15.06.2020
at farel's funeral.
i've never been so depressed before. i can't accept the reality. i feel so dumb, miserable and guilty towards him. i feel like i'm the one who should die, not him. he's such a good boy. he don't deserve to die this early. i'm the reason he died.
suddenly his mom came to hug me and hand out an envelope.
"suria, here's a note that farel wrote for you. before he dies, he ordered me to give this note to you. you're really important in his life, suria. all day, all night your name always comes out of farel's mouth"
i take that envelope from farel's mom.
"thank you, aunty" i just ignore other words that his mom said to me.
she smiled.
"please stay strong, darling. i'm here for you. anything just come to me"
i nod my head.
i open the envelope and take out the note.
i read it.