DEATH BATTLE

Episode 4: Guts vs Batman

Boomstick: With a single swing of Dragonslayer, Guts can cut through a man wearing heavy armor, and the sword'll even continue its destructive path to kill anyone unlucky enough to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Wiz: The Dragonslayer has even been bathed in so much demonic blood over Guts's many demon kills that it now exists on both the physical and astral planes of existence...somehow. Meaning it is capable of harming any supernatural beings.

Boomstick: If you have the Dragonslayer, you don't need to call the Ghostbusters. Not that anyone calls those guys anymore...

Wiz: Guts is a monster in combat. He's killed a hundred soldiers in a single sitting, slew over a thousand demons, and once jumped into the mouth of a supposed sea god, fought its way through it, and killed it from within.

Boomstick: Guts will do ANYTHING to defeat his foes and gain an advantage in battle, even if it means getting himself impaled and even setting himself on fire. And this guy's survivability is insane. Maybe we should have pitted him against Harry and Marv.

Wiz: Boomstick!

Boomstick: *grumble* Fine! Anyway, as I was saying, Guts somehow always survives after putting himself in life-threatening situations. He's tanked a thousand supernatural punches AT ONCE, fallen hundreds of feet, gotten stabbed through the face, and even run over by this...thing going supersonic speeds. Oh, and Guts can dodge F*CKING LIGHTNING.

Wiz: But his disregard for his own safety can be costly. Honestly, the only reason he's still alive is due to his anime-level willpower and pure dumb luck.

Boomstick: And if Guts has taken too much punishment in base form, he wears the Berserker Armor, the most insane battlegear in anime land!

Wiz: The Berserker Armor grants the wearer immunity to pain by sealing off his nervous system. This allows Guts to break his limits in base form and fight at his fullest potential, though this can greatly damage his body.

Boomstick: With the Berserker Armor, Guts can swing harder than Ragna or Cloud or any other dude who's got a big sword, though the force can break his own arm. But fret not: when this happens, the cursed armor will literally rip and pierce his body to pin the bones and muscles back in place. And since the armor doesn't make you feel pain, this can be done repeatedly.

Wiz: But the armor doesn't actually heal Guts, it just holds him together. This can be dangerous, since someone manages to wound Guts, the armor does not close the wound. Also, the armor just makes Guts immune to pain.

Boomstick: Also, the armor kinda drives Guts insane and sever all his ties to morality and restraint. That's where the cursed Berserker Armor takes its name.

Wiz: Clad in the Berserker Armor, Guts is violent and completely out of control. But even if he doesn't wear the armor, Guts is more than just a force to be reckoned with.

Boomstick: Three little pigs built houses. A big bad wolf killed them all. The big bad wolf...is Guts.

Guts, his mighty blade drawn, approaches a group of knights. The knights quiver in fear.

Guts: My sword has gotten very dull. However, it's three times as thick and does three times the damage of a normal sword. You better pray you die quickly, or this could be painful.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

BATMAN

Wiz: Born as the only son of the Wayne family, Bruce would have a good childhood--

Boomstick: Aaaaaand some guy with a gun shoots his parents dead right before his eyes and his life turns around just like that. We all know Bruce Wayne's backstory, don't we?