Changjo met Ricky for the first time when they were 11. They weren’t Changjo or Ricky that time, they were just Choi Jonghyun and Yoo Changhyun, they were just two small boys with a big dream. It was Ricky who had first approached Changjo. “Jonghyun-sshi? I’m Yoo Changhyun. Do you want to be friends?” He had been so darn cute Changjo said yes without batting an eyelid. They talked all through practice and after practice, and Changjo felt an unlikely and inexplicable, but addictive and very strong connection to him. And when it was dark, Changjo offered to walk him home. Ricky laughed. “Oh Jonghyun, you’re too good to me.” He said, and Changjo watched his back as he walked away, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.
Everyday for the next 2 years of their trainee life, Changjo and Ricky were inseperable, sharing every ambition, happiness, problem and moment with each other. Changjo had a soft spot for Ricky, and he felt like doing anything for him. It seemed that Ricky was grateful, because every time Changjo put Ricky before himself just to see a smile on his face, he’d say “Oh Jonghyun you’re too good to me.” And everytime he’d say that, Changjo would feel that his existence was justified, though he didn’t really know why.
Even 5 years after debut he didn’t know, but he got a slight inkling on one free day after a particularly hectic week. "Jonghyun-ah." Chunji called. "What is it?" Changjo replied, pausing his pushups to address his hyung. "Do you want to go to Lotte World?" Changjo mulled over this mid pushup. "I think I'll pass." he said. He knew he'd get tempted by all the chocolate and candies and burgers and pizzas. He was on a diet, and couldn't afford the distraction. "Aww..why? It'll be so much fun! Loosen up Jonghyun." piped up Niel from his spot on a comfortable armchair beside Chunji. Changjo gritted his teeth. As usual, Niel had no clue when to shut up. "Jonghyunnie, come on! Please?" suddenly, how or when or why he didn't know, but a very beautiful, very adorable, very desperate Yoo Changhyun was in front of him, pouting his cherry lips and staring at him with round shining eyes. "I-uh..." "Please Jonghyunnie? Please?" "Um..Changhyun.." "For me?" Changjo gulped, a strange sensation bubbling in the pit of his stomach. "O-okay." he gave in. "Yayy! Oh Jonghyun, you're too good to me." Ricky beamed, blowing him a kiss. And that's when it happened. His arms buckled, heart lurched and he fell. On his face onto the floor and into the deepest abyss for Yoo Changhyun. And he realised that he was in huge trouble.
Of course Changjo didn't know what exactly that trouble was then. It wasn't until much later that he found out. "Jonghyun-ah." said Ricky, one day as they were walking back from college. It was autumn and the leaves were all different shades of red and brown, "What's the one thing you can't live without? For me, I think it's games. It's impossible for me to spend a day without playing games." he said happily, oblivious to how hard Changjo was staring at him. "You." blurted out Changjo. Ricky turned to him in surprise. "What?" "I-I-I mean I can't live without all the Teen Top members, I mean we've been together for about 7 years including trainee time right? I mean I value them a lot and I just yeah Tee-Teen Top." Changjo finished lamely. Ricky simply laughed. "But out of all the members you need me the most right?" Taking Changjo's silence as a yes, the elder laughed. "Oh Jonghyun, you're too good to me." And that's when Changjo realised that he was, without a doubt, head over heels for Yoo Changhyun.
Changjo’s love only grew as the months flew by. Ricky’s every smile, every action, everything made his head spin and his mouth run dry. And of course, there was one thing he said which always killed Changjo. The words themselves, the way he said it, everything was so beautiful that Changjo almost cried eveytime he heard it. Those words were the ones that defined their relationship in a way. Changjo was always desperate, always thirsty to hear them. Those words were his obsession.
“Oh Jonghyun, you’re too good to me.”
About 6 months from that day came Ricky's birthday. Changjo padded around the house looking for candlesticks. They had to be somewhere. He knew that they owned some because he's seen L.Joe use them for Chunji's birthday and C.A.P for Niel's. They were really fancy- gold and embellished and beautiful. He already had candles-pearly white ones which smelled like romance when you lit them-he just needed the darn candlesticks, because a romantic candlelight dinner would be absolutely incomplete and useless without candlelight. Ahh, there they were, in Chunji’s room on his shelf. Taking them off the shelf, he made his way to his room, where he had set up dinner and drinks and a cake, along with Ricky’s present. Carefully placing the candlesticks on the table, he placed the candles inside them and lit them up. Just in time too. According to the promise they had made ("Dinner? For me? Oh Jonghyun, you're too good to me."), Ricky was due for their date in 5 minutes. The next 15 for which Changjo waited were agonizing to say the least, and you’d think the Gods would’ve had some mercy. But they didn’t. Ricky didn’t show that night.
Only a after a few months did Changjo find out why. He was going to his noona’s house to visit her. As he reached her door, he heard sounds of laughter. One was his noona. The other was a boy. A very special boy. A very special boy named Ricky. “Stop laughing jagiya. I want to kiss you.” “Oh noona, you’re too good to me.” And just like that Changjo was shattered.
That night he just sat on his bed and cried. He thought those words were their special thing. He didn’t want to share, not the words and not the boy who said them. And his noona? What was she thinking? He sobbed and he sobbed, thinking of all the times they’d spent together, every nice thing he’d said, every smile, every wink, every laugh, every flying kiss every lie. He didn’t sleep. In fact, when Ricky came home at 5 in the morning with his hair dishevelled, clothes skewed, lips swollen and neck dotted with suspicious marks, Changjo didn’t even look at him. And when he said, “You waited up for me? Oh Jonghyun, you’re too good to me.” Changjo almost threw up.
Ricky found out eventually that Changjo knew about his relationship, and he was okay with it. “I trust you the most in the world.” He grinned. “Who else knows?” choked out Changjo. “Nobody. Just you.” Ricky replied. He hesitated, before saying “You won’t tell anyone, will you?” “N-no.” Changjo almost sobbed. “Oh Jonghyun, you’re too good to me.” Said Ricky, and Changjo started to cry.
“Can you do that for me, please?” Ricky pleaded with Changjo. Changjo gulped. “Please? Manager hyung can’t know about our relationship or we’ll be in trouble. Can you just lie to him saying I’m at my parents’ or something? It’s really important I go today, it’s our 6 month anniversary. I have a present for her too, and she’ll be so happy to see it!” Ricky leaned in closer. “You do want your noona to smile, don’t you?” he said slyly. Changjo pushed him away before he could get too intoxicated with his scent. “Y-yeah sure, I’ll cover for you.” “Really? Thank you Jonghyun, thank you thank you thank you! Oh Jonghyun, you’re too good to me.” Ricky said. Changjo sighed and watched his back walk away, suddenly remembering the first day they met around 8 years ago, and finally realising something he should’ve that day itself.
“You’re right, Changhyun, I am too good to you.”
