Caught in a Lie ~ h.s.

♕ XXVI ♕

Without another word from anyone in the dining room, Harry excuses us. He leads me through his sister's home to the stairs in the foyer. As we climb, the conversations happening between his family and Louis turn to whispers and I can't help but suspect their talking about us behind our backs. Soon enough their whispers turn into silence once we've travelled far enough away.

My eyes fit up to Harry's muscular back, admiring the way his frame moves up a flight of stairs. I welcome the sight, hoping that it'll take my mind off what is about to happen.

Will we fight or handle this like civilized adults? What if our conversation goes horribly wrong and this is the last we'll ever see of each other? I don't think my heart can handle not having him in my life. I could barely go a few weeks without him in my life, whether that be at my side or just a phone call away. I was miserable, hollow even. My heart felt heavy, yet empty at the same time. It's a feeling I didn't even know existed and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I know that I won't be able to go through all of that again and I'll do anything to avoid it.

"Hey." I nearly jump out of my skin when I hear Harry's voice in close proximity to me. At some point during my internal battle with my emotions I must've stopped dead in the upstairs hall, just staring blankly at the ground. One second I was following behind Harry and the next he's reaching out to grasp my hand. "Why are you crying?"

I'm crying?

I hadn't even noticed the dampness upon my face. Had the tears started falling earlier or just when his hand met mine? Surely his gentle touch was taking a toll on my emotions and didn't help the fact that tears were just cascading down my cheeks.

"I don't know." It's the best answer I can come up with.

Although he can see right through my lie, he simply ignores my answer and leads me into the guest bedroom. He softly shuts the door behind us and leads me over towards the queen sized bed, sitting us both down on the edge, our knees practically touching due to how close we're sat.

"Mabel, I just want you to be honest with me, that's all I've ever wanted." I can't find it in me to look over at him. His soft voice too much to handle already; I can't imagine the toll a look would have on me.

"I didn't want everything to change between us." I admit with a shaking voice. "I liked having you to myself, as selfish as that is. I liked knowing that no one knew about you and I, not because I was ever ashamed, but because of how quiet it was. I liked the little bubble we were in and how protected I felt. I know that it was wrong to lie to you, but it wasn't done in a malicious way. I wanted to protect you too." I suck in a ragged breath, my chest feeling as if it's on fire due to the nature of this conversation and the speed I'm speaking at. "The world is a dangerous place in general, but when you're mixed up with someone like me, it's worse. Not just in a physically dangerous sense either; this life takes a mental and emotional toll on someone and I didn't want that for you."

"Ma-"

"Please, just let me get everything off my chest first." I beg, finally looking up into those emerald eyes. He's silent, but nods. "I was also really scared. It got to a point where ever day I woke up wanting to tell you more than I did the day before, but it was almost too late. I'd dug myself so deeply into that lie that I couldn't fathom losing you. I didn't want to lose you. I had fallen so deeply in love with you that I telling you who I really am would have destroyed everything we had.

"Our relationship wasn't totally built on lies either. I had lied about who I was, but my feelings were 100% real, they still are. And these past few weeks have been the worst weeks of my entire life. I'm in so much pain without you and I'm not trying to guilt you into feeling the same way; I just need you to know. I love you, Harry. I love you more than I've ever loved anything in this world. I am hopelessly, painfully in love with you. I understand if you want to continue hating me, but just know that I'm so incredibly sorry for everything and how much I love you."

I'm sobbing by this point, full-on ugly crying. Never have I felt so relieved, yet terrified in my entire life. I want him to say something, but at the same time I don't want to know what he's going to say. I half expect him to throw me out or sit there in silence with me, awkward silence that is. I don't expect him to pull me against him with his strong arms encircling my frame and holding me tight as I cry, but that's exactly what he does.

"Shhh," he breathes us, rubbing his hand up and down my back to try and silence my sobs. Unfortunately, I've been so desperate for this reaction that my crying only gets worse. I'm sure I've soaked his shirt with my tears by now. "I don't hate you, Mabel. I was so angry when I found out and I wasn't in a good place when we talked last. I understand why you did it, even though it was kind of fücked up and I don't necessarily agree with all of your actions, but I understand.

"And you're right, everything would have changed between us, but that doesn't mean it would have necessarily been for the worst. I can't promise you I wouldn't have been angry, but we probably could have talked like adults rather than what had occurred."

"You should hate me."

"You're right, but for some reason I can't find it in me to hate the girl I love." My breath, and my sobs, get caught in my throat at his words. Every so slowly my face is peeled from the croke in his neck, my eyes meeting his.

"You love me?"

"Yeah, I don't understand it either." The corner of his mouth twitches upward, mine following in suit.

Today didn't go anything close to how I had imagined it would have, but I couldn't be more grateful. We were being civilized with each other. He loves me and I love him. Sure, our problems are in no way solved, but we're one step closer to finding the answers we need; perhaps therapy would be a good option for us.

I'm afraid to ask my next question, but I know I'll regret it if I don't.

"So, what happens now?" 

♕♕♕

i'm really sorry i haven't posted in forever. i've fallen out of love with this story, or maybe i'm just going through a period where i'm un-motivated. sorry if this chapter isn't 100% up to your standards. 

there will only be one more chapter left, to wrap everything up.

thank you to those of you who have read and have fallen in love with mabel and harry's "fairytale" love story xx