@Muslimah-Storyteller I maybe wrong as this is my perspective, it's how I view it. And you are angry, so it's hard for you to see this through. It's not easy to let go, it's not easy to find relief with a past that broke you. But a friend once told me, life is full of choices, it's up to us what we want to feel, what we choose to do, it's up to us to make choices at our chances. Relief is just another word you read everyday and not feel it, and it's ok. As a human, as God's best of creation, you are worthy of every good that is there, God is promising you an eternal world of paradise, if you can be worthy of that, then relief is near, you will find it. You will get over your past. You will learn to let it go. You will forget to be angry, patience can only be your companion.
And the night is darkest before the dawn, and God never fails in His promise to bring dawn everyday.