Status: A Wattpad RT courtesy of the lovely Amanda Lamb! I shan't update my status in several years. (2 weeks ago)


Name John M. Gilheany
Location UK
Member Since Feb 03, 2013
Votes Received 80
Profile Page
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It recently dawned on me (at 43) that one way or another, I’ve been writing most of my life and may as well become better at it.

I've been getting to grips with short storytelling over the past year. Most of my tales have benefited from the critiques of 'Writers Forum' competition judges whose sound advice, I've even implemented here and there. Eventually, I hope to adopt a more literary style of storytelling which would allow for all sorts of clever-clever themes, imagery, similes and suchlike ...

Meanwhile, I'm more interested in the shape of story itself. Or rather its strength: as received through just about any form of entertainment (apart from rugby commentary of course - the dark side of life in Wales!).

My favourite authors are George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, George Orwell and Noel Coward. I particularly like their letters and generally admire their work for its lucidity: a quality which I’m striving towards in my short stories. I’m also keen on the style of newspaper columnists who usually seek to be understood and keep me from retreating too far away from the 21st century!

As should Wattpad – although it's easy to spend too much time around here rather than focus on ways of improving one's craft and appreciating the work of ... well, proper authors (9 times out of 10) let's face it! 

And yet how enjoyable, it surely is, to overlook the shameless typos of a texted tale which seizes the storytelling moment; than to indulge so many a published author peddling the same sorry dross, year after year.

And so with that plainly jaundiced and none-too-novel rant, I now present you with my own selection of disparate tales (of woe, mainly) laced with humour (here and there) which may prove enriching in some worthy way ... my lovely trickle of readers!

Till next time or other,


Artistic Dabblings:

(Profile pic:


The Ascendant

The Ascendant

General Fiction #527
24 parts / 39 pages, updated Jul 29, 2014PG-13
How one man schemed his way through corporate culture of the '00s. It's not what you know, it's what they think you know ...
475 reads votes 13 comments 3
Blackadder lll v Beau Brummell

Blackadder lll v Beau Brummell

5 parts / 6 pages, updated Feb 05, 2014PicturesCompleted
As the 1790s reach a raucous end, one young idler invents celebrity culture. Beau Brummell is seriously stylish, witheringly witty and ultra urbane: qualiti... read more
357 reads votes 35 comments 45
'Who's your fat friend?' - the impudent humour of Beau Brummell

'Who's your fat friend?' - the impudent humour of Beau Brummell

3 pages, updated Feb 02, 2014Completed
A look at the sayings which saw George Bryan Brummell's status soar as a Regency wit. As well as some of the reasons for their lack of everyday appeal, quotability and fame.
459 reads votes 4 comments 8
The Clairvoyant Atheist

The Clairvoyant Atheist

4 pages, updated Nov 03, 2013PG-13Completed
Is Mike in the grips of hallucination, or haunted by 'Gerald' ~ an 18th century fop? It's not an easy one to grapple with in the midst of a ruthless hangover but maybe metaphysics can be put to the test along the way!
213 reads votes 6 comments 7
Middle-Lane Drivers' Manifesto

Middle-Lane Drivers' Manifesto

1 page, updated Sep 16, 2013PGPicturesCompleted
Ever been baffled by moronic motorway users while making decent use of the public highway? Or wonderered what thoughts may even exist within their decept... read more
30 reads votes 1 comments 0
Synthpop for Life!

Synthpop for Life!

4 pages, updated Apr 27, 2013VideoCompleted
"So why exactly do guitars still exist in post-industrial society? I thought we'd put a stop to all that by 1983?" - Eric ('The Autocrats') - Electroscape Fanzine message board, 28/01/2013 Welcome to the sounds of the future ... again!
42 reads votes 1 comments 0
Christian Vegetarianism? -  some reflections and quotations

Christian Vegetarianism? - some reflections and quotations

2 parts / 2 pages, updated Apr 17, 2013VideoCompleted
A handful of thoughts on the resurgence of a straightforward, yet complex lifestyle tradition.
261 reads votes 10 comments 11
A Motley Cast Upon A Stage of Stone

A Motley Cast Upon A Stage of Stone

5 pages, updated Apr 13, 2013PG-13Completed
Take a trip through the hoardings of a bustling British building site of the late 80s. If it all gets too much, you can always nip back out again throu... read more
19 reads votes 0 comments 0
Rites of Deliverance

Rites of Deliverance

7 parts / 7 pages, updated Apr 11, 2013Completed
How long can a man live with a hideous secret before the truth finally capsizes every aspect of his existence? For Father Colgan, a lifelong priest of the Archdioces... read more
174 reads votes 2 comments 0


5 pages, updated Apr 06, 2013PG-13PicturesCompleted
Amidst the embers of an ancient conflict where sides survive only in the shadow of strategic motives ... what secrets lurk to oppose and unite the remaining combatants?
68 reads votes 0 comments 0

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