Myles wasn't sure of his steps again as he walked towards his aunt his heart won't stop pounding and guilt will not cease gnawing at him.
Immediately he stood in front of them with fear like a child who had gone against his mother and put his hand in the honey jar even after receiving serious warning not to. Never in his life had he been so unsure of himself,he didn't know how he should stand or where to or what facial expression to give.
Immediately Doreen lifted her head and saw him she was overcome by a new wave of anger,she gently detached from her husband and stood.
"Follow me" she said as she walked out of the living room.
Quietly he followed like a sheep being dragged to slaughter,within himself he decided that what ever the consequences were he will receive in good faith.
She pulled the door to study ajar and walked in shutting it hard in his face,his heart caught in his chest he would have got slammed had he been a second earlier.
He gently pull the door open and went in. His aunt was pacing from one end of the living room to the other and this continued for what seems to be an eternity to Myles though it was just for few minutes. He new she was trying to contain her anger right now and the best thing to do was patiently wait.
"I just can't believe you Myles,where have you been?" She demanded standing on akimbo few inches from him and though she was short and he could see the middle of her head due to his tall form without making efforts but by one glance without being told even a fool will know she's the one in charge.
"I ...I ....got a business call....and...and had to leave?" He stammered.
"A business call"she repeated with a laugh.
"You want me to believe that or is that really the truth, Myles do I look stupid to you,you dare stand there and lie to me?" She shouted and breathed out in an attempt to calm herself.
"Aunt am not lying to you" he defended taking a step closer to her but she took one back.
"Let's say I believe you, but you know you didn't come to Paris for business,do you?" She asked and he nodded.
"Just for one day,you were left alone with Zuriel and this happened,what is wrong with you Myles,why do you make it hard for people who live around you, can't you perform your duty well as a husband for day,now she's in that hospital bed fighting for life and even the doctors are not sure if she's going to make it,why do I care telling you that, I guess you will be happy if she died,moreover you never wanted her anyway" Doreen said as she turned around to wipe a stray tears.
"Are you all going to blame me for this, did any of you listen to me when I said I didn't want to get married especially to that weak woman" he said causing his aunt to turn around with laughter.
"She's weak you say?, What have you done to make her strong, all I know is that you're the best at making weak and vulnerable,as a husband and a spouse you shape your spouse to your taste,if she's weak make her strong,poor make her rich,ugly make her beautiful, timid be her confidence, doesn't have a voice be her voice, can't speak speak for her,mould her into what you want her to be,Zuriel is a sharp woman ready to learn, but you've never opened up to her, all you see when you look at her is burden,bondage, if you're blinded by your dislike for her you will never see her good nature, try to be on positive and you will see the positive side of your woman and this marriage Myles" Doreen said firmly before turning to face him.
"I can't, I've tried but I cannot" he confessed.
"You haven't tried enough,try not to be rigid,be open and everything will work out fine" she said and he nodded.
"Did you guys had a fight today?" She asked.
He shook his head and then answered
"No".
"And you don't know how she ended up in the pool,do you?" She demanded with one hand on her chin and the other crossed around her chest.
For a moment he hesitated. He thought of the most possible answer he could give,of course he wasn't going to say he did because that will only aggravate the situation and neither did he want to lie but in what way could he answer her without lying or putting himself in trouble.
"I don't" he said as he swallowed a gulp.
"I can't believe that with the number of people in this house,no one saw when she fell into the pool to the extent of drawing" Doreen lamented while Myles just nodded in agreement.
"Frankly speaking Myles I don't know what to tell your grandmother or her parents,speaking to your grandma yesterday I got to find out that her sick sister will be due for surgery in two days time and her parents wish she did come home before it happens, her sister won't stop asking about her and she demanded she sees her before she's operated upon incase she does not make it out of the theatre,and now this,i don't know how to break the news to her seriously" Doreen voiced.
Myles took few steps towards her, towering over her small form,he wrapped his hands around her in a comforting way.
"We could just tell them, she's not in the position to come home,they did understand since they know she doesn't have the best of health status" Myles suggested as he rub his aunt back in a comforting way.
