song of the chapter ~ my strange addiction by billie eilish
'I'm the powder, you're the fuse. just add some friction'
~ matt sturniolo~
matt had woken up before bella did, she was still in his arms, her face in the crook of his neck. she was pretty when she slept, just like she was when she was awake. the sun was slightly peaking through the blinds and hitting the side of her face, he stayed admiring her for a few minutes before she started to stir awake.
bell eyes fluttered open slightly, she felt matt's arms around her, just like when she fell asleep. she really liked this, being in his arms knowing that he doesn't truly hate her. she closed her eyes again, pretending to be asleep so she could stay like this a little longer. she didn't know if matt was awake or not and hoped he wasn't so she could stay for as long as possible, the only thing worrying her was nick or chris bursting into the room, they definitely wouldn't stop going on about if they found out.
she wasn't sure entirely what to do now, with matt. he hadn't exactly told her he liked or anything but considering, he memorised a poem of hers, keeps checking if she's okay and promised not to hurt her again it seemed like there was a chance. for now she'd just see what was going to happen between them, there was no point worrying about their relationship when they might not even have one.
matt could sense that bella was awake, " i know you're awake." he said, smiling as she let out a sigh. "no i'm not." she buried her face in the pillow, "yeah you are." he smirked as she tried getting out of the bed, he didn't let her and pulled her back in by her waist before she could actually get out, "where are you going?" he yawned, "i'm going before one of your brothers decide to storm in." she replied with an obvious tone, "no."
"fuck you mean no." god this guy was bi polar, one minute he was having full blown arguments with her and the next he was begging her to stay with him. "stay." she wanted to but didn't want chris and nick to keep talking about it until she dies. "what if they come in?"
"just hide or something." she smiled and rolled her eyes at him whilst lying down in his arms once again, she really could stay like this forever. "i hate you so much." she said, not entirely truthfully. "i hate you too." his eyes closed again, "don't you dare fucking fall asleep again." she whispered, playing with his hair, "you tried to." his eyes were still shut.
just as she was going to open her mouth and say they should get out of bed, nick and chris's voice echoed through the hall. "shit." they both said, bella jumped to hide by his bed, crouching down so she was out of view, matt just scrolled on his phone to make everything seem normal, as if bella wasn't literally just in the same bed as him, in his arms.
bella heard the door swing open and started praying whoever had wouldn't notice she was there, "matt have you seen bella?" nick asked, a perplexed tone. bella had to bite her lip so she wouldn't burst into laughter, she could tell matt was too. "she probably went to the toilet i don't know." he replied, trying to keep a straight face as nick closed the door. as soon as the door closed both her and matt burst into a fit of quiet laughter, "well now i need to fucking get out of here and pretend like i just got out the toilet." she made her way to the door, hoping neither chris or nick would happen to walk there the same time as her.
matt watched her leave, upset nick had ruined their interaction, he was so incredibly lucky that bella had forgave him last night, she was just so perfect. he really wanted to pull her back into his bed all over again but he knew his brothers would never let him live it down so he had to let her.
bella cautiously opened the door and quietly made her way to the bathroom, just so she could make it seem like she'd been there all along. noises from from the kitchen, indicated someone was in there most likely making breakfast and chris's open door suggested he wasn't in his room. she hurriedly reached the bathroom and locked herself inside, taking a moment to breathe deeply and reflect on the events since she had talked to matt last night. was she really so down bad that she forgave him for everything he said to her, and even continued to share a bed with him? not to mention the fact matt seemed to like it, unusual considering how long he hated her for.
just as she managed to catch up with herself and the events of last night, there were sudden bangs on the door. startled, she took another deep breath and opened the door, only to find a very confused looking nick standing there, awkwardly, "hey nick." she said as he gave her a suspicious look "where were you?". he questioned, knowing something was going on. "just in here." her cheeks failed her as they flushed a slight shade of red as she thought to herself, I wasn't in here, I was in Matt's bed, literally in his arms.
"strange.." nick said giving her a questionable look as she pushed past him and walked towards the kitchen, letting out a sigh of relief, "good morning." chloe was making toast in the kitchen, she could see bella's red cheeks but thought it'd be better not to ask her about it now, she already assumed what had happened after nick went up to her and asked where bella was.
