The Badass Nerd

Flings and PJs

I wasn't in a mood to cook. I wasn't in a mood for anything. I went straight to my room and went inside the bathroom. I stripped off my clothes and showered. It took me about forty five minutes to drain the sticky flour from my hair. I almost got irritated and cut my hair but I kept my cool till the end. I wrapped myself up in one towel and dried my hair with the other one. I let my hair dry naturally. I didn't have anywhere to go. I wanted to let my girls know but things are already tense because of Mark's accident so I decided to let it go. I put my ketchup filled clothes in the machine and changed into more comfortable PJs and lose t-shirt.  When I went down, my mom was already making dinner for us. Good for me because I was not feeling like cooking today. I know my mom will guess something is wrong with me and I don't plan on hiding it anyway. She is the perfect person to talk about this and she can tell me if I did the right thing. Not that I can reverse whatever happened but I will know what to do and how to think in these kind of situations in future.

"Hey Peach!" She said not looking at me. She was making tortilla sandwich with three fillings but I was way too depressed to be excited about it. I kept thinking about Carter's face and how sad he looked. I could see the emotions in his eyes change from desire to confusion to hurt. I wanted to ease his sadness, I wanted to do anything I could to make him feel better but it just wasn't in my control. I want to trust him but it's not that easy. I am afraid that in every intimate moment we share, I won't be able to shrug the feeling that I am just another one of his accomplishments. 

"Peach, are you okay?" Mom asked me pulling me out of my thoughts. I told her whatever happened today including Mark's accident and the almost kiss I shared with Carter. 

"Okay first things first. Is Mark okay?" She asked me after a while.
"Yeah, he is fine. Emma was talking care of him. His parents are also there. He will probably get discharged by tomorrow morning." 
"Okay that's good news. Now, tell me how do you feel about Carter? We need to sort things out honey." And I did. She listened to everything I said and nodded furiously.
"Peach, whatever you are doing is fair and only logical. Sweetie I won't say that he should feel okay with it. He probably is devastated right now but we can only hope that he is understanding. It's a reach but if he really loves you, he will figure out a way. I know its not possible but try not to think about it. Just remember that the wrong kind of love can destroy you to your core. Take your time to realize if he really is your right love." She said and I smiled sadly at her. 
"Thanks mom." I said and ate in silence. As soon as I was done, I went upstairs and decided to bury myself in the pile of works. I decided to complete weeks worth of homework, including the ones that haven't been taught yet. I completed weeks of practical lab reports and project research. I was tired but I was afraid if I stop, Carter will haunt my thoughts and that's the last thing I want. I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard text alert tone. I picked my phone from the night stand and there was Carter's message on it. My heart hammered against my chest. I was terrified to my bones to open it. With shaking hands I tap on the screen and read his message.

Gray: Are you busy? Okay not very informative but not aggressive either, I thought. I looked at the pile of work I had done to distract myself from him.
Liv: No
Gray: I am outside your house. Will you come down? I bit my lip in happiness. He was polite and he didn't seem angry either. 
Liv: Yeah. I will be out in five. I quickly went to my wardrobe and picked out my favorite black narrow fir jeans paired with a gray sweatshirt.

"Mom, Gray is here. I will tell you all the details when I will be back." I shouted before leaving without waiting for her reply. He was leaning on his car facing towards my house waiting patiently for me. He was wearing black jeans and dark green casual t-shirt. He looked like a billionaire model waiting for his girl. I blushed at that thought and quietly walked to him.

"I need your help with something." He said with a blank expression. I bit my lip anxiously and he stared at my lips.
"Am I allowed to ask what do you need help with?" I asked and he sighed. He pulled his hair back and I imagined him doing that in slow motion. He looked like a rich mafia boss or something like that.
"You were right. I made many mistakes today. First, I shouldn't have tried to kiss you without your consent. That was totally wrong. I got caught up in the moment."
"No actually, you know what happens when someone kisses me without my consent. You saw the guy on the floor with his hands holding his crotch. I would like to be kissed by surprise." I said and he smirked.
"Noted. Second, I do have a player image in my previous as well as this current school. Although, I told you the reason behind it, still I don't see why you should trust me. It's fair on your part. Which is why, I need your help." He said and looked at me hopefully. 
"With what?"
"I am going to apologize to every girl I ever screwed."

.........

Carter understands man! He seems like a Prince Charming to me XOXO