall stature loomed over my frightened form.
He stood proud and regal, entirely closed off and robotic. No cares, no feelings, no love or need in his eyes.
Just pure, calculated indifference.
“You don’t mean it Peter. You don’t. I know you. I know you-” I sucked a huge breath, sobbing at his rejection.
“You know nothing.”
I hated his icy aloofness, the confidence in his tone.
“But, I don’t understand. You want me. I’m yours.”
His eyes narrowed and all humanity dissolved- I stared into a killer’s soul.
“I wanted you for a time, and now that time has gone. Goodbye, Lily.”
I closed my eyes accepting the inevitable that I have lost my Peter for good. I waited for death to swallow me whole.
Pan’s POV
I woke up to an ungodly scream. Memories of what Shadow did and planned to do came crashing down.
That scream was Lily’s
“No!”
I used my magic to appear back at my tent. Please don’t let me be too late.
I burst through the entrance and freeze at what I saw. My blood ran cold at the sight of Lily’s bloodied broken form and what looked like a clone of me standing over her.
Shadow
Hatred and fury slithered like reptiles in my blood, and all I wanted was revenge. To make him pay.
That would all have to wait. My one priority was getting Lily to safety. I grab the one weapon I have against Shadow. A boxed candle that will contain him but not destroy.
I open the lid of the box and light the candle with the wave of my hand. My clone like imposter turned back in his dark evil form.
“You will pay for this Pan! No one breaks deals with me!”
My Shadow is sucked into the box and I close the lid quickly to contain him. Placing the box aside I fall to Lily’s side and quickly heal her wounds.
“You’re okay. I got you,” I soothed in her ear. Placing her in my lap I rock her back and forth.
“Peter?”
“Yes I’m here.”
Lily’s POV
Blocks of time disappeared, leaving me with a splattering of photographic images.
The time I first arrived on the island and let my captor kiss me.
Why why why
The time I got Sean killed
Guilt guilt guilt
The time Pan slapped and backhanded me
Abuse abuse abuse
The time I let myself finally become one with Peter
Shame shame shame
The time I killed Sawyer
Blood blood blood
The time Peter let Felix punish me
Scars scars scars
The time I almost got killed in Mystic Forest
Death death death
The time Peter saved me and pledged to do better
Hope hope hope
The time Peter let the new girl rip apart Jasper
Bastard bastard bastard
The time Peter tried to kill me
Cry cry cry
The time Peter saved me
Why why why?
How much longer before I completely lose my mind?
The darkness fades and I can see light as I wake up from a confusing slumber. I’m leaning against a tree and I can see Peter a few feet in front of me writing something on a piece of paper.
“Peter?”
His head snaps in my direction and he quickly folds the paper up into a brown satchel bag.
“Come on. You have to hurry.”
He walks over to help me stand. The look in his eyes has a far away sorrow gaze. It’s then I remember being inside his tent with him. At least I thought it was him. I was so sure I was good as dead, but once again it was Shadow. Twice he has tried to kill me. But Peter came. He always comes.
“You saved me.”
My words brought his attention back to me. He shook his head in disagreement.
“No I didn’t.” I see him holding a clear bean between his fingers and eyes it carefully. He throws it behind me making a funnel appear in the ground. “Not yet I haven’t.”
Another portal
My hands grasp onto his shoulders for dear life when I feel him back me up to the portal.
“What are you doing!?” I yelp out in confused panic.
“I’m saving you. I’m letting you go.”
He was letting me go home?
“Peter wait! I-I... shouldn’t we talk about this?”
After everything that’s happened between us, he couldn’t just shove me through a portal without explaining himself first. There was so much to say. And the portal didn’t allow us enough time.
“You need to leave. To forget about me. I need to fight my demons alone. It’s the only way. And If I fail at least I fail alone. You need to grow up, fall in love, and have a family..I... I can give you none of those things.”
He was letting me go. I should be happy. I should be jumping up and down with excitement, but all I can feel is a sickening emptiness in my stomach.
“Peter, I…”
Two fingers are brought to my lips, hushing my unspoken words.
"You’ll never again have to look me in the eye and cover our connection with hostility and revulsion. Never again have to wake up here fearing it may be your last. You’ll never have to loath the darkest parts of yourself that care for me in spite of all I’ve done.”
He brought the strap of the satchel over my head and across my shoulder. The weight of it made me wonder what was inside.
“I will be gone and you will be free.”
With those last words his lips crashed against mine and he picked me up in his strong arms lifting me off the ground.
I didn’t have time to even wrap my arms around his neck before I was free falling back into the real world.
Back to reality
Pan’s POV
I watched her fall out of my arms and leave me for good.
She was gone and I was back to where I started.
Alone
So much of what we shared was like a nightmare. But I wouldn’t give up a single minute I’d spent with her.