She sniffed,break the hug and held his large hands in hers.
"I just need you to promise me this Myles,that when Zuriel regains herself,you will be the best husband to her,come what may" she said with pleading eyes.
"I promise I will, come what may" he promised giving her a tight smile.
She pulled him into her arms hugging him tightly.
*** ***
It was almost midnight and while the house was dead quiet probably because it's occupants were fast asleep Myles couldn't.
His heart won't stop racing and as guilt gnaw at him he couldn't help but see Zuriel in everything in the room.
He tried to sleep but failed,he wanted to rid himself of the guilt but didn't know how.
Finally after hours of turning in the bed and pacing around the room he decided to leave the house.
He pulled on a pair of jeans toppling it up with a matching jacket and made his way out of the deadly quiet room into the parking lot.
He hop onto the Yamaha yzf-r6 and zoomed off. The gate keepers who were already fast asleep were forced to their feet when they heard the sound of the roaring engine of the bike and out they went to the gate.
The front lights blinded their vision and from afar they couldn't see who was approaching until he was few metres closer. After exchanging pleasantries they made to open the door and he zoomed out when they did.
Riding into the streets at such an hour was much easier than he expected. He did expect the streets to be filled or properly still noisy with pedestrian walking around and probably and small traffic but the opposite seems to be the case. The old audible noise was that of a siren from the vans of police on patrol.
*** ****
He felt a rush of emotions immediately he stepped on the hospital ground. All he did was hope and wish as he made his way towards the building.
The nurses had refused him entrance to the ward, telling him if he wanted to see her he should come back the following morning, but Myles was restless he didn't know why he was overcome by a surging urge to see her, maybe because he was fearing for the unknown. It didn't know what he will do to himself if they lost the thought of that only sent him running out of the hospital into the premises hyperventilating and sweating thoroughly. He went back in when he finally regained himself and got himself a seat at the back of the waiting area in the reception.
*** *** ***
Louis didn't know how, but he found himself outside the hospital building glaring at the hospital name plate at the highest floor of the building. Maybe it was grief or the Love he had for Zuriel or maybe something else but he knew that there was a reason behind him being here. He couldn't sleep a blink when his mind was constantly being pulled to Zuriel almost lifeless self on the bed. He had come to love and care for her more than he had ever to any of his siblings, he knew she was special not because she is a lady with special need but because in her being and nature you could see that she was special, she was quite mature and down to earth more than anyone at her age and generation could ever be and that was one thing he loved about her, she was a woman worth Knowing, a woman that though carries a lot troubles but still find a reason to smile so beautifully, who wouldn't be drawn to such a person?.
He had cry so much that he couldn't anymore, he was sure that he had drained out his tears and possibly lost his voice in the process.
*** *** ***
The next day in the morning after the doctors round Louis and Myles found themselves at the door desperately waiting to be permitted in.
Immediately the man made his way out they literally fought to get him bit he held them back and said.
"there is no improvement, her Glasgow coma scale is still below average and we've tried out best to drain out the water from her airways, even with that all hope is not lost, just pray for the better, we tried our best and put in our best skills to resuscitate her to extent that there is nothing else we can do, but I believe she will live if she has the will to".
His words left the brothers silent while he watch their reactions as reality sank into them.
"I will advice you go in one at a time and limit noise as much as possible "he ordered before proceeding to another ward with his crew.
As duo stared at each other throwing daggers at each daring the other to take the lead and attempt going in first.
At the moment Doreen and her two daughters made an entry into the hospital and walked towards the brothers.
"How is she doing?" Ada demanded in a weary tone being the first to reach the two.
They both ignored her turning their faces away.
She sniffed and she took in their appearance.
They were both looking haggard, Louis the worst,both had bags under their eyes and their eyes looked like they've been deprived of sleep, Myles had a small stubble on his chin and jaw.
"You guys suddenly develop crease eyes overnight,they look like they will fall out their socket anytime soon" Amelie said as she approached them and again no one gave her a glance and neither did they care about their appearance that moment.
"I think I should take a photo of the both of you this moment,it will serve as a good memorial" Amelie joked forming a camera with her hands as she placed a foot behind her and slightly bend her knee.
