Shehnaaz felt Sidharth's stirring next to her, the room was still plunged in darkness and the morning song had yet to play. She was snuggled into his side with her back nestled against his body. He was semi awake and he turned towards Shehnaaz and spooned her from behind and flung his arm across her body and caressed her face with his. She instinctively acknowledged him by cupping his face with her tiny palm and cupping it she softly said "putthu uth gaya, abhi aur time hai, aaj Saturday bhi hai soja, kal late sey soye haina" saying this she lightly caressed his cheek with her palm. He purred a deep 'hmmmm' acknowledging what she said and yet unwilling to give up this intimacy for sleep just yet. This house offered very few opportunities to cuddle and express tender emotions. He snuck his hand under her top and laid his bare palms firmly against her tummy and started sensuously rubbing his fingers there, and he said 'chal tu bhi soja meri jaan' and both of them gave into the physical exhaustion and the comfort they both experienced by being next to each other.
The next thing they knew the lights rudely came on and music blasted and the morning was well underway. Sidharth deliberately joined in on the dance this morning to fool around and to also break the mood from the horrendous events of the night gone by.he had decided that today he will ignore all the people who got on his nerve and just hang with the people who he currently was able to tolerate and also be witty instead of aggressive. He needed to wind down and refocus on the game. Between the extreme emotions Shehnaaz and asim and rashmi evoked in him, he had lost sight of winning the game. So he spent beginning of the morning with paras and mahira and even indulged in banter with them. Even while he did that he in some way wanted to put Arti in her place and wanted to do that for a long time coming. The tea incident with Rashmi only confirmed to him that she was playing a clever game and stringing everyone along while coming out righteous and holier than thou. So he did what came best to him, that is teasing her but also taunting her.
Shehnaaz in the meanwhile was relieved that Sidharth and she were now talking but was also on the edge because so many things remained unclear and yet so many things came out uncomfortably clear. The sight of Sidharth flirting with Mallika SHerawat even though she knew it was all staged, the sight of Arti and Sid in the staged setting of feeding each other chocolate dipped strawberries, the fact that Paras and Mahira seemed to be in on the inner circle and were establishing boundaries that was trying to keep her out, it all rankled on her. She was coming slightly unhinged. All the things that rooted her, grounded her, it was all coming unhinged because Sidharth has entered her inner sanctum, hell she did not even know she had an inner sanctum till he waltzed right in! She took her morning cup of tea and went in and sat on the blue couch hoping to just come to terms with her swirling emotions and feelings. She settled there and desperately tried to ignore that Sidharth was sitting around a circle which consisted of Arti, ShefaliZ, Paras and Mahira....Mahira was mocking and celebrating the fact that she was not doing her breakfast duty, everyone was riling her on. These things went against Shehnaaz's life and work ethics, she could not bring herself to shirk away from duties irrespective of who the captain was. More than anything else, the fact that Sidharth was sitting there and doing this that did not sit well with her, it upset her but what upset her more was that he was doing things that were driven and directed by others. Whatever he told her the previous evening about her becoming a part of others game he seemed to have unwittingly fallen victim to the same tendency.
MEanwhile all of these emotions played out silently on Shehnaaz's face and Sidharth could see through the mirror that she was obviously vexing over something and at this point he could not afford Shehnaaz to over think matters and go off on a tangent, it took way too much effort to coax her. He did not want her to make assumptions about anything but he really could not afford to let out in anyway what was going on his head and heart regarding the game because as the past two days had proven, the creatives were piggy backing on her and them a lot. He wanted to be a few steps ahead of them and also wanted to not lose her along the way. For now he took a deep breath and sauntered towards her and even though seat next to her was empty he sat into her cooed 'moti baby chai akela pee rahi hai, kya baath hai aajkal unko dekho toh vo hee kaafi hai, haaye haaye kya baath hai' he said this to her while winking towards Paras. This broke her a bit and she sadly asked him 'tu yeh baatein Karnay ke liye yahaan aaya hai toh its ok sidharth, jaa apnay arti ke paas, ghar mein strawberries toh Nahin hai lekin fruits paday hain, jaa Khila apnee lover ko.'
