Sugar and Spice [BeyBlade Fan Fiction]

#23

Song for the chapter: Carried Away (Gossamer) by Passion Pit

Nikita's POV

I sang my heart out on the karaoke. It was the first time I sang in public - I don't have a nightingale's voice after all. I was too sad to actually mind any embarrassment that might come from it. But I suppose my fake smiles and the highs and lows of the song compensated for my bad acting. 

I smiled widely singing it, shaking my body just how I knew people found it attractive. I made sure to turn my head around so everyone saw my accentuated dimples and high cheekbones. As always, I used my goods to their best. I almost felt like a rock star, leading the crowd despite my mediocre voice.

As I finished people clapped and smiled good naturely. Some people complimented me, shaking hands and the night ended in laughter. But to me the laughter was bitter. 

At around half past eleven we left the restaurant, I in slightly good spirit than I entered. But what was the result? My spirits and good mood were crushed within an instant. Raul and the boys were talking under a tree at the path where our wings diverged. 

"Did you girls have a good night?" Ray asked stifling a yawn. 

"It was perfect!" Hilary squealed. 

"You didn't miss me Hil?" Tyson asked feigning hurt.

"Why would I?" Hilary raised a brow.

"Ouch! My heart won't be able to take this blow!" Hilary scrunched her nose and hit him playfully on his chest. We were about to go to our respective paths and hopefully have a good night's sleep. 

"Good night guys!" Julia waved at us all. I was standing beside Kai. I expected that almost like  a regular night he would walk by me. Instead Julia walked towards him. He stepped closer like it was normal. She raised her mouth towards him and he captured her lips in a lingering, goodnight kiss. 

And then she was gone. No one paid attention - like it was nothing out of normal... Kai too turned around and walked beside Ray as they resumed talking what they must have been conversing about before. 

"Nick!" Max shook me by my wrist. "Let's go! It's getting late."

I was lost beyond words as we walked back to the suite. I went to my room and stripped out of the tight fucking dress. I slipped on a comfortable Pajama shirt and pant and went out in the shared balcony between mine and Kai's room. My last hope was crushed when he didn't come out even after twenty minutes of wait. 

I tiptoed to his door and pressed my ear against the ebony door. I could hear soft snoring and breathing sound. This time-- This time my eyes didn't sting with tears. I was fuming with rage. I had been with different boys but I had never shut him out like this. I had never stopped being his friend. 

I went back in my room and pulled open my closet. I pulled out a photo album. Each page had space for two pictures. Yet only two torn photographs were glued inside. I stared at each picture long and hard. The first one was a boy. Nine or ten perhaps. The first boy I had liked. His refusal had made me bitter and afraid of connections. But it was still a plain refusal. I had marked it a 3 out of 10 in my pain diary. 

The second page had no picture but a folded note. The first time I had a seizure. Epileptic seizures aren't generally painful in themselves. Only in few rare cases were they painful. The first one had been tough but I had still marked it a four. Not bad.

The third was another note, I had put it in after the doctor's appointment that I hated talking about. The day I had the most painful seizure yet and they had put me on an experimental medication. The doctor told my mum the medication could, most probably would, make me infertile - incapable of ever becoming a mother biologically. That was a tough emotional as well as physical blow yet it was only a six in my eyes.