Marley is feeling a bit better by the time Vivian leaves. And Harry's cheeks are bright red. Which sort of makes her happy.
She only drinks about half the glass of water before her subconscious says enough, enough, enough.
But Marley is feeling better and drank about half the glass of water. Which sort of makes Harry happy.
And they both are thinking about their kiss the other day. Marley runs her fingers across the condensation on her glass, remembering the sweat on her forehead and his hands on her waist. While Harry pinches his lip between his pointer and forefinger, remembering what hers felt like against them.
"Sorry about Viv." He says. For the third time. Or maybe four. Marley has lost count.
"No, she's really cool." She says.
And they both are thinking about their kiss the other day when Harry realizes they have the whole house to themselves. So the hormonal boy with troubled kind of green eyes thinks of all the things they could do. Blushes even deeper when she catches his gaze.
"What?" Marley asks. He's smiling at her, and it makes her heart flutter and her cheeks warm.
"N-Nothing." He looks down at the countertop, smiling wider and blushing more fiercely.
Harry has never blushed this hard in his life. And it's all because of her. Its all because of the girl with crystal blue eyes that remind him of icicles and frost-bitten noses.
He's a good actor, I'll give him that.
"So your sister seemed adamant about me going on this camping trip. I don't want to upset her by saying 'no.'" She says. Wants him to tell her she should go and he would, too.
But Marley can only communicate silently with Maria.
"You don't have to. Vivian won't be mad if you don't go. She's just trying to bait me into going." He explains.
But all Marley can think is ouch. Because he just said his sister doesn't really want her to go, she just wants her brother to.
Ouch is right.
"I should be going." Her chair makes a loud noise as she stands up too fast. The backs of her knees pushing it across the hardwood.
"Wait, Marr, what did I say?" He goes after her as she walks toward his front door.
But she keeps going. The door slams behind her before being thrown open again by hands that remember what it felt like to cup freckled cheeks and tuck nearly blonde hair behind her ear. And now all that they feel is empty space and the girl in his first period English class slipping through his fingers.
"Marley!"
Her crystal blue eyes are rimmed with red from tears that she wish wouldn't spill. Her cold fingers are clamped into fists from emotions she wish had never escaped from their hiding place. Her feet move forward despite the crack each step creates in her heart.
And thank goodness Harry can walk faster than her because she needs this boy far more than she will ever know.
He grabs her by the waist before stepping in front of her. "I didn't mean it like that--"
"Let go of me!" Her voice is shaking with fury, hurt, jealousy, self-pitty and a whole rainbow of feelings that tangle up like string in her head. In her heart. In her veins. In her mouth. Until she's choking on them.
But thank goodness Harry can walk faster than her because she needs this boy far more than she will ever know. So when he doesn't listen and pulls her into his chest and wraps his arms around her like he will not ever let go, she doesn't fight it.
Because she needs this boy. She really truly does.
"No." He says. "I'm not letting you go."
And maybe that was the real beginning. Or maybe it was the moment he saw her in his first period English class.
But it was definitely the beginning of the end.
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Marley didn't think she would ever do this. She never went on family vacations. She never went on sleepovers.
But she is about to spend the weekend with Harry and his sister at a campground she has never heard of with a name that reminds her of oak trees and fireflies.
Her bag is small. Two pairs of shorts. Three shirts. Two pairs of undergarments. Sweatpants for sleeping. A comb. A toothbrush and a nearly empty tube of toothpaste because it's all she had at last minute.
Naturally, Maria reminded Marley half a dozen times about how stupid she is being. But she mostly voiced Marley's own insecurities.
She carries her bag down the stairs. In her living room sits the boy with troubled kind of green eyes that remind her of summer grass and warm breezes.
Harry glances up from his phone as she defends the stairs. Her hair is wet from her shower and braided down her back where a small bit of the water has soaked into her shirt. And there's not a hint of makeup on her freckled cheeks yet her eyes capture him just the same as every other time he has looked at her.
Marley smiles at Harry. Sets her bag on the beat up armchair.
"Ready?"
Not even close.
"Yeah, I think so." She says. "So what is this campground like?"
"Well there's a lot of these weird, big green things." He starts. "They're called trees."
Marley laughs and shoves his arm as she sits next to him.
And for a moment, Harry thinks this is the happiest he's seen her. "But there's a big lake with a rope swing and a small waterfall. There's a bath house for people camping in tents, like us."
And the hormonal teenage boy can't help but let his mind wander to what this camping trip could contain.
But Harry can't get ahead of himself because for a moment he thinks the girl with crystal blue eyes that remind him of icicles and frost-bitten noses is worth being patient for.
Though, his imagination lags behind his logic. And he stands from the couch before he can let himself think any further.
"Ready?" Harry still can't believe he talked her into it. Although Vivian did quite a bit of the convincing, too.
Marley smiles. Stands too. "You asked me that already."
"Oh." He says dumbly with an embarrassed smile. Grabs her bag off the chair before swinging it over his shoulder and heading toward the door.
"Wait." Marley says. Stepping closer as her heart beats heavily in her chest. Her eyes set on his.
And Harry waits because this girl is probably, hopefully, just maybe worth being patient for.
"I...ummm..." Marley doesn't know how to say it without sounding like a fool. She wants to kiss him. Boy, does she want to kiss him. "Never mind."
They both stand there for a moment. Wanting the same thing. But both too scared of the other's rejection. Despite anything that happened before.
Neither one is willing to jeopardize the weekend that way. So they awkwardly make their way to Harry's car in silence.
And the silence continues even as the engine pulls them closer and closer to the place he calls home and further and further away from the place she wishes she didn't.
Because that house will always hold a beat up armchair and too-small rooms and frameless mattresses and the smell of addiction.
And the memory of her mother leaving and never coming back.
So as they venture further and further away from the place she wishes she didn't call home, Marley smiles.
Harry notices. Smiles too. Can't help it.
He takes her hand on the middle console. And they both smile a little wider for the rest of the drive.
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LISTENING TO SPOKEN WORD POETRY HAS HELPED MY WRITING STYLE SO MUCH YOU DONT EVEN KNOW.
PLEAVE VOTE BUT ESPECIALLY COMMENT 'CAUSE THEY'RE MY FAVE.
ALL THE LOVE
-Lena xx