"morning" bella replied, yawning as she grabbed some cereal from one of the cupboards, "how are you and chris?" him and chloe were so cute together, she really hoped chris finally stopped being a pussy and finally asked her to be his girlfriend, it was about time, bella was getting sick of the amount of flirting in her insta stories.
"good." she replied, grinning slightly. "did he finally ask you to be his girlfriend?" chloe tried to hide her smirk, but her attempt was unsuccessful. bella shrieked with excitement and hugged chloe, it was about time, they had been flirting like crazy. "i'm so happy for you guys." she said, bella was probably their biggest shipper so knowing they were finally together made her want to scream with excitement.
"what are you fucking screaming about?" chris rubbed his forehead as he gave an annoyed glance at bella who was trying to hold in her giggling, "nothing." she just pressed her lips together in order not to let a knowing smile escape from them, chris just mumbled something under his breath, he was always moody in the mornings, probably because he loved sleep and hated being awake.
chris immediately headed towards the TV, as was his usual morning routine. meanwhile, bella began eating her breakfast, her eyes fixed on her bowl, pretending to ignore Matt's presence. bella's breath caught as Matt walked past her, fearing that he wouldn't notice her attempt to appear nonchalant.
It was already a warm day, LA was always warm and bella had already found herself sweating in her plaid pajama trousers and black crop top. she hated hot days, which was kind of ironic considering she lived in a place where summer never ended. nick appeared from the stairs and still had a suspicious look whenever he glanced at bella, who pretended not to notice. "There's another party happening tonight, do you guys want to go? It's only influencers." bella just stared at her bowl of cereal as she played around with it using her spoon. She couldn't deal with another party, not after what happened last time.
they both agreed, looking at each other for a moment before turning away and blushing like little children. bella however stayed quiet, ignoring his question. can you blame her though? last time erik was around things got messy. what if he does the exact same thing like before? she couldn't risk it for her own emotional wellbeing. bella? nick asked, he had probably forgotten about that whole party situation last time because knowing nick, if he remebered he probably wouldn't have asked her. "umm okay." the last thing she wanted was everyone to think she was being dramatic so she couldn't bring hereself around to saying no.
matt knew that he had to give her the space she wanted even if it meant not being able to show her the support he wished he could. he assumed that she was still trying to pretend like she was pissed off at him based on how she reacted when he walked into the kitchen, to mention hiding from nick when he burst into his room twenty minutes ago.
"i'm going home so i can plan an outfit." she said, reluctant to leave but she needed as much alone time as she could gather so she could mentally prepare herself for the 'fun' evening ahead. "oh okay." it had only just clicked with nick about why her response wasn't so happy but she agreed to it so she must be fine right? she stood up and quickly cleaned up her dishes, rushing off to nick's room to get her bags and everything she had brought over.
before she was even able to step out of his room , matt appeared in the door frame, a worried expression his face, "are you sure you want to go?" he could tell she really didn't, in fact he could tell she really despised the idea. "mhm." feeling as though she just needed a breath of fresh air, "d'you need me to drive you home?"
"i'm not meant to like you at the moment you know." she sighed, shaking her head, "yeah but we'll just make something up."
"like what?" she rolled her eyes, standing in front of him, waiting patiently for an answer as their eyes locked, "i'll just say i'm getting mcdonalds or something and drive you home." he was down so bad it was getting kind of noticeable, "matt i'm really sorry and i know you apologised and whatever but i really do think it's best if we distance ourself, just for a little."
"what, why?" he really didn't want to, he just couldn't. "i need time to think and i think you need time to sort out whether you like me or not." she was upfront with it and she saw the look of disappointment in matt's face but continued to ignore it. "oh." was all he managed to mumble, "okay." he didn't say much after, and even though he really wanted to beg her not to keep distance with him, he also wanted her to be happy, so he left it and started walking away.
bella's house..
bella was lying on her bed doing absolutely nothing but staring at the ceiling in worry and boredom. she kind of regretted what she said to matt earlier, but it was for the best right? she hadn't even bothered to pick out an outfit yet, whatever she was wearing wasn't going to make her more excited for the party anyways.
instead of trying to find a decent dress to wear, she picked up her phone and started scrolling through her instagram feed, like she usually did when she hadn't much to do. it was only just as she was about to shut her phone off and throw it across the room in an annoyance that she had a party to attend, did her sister walk in. "hey, d'you still have that red mini dress?" of course she was asking for clothes, she always did. "yeah." she got up to search for it in her wardrobe and managed to find it and handed it over to her, "thanks."