Not finding it funny,no one laughed instead they both threw her a questionable look.
"I support 100%" Ada said throwing a fist into the air.
"Okay,i understand,we get the point people,what did the doctor say?" Amelie said now with a serious tone.
"No improvement" Myles said under his breadth.
"Sweet Jesus" Amelie exclaimed as took a seat close to the door.
"Can we see her?" Ada demanded drawing the attention of the nurse who just walked past them.
"Yes,you may,but one at time, we wouldn't want her to be disturbed at such a stage" the nurse responded and began walking away.
"Thank you" Ada said as she settled down close to her sister.
"Myles,you should go see your wife" Doreen said and the look Louis threw at her could kill a nation.
Myles took hesitant foot steps towards the door,moment ago he would have done anything to go in but now that he had to resistor he wasn't sure of himself or his actions anymore. How should he behave,what was he going to see? All of those questions kept replaying in hid head.
He pulled the door ajar went in and shut it begin him.
Are you going to stand there all there? Ada demanded of her brother who was standing just in front of the door to Zuriel's ward like a door man.
When Louis made no response Amelie added.
"Come have a seat"she said as she patted the space in between she and her sister.
With reluctancy he made his way towards them and took the seat.
"Myles grandma called today" Doreen said after a long silence and paused while her children listened with eager ears.
"She did asked me about Myles and Zuriel and I had to lie that they were okay,i couldn't bring myself to tell her what had happened" she said with sigh.
"I bet you know that you still have to tell them what has happened and that the situation will not change just by hiding it from Grandma and Zuriel's parents" Louis commented making sure to inform his mother with his tone and facial expressions that he didn't support her actions one bit.
"We all know that obviously,but would you rather choose to convey the situation to them when it's at it peak than wait for it to subside?" Ada demanded in disapproval.
"What if it doesn't?" Louis demanded.
"Is what you are wishing?" Ada responded irked by her brother's persistency on the matter.
"We all know that's not true, we won't deny the fact that there is truth in his words" Amelie said stepping in as the elder sister that she was.
"Are you supporting him?"Ada demanded sounding surprised.
"Am not ok,and neither am I saying he's totally right,both mom and Louis are right if you look at the situation from their angle" Amelie explain earning a confused stare from Ada before she said.
"I don't get your point,why don't you just root for one person?"
"Stop it Ada, we are not out for votes but to find solutions" Doreen said.
"Finding solutions is not our place but asking for one is ours" Louis commented.
"You're right, let's all earnestly pray for Zuriel I just don't know how to convey her situation to her family,it kills me that something like that will happen to a fine young woman like her, in my house without anyone knowing how, I've come love her and care for her like a daughter, Zuriel is a special girl,she not just special because she differently capable, she's special because she's a special lady,properly raised and trained" Doreen said with a sober tone as stray tears ran down her chin for the first time after the occurrence.
Ada and Amelie came to her and rounded her with their arms.
*** ***
Myles with uncertain steps walked into the ward. For some reason the energy he had to fight Louis earlier has gradually diminished leaving him with a fear he never knew he had,gall well up his throat and he felt like running back and finding somewhere to hide but for some reason he felt an urge to also run inside and pull her to himself,he was like vehicle being wheeled against the road,the friction was there but had left him dis oriented.
He finally made it into the room after a decade of walking. Seeing her almost lifeless form lying against the white bed of the hospital it made quilt whelm Up his throat causing his mouth to become sour. With small steps he walked towards her and while he did he couldn't keep his form off her. He stood beside her for a while overpowered by different thoughts,he was tempted to again run away but as he made to he felt caught and rooted to his position finding it hard to move until he finally gave him and satin the chair beside the bed.
He stared at her quietly as random thoughts ran over his head.
"What if she does not make it?"
"What if she ended up dying?"
"What was he going to tell her parents or his grandma?"
The thought of that made him pull his hair in agitation until it hurts like someone who has trichotillomania.
He felt the urge to touch,feel her,hold her and earnestly apologised to her but how could he when she wouldn't even hear him but still something told him to abd he did.
