Jisoo's POV
"Honestly, I don't get it. Why does she have to date that guy?" I can't help it but to tighten my grip on the soju bottle in my hand. People always said it always tasted bitter when you're sad and sweet when you're happy. And it tasted bitter, particularly today.
"Jisoo, you're acting weird. She can date anyone, as long as she's happy. Don't you think you're overreacting?" Lisa said and giving me confused look.
How could I not, when I am the one that should be with her? I've wanted to say those words but decided not to, I don't want to complicated things even more. Lisa doesn't know about my feeling about Jennie and if she did, she will laugh her ass off, not believing a damn thing.
Who would believe that anyway? Jisoo that is known of having allergic to commitment but in love with her bestfriend? The tabloids will go crazy.
"Stop drinking or I will snap your head with that bottle." Lisa said and grab the bottle and look me in the eyes as a warning and I know I won't win this argument against her tonight. "Gosh, you're being so serious tonight" I retorted. "I've called Chaeyoung, she will be here shortly to pick us. I don't wanna in the car with you" she said and rolled her eyes to me. Very childish.
Well, to make it short, both of us are having a fair share of nagging from Chaeyoung, saying that we shouldn't do that again for the paparazzi are always into us. That she will not tolerate her friends being stupid, drinking like there's no tomorrow, safety this and safety that.
"Let's pretend that we're asleep" I whispered to Lisa. Before we can put our heads on the each others' shoulder, a tissue box flying to our faces from the front seat and at that moment, I knew I've fucked up and Chaeyoung is pissed off.
"Babe, it's not me. I just came there because unnie called for me earlier" Lisa said. Before Chae said anything--- "BABE? What babe? The tone is way different from what we always use" I said. The whole car went silent and then I know. OMG. Chae just turn the radio on and Lisa pretend to be asleep.
We're at my place and those two are obviously avoiding my eyes saying I should get my rest as soon as possible. I crossed my hands, "Speak" I said. Chae are looking at me with guilty look and said "look unnie, it's not like we're hiding this from you. It's just a lot of things happened and you always said that we can never teach our heart, who to love".
I sighed. "I am not mad at you guys but we are friends for how long, how can you didn't tell me? We should celebrate this. I always got the feeling that you guys have something fishy" I said and smile at them. They cried and hug me, thanking me that I'm not mad at them, I mean why should I be mad, as long as this won't affect our friendship.
I feel guilty actually because I hide my feeling for Jennie from them. It's just, complicated and I don't know how to start. I am afraid I will ruin our friendship. The 3 of us, Lisa, Jennie and me are bestfriends since forever, our families knows each other for a long time. Chae just came here about 4 years ago. If things goes wrong with me and Jennie, friendship and families ties will be on the line and I can't be selfish. Moreover, I know Jennie doesn't love me the way I did. But someday, I hope I will have the courage, to at least tell them for they are my friends that I loves Jennie because I know I'm a chicken in front of Jennie.
After a bitter taste of soju, the night seems long to come into morning. And here I am, looking at the ceiling with this hidden feeling, always wishing I can be brave enough to confess to her.