She said that and got up from where she was sitting and shifted herself to the other seat, leaving Sidharth bereft, who took a deep breath and prayed for patience and at the same time a strange thought, no scratch that, a strange conviction washed over him that his sisters were watching all of this and were cheering this chit of a girl who had managed to make him do all that he managed to evade all his life. But not one to ever give up or give in to any tussle he cheekily pushed her a teeny tiny bit further by saying "achaaaa toh jo mainay kiya kal Aarti ke saath, task tha, aap Kaam ko aur reality ko mix kar raheen hain, Asia hai toh phir yeh jo aap har saans mein Paras Paras jo karti rehthee hai, an uska kya matlab mein nikaloon? Yes moti baby?"
Shehnaaz gave him a death glare and tried to calm herself, him his behavior, her feelings, the churning inside of her, the yearning for that which is not a reality yet the anticipation of that it was all very overwhelming for her. Sidharth was so accessible to her and yet he was so unattainable, then why did he give such strong vibes of proximity. Even if she took a long hard critical glance at their relationship as it stood today there was no denying that there was chemistry and attraction and a whole of care and concern. But why? Why did he feel the need to feed this unsaid waiting to be birthed yet could never take life emotion between them. For now she decided that she would be candid with what was bugging her and she voiced it out as plain as day and said "tu na jo tipanni dusro ko detha hai na Khud samajh liya kar, tujhay nahi dikh raha hai ki shehzaadi aur uskay Prince jo kaam ko lekar drama kar rahaein hain voh galat hai aur tu ab unkay game mein as raha hai unko aisay galat mudho pey support karkay apnay aap ko galat dukha raha hain. Just asim captain ban Gaya isiliye? Wow yaar, fair khelo aur jeeto aisay phaltoo ke harkath karnay sey jeetkay kya faaidah." Sidharth was gobsmacked at what she said. And she was not entirely wrong, but Sidharth also knew that when Paras and Mahira were willing to shortchange themselves and their ethics for the game he would never stop them, primarily they were not as important to him and if they were doings things to lighten his load then why would he stop them. None of this could be articulated to the ball of cuteness who sat in front of him so he chose to fall back on pulling her leg. And he just felt this surge of emotions well up within him for her and he felt a pang of regret that he could not be as vocal or as tactile as he truly could be, so for now he settled in for getting up and sitting on her with his full weight and she screeched "sidhaaaaaarthhhhh kya kar raha hai, uth unnnhunnnnhh uth na kuttay" and because it was her she ended up giggling and making him chuckle and he got up but only to swiftly capture her legs between his and pin her shoulder down and brought his forehead to hers and rasped into her "I could bite you now, that's how cute you are, chal abhi andhar chal and oil lagga, Saala asim ko captain bananay ke chakra mein jo mera dimaag sadaya hai na tunay, min two hours kar, chal ab andhar chal," saying this he quickly and subtly nipped her nose and chuckled when she yelped in pain.
The rest of the day they were playing an extremely dangerous yet flirty game with each other, taunting, pushing pulling, it was almost like an emotional foreplay which confused Shehnaaz and the housemates watching them as well. The only person who was firmly in the know was Mr.Shukla and from taking over her waxing to taunting to teasing to falling on top her to hugging Arti he did it all, partly to rile her on and partly because this was the only way he could engage her without giving anything away for the cameras.
That day was going to be representative of a crucial phase in their relationship, for Shehnaaz the taunt of Paras and Mahira being called fake and jealous stuck in a very raw way, she could not unsee Sidharth and Arti getting cosy either. For Sidharth seeing asim and rashmi use her and belittle her by always bringing Paras into the fore and also seeing how easily she fell into that trap frustrated him to no end. But strip away all this, the truth remained that both of them wanted an assurance from each other, an assurance that quite frankly was unnecessary and had well passed its times because they over and over showed it to each other that emotionally,mentally and physically they had surrendered to the other but through the fog of the pressure of the game, their own insecurities about themselves and the crowded space they were in that which should have been obvious was not.
Their gnawing at each other insecurities continued well into the next day, and as Sidharth had rightly judged, the show both within the house and what was being aired greatly run on these two and there were literally no private moments between the two of them and now shefali bagga had entered into the equation making things worse. Since morning Shehnaaz was going about doing all the duties as assigned to her and this was getting on Sidharth's nerves as he saw it as her going out of her way and obliging someone who had no value for her, what Sidharth did as his genuine concern for someone whom he considered his own Shehnaaz misconstrued as being driven by Paras's agenda against her. The painful gridlock was that both were right from their own perspectives. Somehow realising that Shehnaaz was vulnerable Sidharth went out of his way to snuggle upto her and in spite of the irritation of having bagga and others as audience he did try and get his point across to her, but this was the frustration and the admirable thing about the girl he had fallen hook line and sinker for....she never gave into anything or admitted anything that did not come naturally to her.