"yeah whatever." she rolled her eyes, smiling because ella stealing her clothes had become a daily thing now. "i love you." ella said, walking out of her room, "i love you too." bella replied, getting back into bed and wallowing in self pity.
she kept thinking about him, he was all she could think about recently. every waking moment, his face would appear in her mind, his voice echoing in her ears. she couldn't escape the constant pull he had on her, no matter how hard she tried. she grabbed her notebook and pen, the lyrics flowed effortlessly onto the paper, this was probably the quickest song she had ever written and it was probably because it was all about matt.
it was definitely too late to record this and add it to her album but she could possibly release it's a single? not anytime soon though, she'll probably release it as soon as all her feelings and whatever craziness was going on in her head will die down. looking at the time panic had risen, she had spent around two hours sulking around and she had only an hour to get ready and she was clueless as to what she should wear.
she quickly rummaged through her closet, desperately searching for an outfit that would be decent enough. as she threw clothes around, her mind raced with thoughts of ways to relax and not think about what could happen at the party, which only made it worse. she finally settled on a simple black dress, hoping it would look fine because she really couldn't be bothered to put in a massive effort. taking a deep breath, she reminded herself to just enjoy the evening and not let her worries take over. after all this was meant to be fun, right?
-
the beeping of the sturniolo's van echoed into her bedroom as she quickly ran downstairs, grabbing a small bag, on her way finding a very tempting pack of cigarettes to steal, placed on the coffee table. she hesitated for a moment, her eyes fixed on the pack of cigarettes. she needed them right now, it was more of a want actually but it would be too embarrassing to say. her heart raced as she reached out and snatched the pack of cigarettes, stuffing them into her bag. she knew it was a temporary fix, but in that moment, she craved the comfort they gave her, also embarrassing but an addict's an addict.
everyone was waiting in the car, including chloe, matt's gaze stayed straight ahead, not looking at her for a second. she couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment, she knew she was the cause of his ignorance but even then she really really wished she could speak to him normally, even if it was going to wreck her. she stepped in the car, immediately tracing her finger tips on her thighs as she sat down like she always did when she was nervous.
matt noticed instantly when he glanced at her through the rear view mirror, he really wished he could hold her hand like he did last time she was nervous but she wanted space and he was going to give her it, even though it was the last thing he wanted.
"you should invite milo." nick smirked, he had such an obvious crush on him it was cute, "why don't you text him, didn't you get his number?" nick blushed, shaking his head "no it'll make it seem like i like him"
"you do like him idiot." bella teased, grabbing her phone because apparently nick was too much of a pussy.
💌 imessages 💋
milo : milo 🥰
bella : bella 🤍
bella 🤍
nick's asking if you want to come to a party
he's too much of a pussy to ask himself tho
milo 🥰
sure 😊
address ?
bella 🤍
yeah i'll send it in a second
-
they managed to arrive safely, it already looked so incredibly busy and bella wanted to run away at the sight of it, she liked parties but after what happened with erik she never wanted to go to one again. "milo's coming by the way." bella told nick, who had an instant smile appear on his face, "yay" was all he managed to say through his grin as they all walked on over to the building, it was another mansion, which wasn't surprising, there were mansions scattered everywhere in la. bella let the others go in first, taking a really deep breath, tonight was meant to be fun right? no worrying, no confusing feelings, just letting lose.
she followed everyone in, it wasn't like erik was going to be here, i mean he featured on her channel before and the triplets but he's not an influencer so she had nothing to worry about. except for the fact that if her mind wasn't on erik it would go to matt.
matt.matt.matt. she was starting to get used to his name in her head, and she was pissed off about it, why did he have to be so addictive? it's like he's the only person she can be completely comfortable around despite all the fucked up thing he's said to her. what was wrong with him - with her? she never used to be so desperate about boys, i mean there was erik and all but we hate him now and his stupid voice that can't seem to get out of bella's head.
honestly it's all exhausting her, everything's everywhere and it's making her go crazy, she just wishes everything was simpler, like last year when things had gotten all better. nick always tells her 'everything happens for a reason' but she honestly thinks it a dumb lie, because no one deserves to go through with what she did and there's no reasons to why, she just did. and it's way to late to go fix everything.
