My Teacher, Louis Tomlinson

Chapter 16- Things best unspoken

IMPORTANT A/N: This chapter may be particularly triggering for cutting and rape due to the somewhat-graphic descriptions. Read at your own risk.

Skye's POV:

School the next day is fine. We're told about a speech in English that we'll have to do in a week, which to me seems like a really short time to prepare.

So that's stressful.

Mr. Tomlinson tells everyone their partners and I look over at Ashton. He flashes me a smile and gives me a thumbs up. My heart skips a beat. He's really cute. How have I not noticed him before?

After our usual afternoon tea, Mr. Tomlinson lets me stay an hour or so while he finishes up some work. I am forever grateful.

When I get home, though, Gary has a couple beers in hand and I am disappointed to find another man in the house. Boy, really. He looks about 25.

"Skylynn, this is Joe. He lives across the street."

He's attractive.

"Well, don't be shy, say hello."

"Hi." I say before making a beeline for my room.

"NO!" Gary screams, taking me by surprise.

I quickly duck down, covering my head and curling into a ball on the ground. I've found this to be the best defensive position in case of attack.

"Come talk to the guest."

I hesitantly walk over and sit on the sofa. Joe smiles warmly at me. I shyly smile back.

The three of us actually have a civil conversation for a while. I check the clock. 4:00 pm. The girls don't get home until 5:00 or 5:30.

I excuse myself to the bathroom and they don't protest. When I return, Gary is gone. \

"Where's my uncle?" I ask.

"Oh, he'll be back in a little, I think." Joe says, standing up and walking over to me.

All of a sudden, his lips are on mine, roughly pressing against me. I taste what I assume is weed. I push him away quickly.

"What the actual fuck?" I say angrily.

"Woah woah woah, Skylynn. What do you think you're doing?" Gary says, out of nowhere. He has returned with a couple more beers.

"He tried to kiss me!" I tell him.

This is mad.

"Listen." Gary grips my shoulders tightly. "Him and I have a deal. I get what I need from him, and he gets you for the next hour. Okay?"

"WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'M NOT JUST SOME—"

White hot pain flashes through me as his hand connects with my cheek.

"You are my child, now. You do what I say. It's him, or me." He finishes. Then he turns to Joe, still roughly gripping my arm, digging his nails in until I whimper in pain. "Her room is straight down that hallway, if you'd like some privacy." Gary says, pushing me towards Joe. He catches me before taking my wrist more gently than Gary and pulling me with him to the guest room.

"Listen. I really need this. I need you." Joe says, pushing the door closed and softly holding my shoulders. "I can make this good for the both of us if you don't struggle." He says as I try desperately to get out of his grip.

He's hot, but not that hot.

And I'm tired of being used.

He kisses me again, pressing his tongue against my lips until he forces my mouth open by pinching my butt simultaneously. He's a little less forceful than my dad and uncle, which is nice.

It's still rape.

He says things to try to comfort me throughout everything. He shushes me, tells me to calm down, saying, "It'll be hard for you to enjoy it if you keep crying", or "Shh, don't be that way, babe." He just doesn't get it, does he?

"Please don't do this to me." I whimper.

He shushed me, and that was that.

He kissed my cheek before leaving, which I found odd.

I quickly changed, feeling like I needed a million showers but not being able to take one until after dinner (probably). I felt gross inside and out.

~~

The rest of the night was uneventful, and so was the following week. The speech was approaching fast, though, coming up on Thursday. I was a decent writer, but my social anxiety would be a killer. I even approached my English teacher about it, but he told me to stop being a wimp because everyone is afraid of talking in front of the class.

That sure boosted my confidence.

When the dreaded day finally arrived, I was terrified. Gary had given me a rough time the night before, hitting me and kicking me because I didn't clean for him. I should've known.

Well, I fucked up my speech. I stuttered, I coughed, I stumbled over words. I forgot parts, I shook, I screwed myself over. Everyone laughed when I dropped my notecards. I felt like that hated nerd in movies.

"Wow, you weren't kidding about that anxiety!" My teacher announced with a laugh as I finished my speech.

I was on the verge of tears, so I excused myself to the bathroom. I grabbed the pair of scissors from my backpack before I left though, full on knowing my motives.

When I got to the bathroom I was crying. I had been strong enough to not cut after last night's beating, but now I'm not strong all. I'm weak. I'm stupid. I'm awkward. I'm hopeless.

For each insult I thought of, I left a long cut. The scissors hurt a lot more than my usual razor, too, but they left less cuts after each slice.

I'm useless.

I'm annoying.

I'm ugly.

The blood began to collect and run down my wrist as I held it over the toilet.

I'm fat.

I'm horrible.

I'm a lost cause.

I watched it drip as I squeezed my arm to make more blood come out.

I'm—

All of a sudden thestall door opened.

A/N: Cliffhanger! And look who's updating again :)