"Am sorry" he said with a croak voice as a stray tear left his tears filled eyes followed by a river flow.
It had been long since he cried, the last time he did was when his mother died and he was neglected by his father. It had cause him so much pain like that of losing both parents at the same time. But afterwards he had vowed never to cry again and even as the kid that he was them he had learn how to bottle his pain up and relieve it by expression of anger. But now seeing this woman that bear the name of his wife lying lifelessly on that bed brought a realisation of what he had done to him making him feel like a murderer to some extent. The quilt he felt made him start making promises he never dreamt he did ever made to anyone in his lifetime.
Carefully he took her small hand into his and held so carefully for it felt so fragile against his big ones,he held it with both hands rubbing his thumbs against the back simultaneously. He lay a gentle kiss on it and took it to his cheek causing a tear to fall on it. Silently he sob as he held her hand. He couldn't say he love her at that moment but he did admit that to some extent he cared for her If asked.
Quickly like he was stung he lay her hand back it place and shot up.
"What's it okay to touch her?"
"What if touching cause more harm on her?" He thought as he pulled the chairs and sat inches away.
He observed her from his position. Her mouth and nose where covered with an oxygen mask,and intravenous infusion had been set and running through the vein of her right hand and her vital signs being monitored by an electrocardiogram and a spO2 machine.
He shifted close to her to observe her,her face and body was pale and her lips dried.
In no time he was back by her side with her hand on his face.
He felt the urge to pray for Herat that moment though he hadn't been the praying type for quite some time now.
"Dear God" he began and laughed.
"It feels wrong that I should be using the dear,because I kind of don't believe you're dear to me or something like that,but am sure you're dear to Zuriel this isn't for me but for her" he said and sigh.
For a whole he remained silent before continuing again.
"I believe you're faithful to those who are faithful to you, and Zuriel is and my grandmother too,actually everyone around is except myself. Healing is the bread of the children and by you stripes we are heal,your word say, please fulfil your words in Zuriel's life,not because we owe you anything but because you love he more than anyone else and I promise,no I will try to be a better husband to her, she's gone through a lot dear God,so don't throw anymore troubles at her and don't take too much either but let her live happy for the rest of her life ,not because we are worthy but because you're a good good father" he prayed and lay his head on the bed with his hand and he intertwined. He felt asleep in that position without knowing how and when.
*** ***
Louis after waiting for about an hour for Myles to come out was already agitated, he wouldn't stop pacing back and forth and neither will he listen to the voice of reasoning to sit.
"Am done waiting" he muttered to himself and angrily stomp towards the door but on getting there he gently pushed the door slightly opening it and prepare inside,what he saw shocked him and he quickly pull it completely ajar and stepped inside.
He watched the couples as they slept quietly with hands intertwine if not the circumstances someone would have said they had been sleeping peacefully.
He gaze shifted to Zuriel who was lying on the bed in a supine position, her lips were cracked,with a tint blue and her body and face were pale.
He sigh as utmost remorse overcame him,he wishes he hadn't gone out that day,then none of this would have happened,he did have been staring at her beautiful smile at the moment while they eat something sweet,maybe something she had baked.
But even with that he couldn't deny the fact that she did still look beautiful and would win any beauty pageant if opportune to partake in one.
Staring at the couple made Louis realise that Myles like all of them had been affected by the situation in one way or the other, he also needed more comfort than any of them since she is his wife or maybe he did actually care for he but none of them had been able to see that, the thought of that made Louis wishes and longed for the good old days when he would often visit England and Myles was ever the over protecting older cousin or more like a brother that he was,times when Myles will give up his most dear for him and more and also that beautiful smile that was so rare yet often shown that revealed his left sided dimple.
At moment Louis did made up his mind to be a better brother and try to understand Myles though he doesn't buy the fact that Myles should be so aggressive just because he went through a situation.
For was in a daze for minutes until he finally regained himself and he went to her place a hand on her cold Forehead. After the prayer he said.
"Father in all of this let your will be done" but he voice inside of him counter him and said
"What if God's will is not actually what you want,or maybe his will is for her to end this way" the thought of that left him faze.
