Beautifully entwined

chapter one: glance back

New school, new faces, new town, yet same me. 

My family had decided to pack up everything we owned and buy a new house to follow my sister to college. Couldn't leave the GOLDEN child I suppose. 

I had randomly picked my classes because I never had this many options back in the small town I used to live in.  The only class that I remember picking is choir. I had never sung in front of anyone besides my family, but they all told me that I was better off with my mouth closed. Yet I loved singing so I just had to pick choir. I am so happy I choose that class because that's where I met her. 

When I met her it wasn't something out of a movie, no that wouldn't do any justice to it. The whole world came to a standstill, time itself seemed to just turned into an abyss. The only thing it seems to be capable of was to allow me to hear the echoing of how fast my heart rate is. The only thing my eyes were able to focus on was her, a complete stranger had caught my attention. She came in strutting into class, she must have felt my eyes prying at her skin trying to pick out any little details.

She came late, and I had been 10 minutes early. I just remember thinking she's living in her world, and I just so happen to be lucky enough to be in the background. She was wearing a Slytherin skirt and an oversized hoodie. Her curly hair was in this big messy caramel bun on top of her head, with some spilled hair framing her face. Her big brown eyes looked uninterested as she walked by me. 

I didn't blame her for not looking I had made it my job to lay low. I wanted to get through my school year with no one noticing me. I didn't want attention because then I would have to play pretend. I was getting tired of doing that. 

"Sorry I got lost.", I would have never imagined her voice to sound anything like that. It was smoother than honey, yet deep and calming. So how did she make those four words drip with sarcasm?

She didn't even wait for a response and took a seat. I wanted so badly to talk to her. She was so confident and I was... well I was me. I was this person who made it their goal to act like the definition of nice and sweet. For years I had not had an actual conversation with anyone. The only talking I would do would consist of me being forced to speak to my family, " How was your day? " "Fine." 

My family and I never had a close relationship, and that really affected the way they saw me. I ask my mother one day why the prince always saves the princes? Why can't a princess save a princess, or why can't a prince save a prince? My mother was very religious and took this as a sign of the devil and me being turned lesbian. She was wrong cause correction I'm nonbinary gay, and that has nothing to due with me being a satanist. 

My mother convinced my dad and older sister that I was lesbian and took all electronics away from me. That meant no tv, no radio, no tablets, no watches, no computers, and no phones. She threatened to tell my younger siblings about what she "found out", but said she didn't want to traumatize them. So with no electronics and basically no family, I became dependent on books.

My life was one I didn't want, so every book I picked up and read allowed me to live one that I would want. Every book was a distraction from all those stupid assumptions, from their hate comments. I was a quiet person, I never spoke unless I was spoken to, and I cried when speaking to my parents.

It wasn't until this year that I was allowed to get a phone, only cause I was being given more independence, thanks to my dad. I downloaded a lot of music and found that alternative was my favorite type. I had this whole different personality that no one knew of, not my family, and not any friends cause I didn't have any. 

The weeks went on in school and I blended in completely with the crowd of students. I didn't speak to anyone, but that's how I made it through my day until I got home. I was fine with that because that was how I got through before.  

Yet every time I would see that girl walk past me I would just hope that she would notice me. Just a glance would do. Please glance back at me. I still couldn't understand why I found her so interesting. I have never felt like this for anyone else, yet I was okay with that