A Court of Iron and Shadows

We're All A Little Bit Broken Inside

Hey guys, I'm so sorry I haven't updated sooner, things have been really hectic around here. I just realized, that it's been a month since I've updated, today. On the dot. The CHANCES! School is really stressful right now, so don't expect weekly updates or anything, I'll get around to it when I have time, I promise. Again, so sorry that I haven't updated in a while, but I have posted a new story which I'm writing with one other person, it's called Darkness Collides and is a crossover between Shadow Hunters and Acotar. Now, on with the show...

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Everyone whips their heads in my direction, staring straight at me. Playing the meek human girl, I shift uncomfortably, although I shoot Cassian a smirk when I catch his eye. They snap to attention, standing up and ushering me towards one of the couches, Azriel sitting next to me and Cassian across from me, simmering. Still glowering from our earlier fight. "Yes?" I ask no one in particular. No one says anything, not a sound to be heard in the room, and I sigh audibly, directing my gaze at Rhysand before speaking, "What was I to be informed or talked to about?" I ask once again. 

"Celaena, there's a high lord meeting that's taking place next week and..well, we wanted to know if you'd like to come. It's your choice completely, we won't judge if you want to stay back, but we thought we'd give you the option." Rhys says, slightly wary. Oh, he should be. I have to contain the wicked grin threatening to form on my lips, and instead wring my hands. 

"Next week? And who will be attending this meeting?" I ask

"Well, all of the high lords will be coming, and most of them chose to bring guards and a few other people--lovers and such." Feyre butts in, "It's really not that bad, a little boring, yes, but the reason we asked you if you wanted to come instead of not giving you any options is because usually, a fight breaks out during our stay. Not all of us are on..great terms, as I'm sure you'll be able to tell." She rushes. 

I make a good show of thinking about it, contemplating what could very well be the death of me--or so they thought. Yes, I had taken down their general, but a room full of the most powerful high fae in Prythian who don't like humans? I could understand their concern for a regular person. But I was no ordinary girl. Their reasoning was logically, but quite frankly, it was still insulting. 

I lean back, crossing my legs and fidgeting with my hands, averting my gaze and looking down, at the ceiling--anywhere but the expectant eyes watching me. Finally, I lean forward, bracing my elbows on my knees as I say with an unsure expression plastered onto my features, "I guess I'll come.." I trail off. 

"Are you sure? You really don't have to if you don't want to." From anyone else I would've thought what a bitch, but from Mor, her eyes full of concern and worry, I took it in stride, tilting my chin up, straightening my back. 

"Yes, I'm sure." I say, appearing more confident in my decision, when really I had known from the moment they had asked me. A way to gather more information about the land they called Prythian and to learn all the strengths and weakness' from it's leaders? Yes please. 

I quickly change the conversation, slipping into the role of the nervous girl. "So, when's dinner? I'm starving." 

At the mention of dinner, Cass' eyes light up and jumps from his place off the couch, "Yes please, let's get food, I'm starving!" He rushes out of the room, towards the dining room. 

"Cassian, you're always hungry!" Mor shouts after him, following him until their light banter could be faintly heard as we made our way towards the dining hall. As everyone makes their way towards the food, I get up from my spot on the couch, grunting slightly at my still healing wounds. 

Az's arm is instantly holding me up, steadying me, his body close to mine and I could feel the heat of his skin on my arm, his shadows drifting towards me. Giving him a soft smile, I loop my arm through his and we walk out of the room, towards the dining hall, and the food that awaited me. 

The smells of food wafted towards me, and I nearly drooled with the desire to feed myself. I curse Maeve again, my stomach still not accustomed to the usual amount that I would eat. Under different circumstances, I would stuff myself until I could barely stand, and drink my weight in wine. 

The thought of my old life quickly sobers me up, and a somber expression melts onto my face. I keep walking until I'm tugged back slightly, turning my head to look over my shoulder, seeing the Azriel stopped and is waiting for me to do so as well. 

"What?" I ask, my facial expression instantly turning neutral, careful not to reveal my secrets. He simply narrows his eyes at me for a moment before saying, 

"What's wrong." He demands, stating it as though he expecting an answer, and now. 

"Nothing." I say, cocking my head slightly at his behavior. He looks unconvinced and asks me again, this time more urgent. My bottom lip trembles slightly and small droplets fill the brim of my eyes, threatening to come loose. 

I inhale and exhale deeply, looking back at his face before he envelops me in a tight hug and my arms drop to my sides, before coming up to wrap around his waist. Even standing at my full heigh of 5'7, he still towered a head above me, about the same height as Rowan. 

At the thought of my carranam, my eyes well with tears once more, slipping free and falling onto Az's shirt. I tremble slightly, silently crying into Az's chest, before he pulls back slightly, examining my face, wiping away my tears, and brushing back my hair, giving me a sad smile. He locks a strand of golden hair between his fingers, playing with it before tucking it behind my ears. 

He doesn't ask me if I'm okay. Doesn't say anything. He knows I'm not okay, he knows I'm scarred--both inside and out. But he doesn't need to say anything. A grim understanding falls between us and he pulls back fully now, gripping my hand and giving it a light squeeze, before we continue down the hall, to satisfy my growling stomach. 

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Word Count: 1009

Again, sorry for updating, I'll try and update again soon. Sorry for any mistakes, I just wrote all of this and proof read it quickly, because I'm supposed to be in bed right now, haha. Also, I know the art doesn't really fit this chapter, but I HAD to share. Anyways, you know the drill. Have a glorious day/night!!

Love, 

Hannah Elizabeth Rose