"Because you're a good God,and you listen to your children,you eyes are blind that you cannot see out pain,your ears are not deaf that you cannot hear cry neither are your hands short that you cannot reach to us,father lord, give us what we deserve,but at the thought of that he quickly reacted again,not what we deserve,am being specific right now,heal Zuriel as soon as possible" he concluded and took his hands off her forehead. At that moment his sister's who gone to see the doctor with their mother when he came into the room pushed their heads simultaneously through the door.
"Mom said she wouldn't be able to see her in such a condition" Ada volunteered when Louis gave them a questionable look.
"Wow nice couple" she said as she completely pushed the door ajar almost causing Amelie who hadn't be so balance on her stand to almost fall.
She brought out her phone as she walked herself in and began taking photos.
"Isn't that so stupid of you,that's in such circumstances you would not have thought of anything else than to take pictures,how unthinkable" Louis said with disgust.
"Watch your ...."she began in a loud voice and when the other siblings threw her a dirty look she finally she shut up immediately.
"Watch your tongue boy" she said calling him boy to get on his nerves.
"Ada behave your age and status and you Louis what about respect for elders have you forgotten that so soon when you're not even totally grown up?" Amelie cautioned.
"It's so bad" Amelie added.
"Yeah" Ada agreed in a flat voice.
"She doesn't deserve this, oh God where are you, can you see for yourself what you've permitted?" Amelie said with her face facing the roof as in search for God.
"Please let's keep ourselves pure and earnestly pray for a turn around in this situation, I suggest we all fast tomorrow" Amelie said.
"She's all pale and white, her lips are even cracked" Ada pointed as tears ran down her cheeks. Louis didn't know whether to classify them as false or not seconds ago he would have argued if he were told the hard core Ada will be move to tears, or was she sick at the moment?" Louis thought.
Immediately they turned to leave the door was opened by a male nurse who did nothing to hide how displease he was with their presence in the room.
"Out all of you" he said in a commanding tone and they all followed like sheep's being led to slaughter.
"I believe you all were told not to overcrowd the room" he said as he stared from one to the other waiting for a reply. While the women were quiet in quilt Louis found the guy rather annoying.
"We were advised to go in one at time not overcrowd,it was more like a suggestion than an order" Louis challenge and the nurse came and stood directly in front of him at eye level. Since they seem to be of the same height they hardest each other with none ready to back off. Louis ignored Amelie sign to back off while Ada seemed to be amused by the situation as a sly smile played on her lips.
"Because you got money,you think everyone is made to Massage your ego huh?" The red haired nurse with the name Francisco said.
"I understand that it hurts to be poor Fran....cis....co,but a little advise go something about your condition and not lay your frustration on patient relatives and be careful, next time I might decide to complain to hospital authority" Louis said and Amelie quickly pull him away at his last word as she apologised while pulling him towards the hospital exit while Ada couldn't help but giggle from behind.
Francisco was left with nose flared in anger, speechless as he watched them retreat.
At the thought that the gut who had his head on the bed and his fingers intertwined with Zuriel's was still in there brought him back to his senses as he hurriedly reached for the door.
He impatiently tap Myles on the arm,but he didn't budge. He was greatly annoyed and he shook him until Myles groaned and finally opened his eyes. Slowly he lifted his head from the bed while Francisco watched as he felt like each passing second was like an hour.
"Who are you?"he asked when Myles has regained himself and turned his head towards him.
"Who am I?" He demanded as he stood to his feet.
Francisco was alarmed by his height for he made him feel short and close to nothing with his small built. He never expected Myles to be this tall and well built since he looked average with is form on that chair,maybe he hadn't notice since Myles had his legs under the bed. Francisco felt conscious and undergrowth at this moment.
"Even among men,there are men" he though to himself as he stared and size up Myles while Myles stared back blankly with raised brow.
"I am her husband" he responded drawing his attention back to himself.
"I see" was all he could say.
"Visiting time are over" he added.
"OK"was Myles response as he walked out after saying.
"I promise to be nice when she wakes up" leaving Francisco wondering if the words were for him or someone else.