she must've gotten caught up in her thoughts too long because as soon as she looked up, the others had ran off somewhere. sigh. the music was too loud, the lights were too flashy, the smell was too alcoholic and the feeling of being here was too much. she needed to step outside - got to love party's right?
she didn't entirely know where she was going, no one would in this mansion but she was looking for a balcony she could smoke on, there's that saying like 'break bad habits' but what's the point if it's doing her good? by good she means, distracting her away from her own problems.. but still it's completely fine, except for the fact it's illegal and pretty bad for her health but who cares? not her.
she hadn't really managed to find a balcony, nor her friends who seemed to have just disappeared in thin air so instead she walked outside to the pool, she had seen a few influencers whom of which she knew, her first instinct was to ignore them because why the fuck would she want to talk to them knowing they're going to go on and on about youtube but on the other hand it could be a good distraction, but she'd much rather smoke a cigarette.
she sat on the edge of the pool, taking off her shoes, the led lights in the pool changing colours. she took the cigarettes out of her bag, hesitating for a second, was this really how she wanted to deal with her feelings? fuck it, yes she did.
she had brought a lighter of course, and used it to light it up, obviously. placing it on her lips and taking a really deep inhale, she closed her eyes, she missed the feeling of this, like the addict she is. she also wasn't being cautious enough about this so if any of the others saw her smoking, except chloe they'd probably freak out and smack her or the cigarette out her hand, or both.
did she really care right now though? no, this was the least of her worry's. right now she was worried about everything going on with matt, if there was anything because she was most likely being delusional. her thoughts seemed to have summoned him as his voice reached her from behind. "are you smoking again?" she turned to face him, looking up, "no." she tried to hide her cig, she put it down beside her and pretended like it wasn't hers, idiot.
"yes you are." he had a straight face on and his heart dropped realising it's most likely because of him, unless it's about erik which seemed to make sense but after self reflecting for half the day, he realised that hating her for four years and then suddenly trying to be nice to her can confuse the shit of someone.
"no." she still denied, there wasn't any point to because it smelt of smoke all around her, and her breath most definitely did too. "i'm not stupid."
"okay." she turned back around, slightly kicking her legs in the water, ignoring his presence even though she really wanted to just stand up and..
"what's going on?" he took a seat by her, crossing his legs though because there was no way he was dangling his legs in with trousers on. silence. "bella." he looks at her and then down to the cigarette she's picking up, with the urge to just smack it out of her hand. "matt we're meant to be distancing." she says coldly, she doesn't want to and he doesn't too but she had convinced herself that it was for the better and he understands why. "but-"
"no matt there's not buts, you've said a lot of fucked up things to me and i've forgiven you but you can't just constantly switch between liking me until you're unhappy with something i do. you've hated me ever since i've known you, you've never really explained why, except when you said i drive you insane, which i have no idea what that means, by the way. now suddenly your all over me like a puppy, i don't get it. we need space matt, i need you to sort out whether you like me or not so i'm not constantly trying to understand you."
she stood up, leaving her cigarette and placing her heels back onto her feet. god it felt good getting it all out. she didn't care if the truth hurt him because his messed up jokes had hurt her.
matt was left with shock written on his face, he deserved it all and everything she said was true, he still hated her, not in a bad way? in a 'i really really like you and you make me so confused i don't know what to do with myself' kind of way, you know? he needed to tell her how much he liked her because he physically can't deal with distancing herself.
he stood up, following her because, hey, he was crazy for her. she was making her way into the party, quickly as if she was running away from him, he managed to catch up with her, trying to think of ways in which he could tell her that he really did like her. "bella." his hand managed to lightly grab her wrist, she turned around, fear written on her face, it was only matt. there's no need to be scared, it's not erik, it's matt. she took a deep breath, "bella please." he pulled her closer to him slightly so she could hear him through the music.
"no."
"but i..i" he stumble on his words, trying to figure out a perfect way to say it so she could really believe it, "spit it out then." a look of annoyance on her face, she had only just registered that matt's hand remained on her wrist, and she liked it, she liked his touch and she shouldn't because they were distancing, they needed space from each other. she didn't want to, of course she really didn't but it was ruining her, she couldn't think properly when he was around.
despite this, she snatched her hand away, "i..really-" matt's voice was cut off by chloe, "there you are bitch, we were walking and you just disappeared. bella thought it was totally the opposite but who cares, they finally found each other, "milo's here and watching nick try flirt with him is funny, come see." shit she forgot about milo. chloe smiled awkwardly, knowing she had interrupted something but linked arms with her so they could find the others, leaving behind a very upset looking matt. not even upset, hopless.