While Sidharth assumed that his efforts to reconcile and consolidate were grand and sufficient all Shehnaaz could see was that the unwholesome quartet of Paras, Mahira, Arti and Shefali.z started assuring they encircled him and felt that they would fan the flames of the burning rift between them. Again both were not entirely wrong. While they were sure of their feelings for the other, they were not sure of the reciprocity and hence the insecurity. Things got really out of hand when Shehnaaz finally burst open and did which was both deeply hurting and embarrassing to Sidharth, she came and thumped her hands on the wooden frame and also came undone with her emotions in front of an audience amongst whom not one had good intentions for both of them. While she did that he felt caged, caged by his inability to openly go after her, caged by the frustration and disappointment he felt at not naturally being on the same page as her, caged by the hurt and betrayal he felt when he saw all the others rush to mock her more than console her. He hated all of it and was actually relieved when the makers had called him for some more IV fluids as he was running low on energy. The time away in the confession room alone gave him the rare opportunity to be away and yet look at things from a larger perspective and he then realised that Shehnaaz was insecure but at the same time he also realised that her insecurity could not drive his game. This was a tougher battle than he had anticipated. As he sauntered out prepared to be more patient and level with her, both his face and his heart smiled in gladness and relief to find her standing just at the door waiting for him to be back. He fell a little more in love with her because of how selfless she presented herself and never one to allow her ego to come in between them. He then and there decided to try and dumb things down for her and very explicitly clarify things so that there would be no further misunderstanding between the two of them.
They had multiple rounds of conversation ending with both of them sitting on the light blue couch, him with a cup of tea in his hands. After everything was said Shehnaaz felt a pang of loneliness creep into her, she suddenly and strangely felt unsure....she knew he would not use her for the game but what if he was stringing her along and the irony of the situation was that the only person who could comfort her and set these insecurities to rest was Sidharth himself, so she did what she knew as the only balm for her discomfort, she thre herself wholly onto Sidharth. His words and attitudes confused her at times but his touch, his touch always comforted her and she needed that assurance right now, so she slowly got up, took the cup from his hand, pulled out his folded leg that rest on the couch and settled herself in between his lifted leg that was rested on the couch and the other leg that was placed on the ground. She nestled herself there and tugged her arm against his bent thigh and pulled his other arm which was resting on the couch and brought it around her waist, Sidharth instinctively wrapped his bent leg also around her and further tucked her into himself with his free arm and tucked his chin into her neck and hair as she tilte pd her head to give him access to it. This is what she could bank on, physically the man would more than take her in, she wished his emotions, his thoughts and his expressions were just as easily accessible.She cupped his face with her hands and and gently threaded her fingers through his hair and whispered "nahi dekh payee teko Sidharth Arti ke saath, mujhay nahi acha lagega hai ki hamaaray beech mein baathein chal rahi hai phir bi tu in logo ke paas jaa raha hai aur voh log mera mazaak udha rahaein hain." Saying this her breathe hitched because Sidharth was nuzzling her neck and he spoke in response and as his lips moved against his skin it did things to her that both satiated a d ignited emotions within her "chup karo Shehnaaz, just pls let me exhale into you and just let go, mere liye bhi yeh sab asaan nahi hai. Please Shehnaaz I just want to be with you and not worry about anything else. Please hmm?" Saying this he pulled her flush against him and she could feel his arousal and she gasped "Sidharth bebu koi bhi aa saktha hai, dekh lega koi, chod mein seat pe baithi hoon" and the more she tried to wriggle out, the more he clung on to her and he even started nibbling onto her neck "Shehnaaz you are the forbidden fruit right now, jaan lelegi tu baby. I know exact,y what I want to do with you but we are so far from being able to. Ugh" he made a guttural sound and held her waist and made her stand up, he adjusted himself such that he took the outer rim of the seat and made her sit on the inside and casually smoothed her hair and face back into decency and caught her looking intently at him, he couldn't help but laugh out loud "kya hua gadhee aisay kyun dekh rahi hai, Jaisay ke havas mein kha jaayegi tu" and when he said that she watched her go all crimson and she buried her face into the crook of his arms and he gathered her in as she said "Sidhaaaaaarth mujhay pata nahi sharm aati hai jab tu aisay baatein karat hai" and the rumbling of his laughter that echoed from within him that she could hear and his arms that held her next to his heartbeat, they were all the balm she needed.
