Letter #12

11 6 2
                                    

Dear Samuel,

Thank you for your letter.

I was glad to receive it, albeit a little nervous given everything I wrote that day — although my recollection of what I wrote is a little hazy at the moment. Your words were comforting in the chaos that is my mind at the moment. Since the attack, my mind is foggy and I get headaches from looking at the light for too long. The one thing I crave more than anything is the one thing holding me back.

Yet, when I reread your letter, it clears the fog for just a moment. It allows me to think clearly and everything comes into focus once more. I'm grateful to have those moments of clarity, no matter how small they might be.

You haven't let me down with the scarce information you have presented, though I won't try to hide how much it does hurt. Despite how much my trust was damaged, I still find that I would miss your letters. Before Victoria showed up to hand me your letter, I was upset that it would be a while until I got to read another letter from you.

In one of your letters, you described our correspondence as being like a bridge, a connection, and I now see what you mean. The thought of not getting another letter from you, of not being able to write to you, hurt me more than the punches.

As for my recovery, it is no doubt going to take time, but I am willing to push through the hard parts if it means we can finally meet in person. I want to see the person who somehow knows me after only a few exchanges. It would be nice to finally have a discussion face-to-face, though I hope what happened to me isn't the reason why you are suddenly open to the idea.

Still, I hope to see you soon so long as my recovery continues as it should. It is a meeting that will push me through each step no matter how much it pains me.

You have given me something to look forward to at the end of what I expect will be a long and drawn out process.

Yours,

Eli

~~~

First Published - April 20th, 2024

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