"girl what the fuck is going, what's going on between you?" chloe asked, so quickly it's like she was holding it in. "i don't even know he tried telling me something." confusion was certain in her voice, "what did he say?"
"bitch i don't know, if i knew i'd tell you instantly but whatever he was saying would most likely make me fold, matt sturniolo could run me over with a truck and i'd forgive him." she was completely and utterly honest, because he would probably do it if he got the chance, at least he would've before and she would've totally let him.
"fair enough." chloe shrugged, she didn't expect any less from bella, she was really down bad and she had no idea why, matt had always seemed to dislike her, except for all those flirty moments. chloe decided to talk to nick after this, he probably knew most about their whole relationship and if she begged him enough, they could find a way to set them up.
chloe had spent hours on phone calls with bella talking about his, one minute she loves him and the next she hates his guts, it's confusing but one things is clear is that she's loves him.
her thoughts were cut off by bella's as she saw the group, "milo." she smiled, giving him a hug, "where were you?" he grinned, ruffling her hair, she rolled her eyes before answering, "by the pool, when did you get here?" she gave a quick glance to nick who looked like a happy school kid who had finally talked to their crush.
"twenty minutes ago? nicks been keeping me company though, chris went off with his girl obviously." nick smile upturned even more, she didn't think it was possible to smile that hard, it was cute. she wished her and matt were cute but there was nothing between them except the and in the sentence.
because they'd never be together, it would always be matt and bella. he hated her, it was always obvious, the only reason he was being nicer to her now was because he wanted to mess with her. and if he want and genuinely trying to be nice, he was still messing with her, no one changes they're mind that quickly.
matt was still off somewhere, probably exactly where he was left (which he was indeed) but bella tried not care, as if she hadn't been trying all night. but milo was here and she was with all he friends so it was a distraction, even better because he wasn't there to stare at her and make her knees weak.
"d'you guys want to go by the pool, it's quieter plus there's a bar? bella offered, her arms were still linked with chloe which chris looked jealous of her, he really must like her. she dragged them outside, spotting the bar, it had all sorts of shots, cocktails and all the fancy shit bella would usually never think of drinking, but right now it sounded like paradise.
her first instinct was to get some shots, she tried them before at the other party and they quickly gave her a buzz which she really needed to feel. matt wouldn't approve, he didn't last time. but this wasn't about him. except for the fact she was drinking so she could suppress all the feelings she had for him and forget about them until tomorrow.
"drinks anyone?" she asked, nick just gave an awkward shake of his head, it was weird seeing her drink alcohol when she used to to hate the idea of it. chloe agreed and so did milo. chris just shook his head with his brother, "okay we'll be right back." she smiled, heading over and ordering two shots for each of them and some sort of cocktail that seemed pretty cool to share. they downed one of the shots at the bar, grimacing at the taste as milo held the alcohol they had gotten, "bella, can i talk to you for a second?" nick led her a few feet away.
if he was going to start nagging her about drinking she was going to jump off the nearest building, it's just a bit fun, nothings ever that serious. except her feelings for matt. no. matt. matt. matt. he needed to get out of her head.
"bella what are you doing?" she was quite literally ready to climb onto the roof of the mansion and throw herself off, "not much, you?" she was going to pretend like she didn't understand what he was saying, play it cool? " bella why are you drinking?" he asked, a very serious face on, she still had her other shot in her hands and decided to down it before he'd snatch it off her. "it's just a bit of fun, nothings going to happen." she sighed, rolling her eyes, returning to everyone else because having to explain herself was not what she wanted to do
"for fucks sake." nick mumbled, he was actually kind of concerned for her, matt must've been really messing up with her mind. yeah he gets that his brother can be a dick and then switch into the nicest person ever but he hadn't really realised exactly how down bad bella was for him.
he watched her down her other shit, linking arms with chloe, giggling right after. this was getting out of hands, he really needed to talk to matt about her, he needed to talk some sense into him so he could finally confess his feelings for her, the right way. but where is he? he had kind of just disappeared, what was going on?
chris and nick kind of just stood awkwardly as the others sipped on whatever other brightly coloured drink they bought. even chris thought it was weird seeing bella drink, but people change right? sometimes people change other people and matt must have a crazy effect on her. "me and chris are going to find matt, we'll be back." nick couldn't watch his best friend drink her problems away any further without wanting to slap some sense into her -which he probably should've done by the way.
matt had headed back into his car, to think about what bella said. he was pissed off he got interrupted in the middle of telling her that he liked her and he was being honest, completely honest- he never truly hated her, it was just not being used to his feelings about her. and even then he knew the way he treated her wasn't.. entirely great.