Of course this, being them, was not a luxury they could afford and not many would let them have their time alone as we,,. They heard Arti walk upto them and unsolicited sat on the empty seat and not so subtly checked the cosy way they were nestled into the other, Sidharth his leg crossed across his knee and his arm around Shehnaaz pulling her into a hug and Shehnaaz with her knees tucked upto herself and body curled into Sidharth, if it was a well wisher it would have not been as awkward and Shehnaaz felt a tad bit uncomfortable with the scrutiny that they were subject to, she tried to extricate herself only to pleasantly find that Sidharth tucked his chin over her head and held her that much more tightly, almost saying that no one could dictate or alter what he felt towards her and that he or them were not be sullied because of anything or anyone else. Abruptly and entirely out of spite Arti asked "Sana tera haath mein sachi laga ya phir Sidharth ka attention ke liye yeh drama tha?" And she fake laughed and looked at Sidharth desperately hoping he would concur with her, but Sidharth who only wanted Shehnaaz right now was irritated and as most times when it was Arti he just closed his eyes in resignation and allowed her to ramble on as he with his fingers slowly caressed Shehnaaz's forearm and he almost grinned when he heard Shehnaaz say "achaw tabhi toh sochoon ke X-ray vision sey meko check out kar rahi hain." Before she could continue the housemates were asked to get into the house as the creatives had some work outside.
As they got up Sidharth mumbled into Shehnaaz's ears "baby I am going to sleep early, will you come soon? Aaj daal peenay ka mann Kar raha hai" saying this he went ahead leaving a visibly embarrassed Shehnaaz who was trying desperately to respond to the inquisition by Arti as to what Sidharth was saying. Shehnaaz in nervous anticipation, eager to be with Sidharth got herself ready for bed and quickly snuggled into him and she asked him "doctors ne kya bola? Aur kitnay din drips chadayenge?" Saying this she started threading her fingers through his hair and smoothing his forehead as well in a loop of a motion, "tu aisay karti rahegi na phir drips ki zaroorat nahi padegi, this is so therapeutic Shehnaaz.thank you baby"
"Haaye thank you kyun bol Raha hai nonsense, tere saath yeh Sab karna mujhay bohot special Lagta hai. Tu khadoos toh hai hee lekin tere life mein jo ladies hai na unkay liye itna soft ho jaata hai na, voh bohot special aur rare hai sidharth." Saying this she looked into his eyes and was taken aback by the vulnerability she found in his expression, almost mirroring hers. And she smiled because a naughty glint had taken over his face as he said "abay toh soft honay ke alava aur koi option hai mere paas. Mummy sey leke, aur meri joh mahaan deviyan doh behenein aur Jab Socha ke idhar aakay thoda apna attitude jamaooon aur ab tu, tum logon ke saamnay saala soft hokay bhi yeh haal, agar mein bechaara apni asliyat par aagaya toh Phir apnee toh band bhajthee na? Isiliye kullu is soft saala, samjhi" saying this he looked up at her on,y to find a strange and a melancholic expression on her face. He furrowed his brows questioning the same and she shook her head in response and further added "Nahin ek min ke Liye Acha lagga kay tunay mujhay tere family ke saath list me in rakha" saying this she had a slight glint of tears and and embarrassed smiles as she but her lower lip and met his eyes with this truth. He smiled fondly as it felt nice to see how special that was to her, because it was special to him. He now truly considered her as a part and parcel of the women in his life, women he was smack down proud of and he was so grateful that life had accorded him this girl who would worthily fit into the others, he sighed desperately hoping she has herself and the other three would see it that way too. For now taking advantage of the fact that the lights were now off he covered themselves with the blanket and whispered "don't bite your lips like that Shehnaaz, it makes me want to do much more!" Saying that he latched on to her lips with his and tried to communicate the emotions of homecoming that he felt with her and just before sleeping he told her "baby for now don't overthink anything, enjoy the moment, it is special because you are special"
Guys truly sorry that my updates are so slow in the coming. Don't have any other reason other than life, two young kids and homeschooling and running the kitchen, it all adds to the delay. So pls stick with me even if the updates are slow. Hoping they are worth it.thank you for supporting the story thus far,