Ryeliey Gabrielle

Pride.

is the reason why im in this...

I ran away from my feelings and thoughts for a very long time… but that is exactly what I needed. How long was I stuck talking to myself about the same thing over and over again? It’s not like I could help it but still, it felt like it had become a thing to be in a room dealing with old dirty laundry that held me back from doing the things I wanted to do. What a stink of a mess it was and it was tough to clean up. I don’t remember what it was like to be in that emotional mess but I certainly remember I never wanted to feel that way ever again because it was the most painful experience of my life to this day. And I’m sure it is one of many to come.

It has been months since that miserable day had started, but it was the same day that my life actually started a new chapter of pure happiness. Bittersweet. 

Am I happy? Yeah, for the most part, I am. Am I confident? Yes, I’m getting there.
Am I proud of myself more than I have ever been in my entire life? 

YES.

Why? I got out of a mess that I thought was impossible to recover from and what did I do? I accomplished so many things in the span of a year. Not only that, I have finally been able to become honest and confrontational. I hate lies, I hate holding things in. I have moments of weakness where I let fear takeover but I feel so much discomfort when that happens that I don’t let it takeover for too long.