💌 imessages 💋
sturniolo's
nick : the blue print
chris : chr*s
matt : matthias
the blue print
MATT
WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU
chr*s
wasting my time looking for you fr
matthias
i'm in the car
you guys can stay in the party
"well that was fucking pointless." nicks sighed, they had spent almost ten minutes looking for matt just to find out he was in the car the whole time, "I told you we should of fucking texted him, idiot." chris spat back, he could've been with chloe the whole time, not letting nick drag him around to look for matt who wasn't even in the party. "shut up." nick just rolled his eyes at his brother's usual aggressiveness.
"i'm going to the others to make sure they're not drunk off their ass." he continued, he didn't know about chloe and milo but he was sure that bella was the kind of person to underestimate how much alcohol you need to get drunk, she was just that kind of person.
they were still by the pool only this time milo had seemed to be blocking them from jumping in, what the fuck was going on?, they'd only left for ten minutes? nick hurried his way over, he was practically the mum of the group, it only made sense for him to go sort whatever was going on.
"milo what the fuck is going on?" bella and chloe were standing in front of him, talking about how refreshing the pool 'looks'? "well they decided to drink two more shots and are now trying to jump into the pool." he pressed his lips together at the sight of them, for god's sake. nick grabbed chloe's and bella's wrist, dragging them away, "you guys are fucking drunk, what is wrong with you both?" he rolled his eyes, as they stayed silent, both looking at each other and bursting into a fit of giggles. they were already hard to handle when they were sober, nick was in for a rough time trying to calm them down.
it was almost midnight down and people were starting to leave a little which meant if anything embarrassing was going to happen, at least it wouldn't happen in front of the whole party, thank god.
"nick?" bella asked, a feeling of so many emotions hitting her like a wave, "yeah?" chris had taken chloe away from them so he could look after her, so nick (thankfully) hadn't needed to look after them both. "i want matt." tears were filling her eyes as she looked up at him, a desperate look in her eyes which only made nick feel so incredibly bad for her, matt really needed to do something about this, he saw how annoying it was for bella when he built up tension just to ruin it the moment he could.
"i know you do." he wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed, "why is he such a dick, like please makeup your mind on whether you like me or not because you're driving me crazy." she let out a breath after, trying to hold in her tears but her very drunk self was not letting her, "i think he likes you, he just doesn't know how to express it."
"yeah but it's so annoying, one minute he's causing fucking arguments and the next i'm in his bed and he's hugging me, telling me i drive him insane."
"he what?" nick says, shock all over his face. did he just hear that right? that's where bella was this morning, in matt's bed. what the fuck. "i shouldn't have told you that. shit. shit. shit." her realisation seemed to make her think sober, "oh my god." nick was in a state of disbelief, who wouldn't be?
"i'm gonna just use the bathroom, i'll be be back." she totally did not just out herself and matt. god she was so stupid sometimes, and knowing nick he was definitely going to confront matt about it, just perfect. she ran off before nick could say anything and she could defintley feel nick's questionable stare on the back of her head.
she ran trying to find the nearest toilet, which proved to be a hard task because whoever decided to design this mansion had made way too many rooms. she managed to find one eventually, just in time to throw up in the toilet bowl without it going all over herself. she didn't really pay attention to how fancy the bathroom was and instead slouched against the wall by the sink.
tears were in her eyes but not because she just threw up, but because she had just outed herself and everything was just going wrong.
today was truly fucking crazy.
you could say this party was a bad idea, right?
omg im kinda proud of the writing about the party, in my actually writing decently era??
anyways... so much talk about confessing feelings but when will matt actually stop being a pussy??
(next few chapters are filler chapters so i can add more tension and flirty moments to build up 🥰)
ily
-ieva