The Nearly Unbelievable Story of How Joe Saved the World

Chapter 1: Did That Really Just Happen?

     So I didn't get the chance to introduce myself earlier. Name's Joe Bigsby, custodian extraordinaire, butt of kids jokes, and heir apparent to the title of town drunk. What can I say, Life's been good to me. My favorite time killers are sharing a beer with my Dog Sparky, wondering how a catch like me doesn't have women beating the door off the hinges, and my personal favorite, crying myself to sleep. Now that all the formalities are out of the way, where was I?

     I remember, I was at work... joy. It was almost quitting time, and I was on my way to the boiler room, presumably to remove some dead creature, highlight of my day. So I had donned the elbow length, bright yellow rubber gloves that i use for this partictularly gross chore. Incedentally the only way to make a job where you scrub toilets even more emasculating, is to wear those damn gloves; may as well throw on a frilly apron while I'm at it. Anyway, in the stairway to the basement I noticed this terrible smell. It was horrible! Sort of a cross between rotting meat, and a dumpster in July. By the time I reached the door I was gagging. I didn't know what died in there, but it smelled like it had been there a while. Some days I hate this job. While mentally berating myself for dropping out of high school, i tried the door. it wouldn't open. "Odd", i said to myself. When I spoke that one word, I realized a sound had changed. You know, kind of like when you don't notice the sound of the refrigerator running, untill it stops. By this point, I'll be honest, I was creeped out a little. Couldn't have told you why, but something just didn't seem right. After a few minutes of trying to jiggle the doorknob, my imagination had totally gotten the best of me, and i admit i was pretty wigged out for no apparent reason. That's when I told myself I was being silly and decided to go find a key. As i turned to go, a new sound started coming from behind the door. a wet, slurping sound.... ~~~~~

     Chancellor Kharn approached the laboratory at a brisk pace. Usually,he would find the complete lack of a security crew comforting, normal. Under these circumstances however, Kharn recognized the need for a little muscle. Although Telani-4 was once known for its impressive military force, recent decades brought a new peaceful reform. The military was eventually dispersed, and once steadily employed soldiers were given leave to follow the path of their choosing. Most chose to leave the Telani-4 and find military employment on whatever planet they could. Some wound up in armadas on the other side of the galaxy, while fewer still remained on Telani-4 with hopes of settling in to a long, peaceful life. The Chancellor however, had no military background whatsoever. He was a political figurehead, a public relations specialist, a burecrat. All his training was in the psychological arts. Logically he recognized that psychology was the required element in this situation, for some reason though, his primal side was craving a little physical back-up.  When he arrived at the lab a small group of technicians were working to open the door.

     "No luck with the door yet, Chancellor", said the head technician." Keep at it Hal" replied Kharn. "have we established audio-visual?" he added, pointedly. "It's ready to go now sir, we figured you'd ask."  was Hal's response. Kharn touched a button that was concealed in the sleeve of his robe, and a vidscreen appeared on the door. On that screen was the image of a man, hurriedly activating all manner of gizmos in the lab, his eyes gleaming on the brink of psychosis. "Don't do this Dax, it's not worth it!!", Kharn opted for the direct approach. "It's inevitable now, Chancellor" was Dax's only reply. "Dax this is madness, please open the door!" pleaded Kharn. Without reply the image of Dax stepped to the middle of the room, made eye contact with Kharn, grinned, and vanished in a flash of light.  Chancellor Kharn bowed his head and sighed.  ~~~~~~  

     The sound coming from behind the door was nausea-inspiring, and completely unnatural. I was on the verge of running away when a distinctly human sounding moan grabbed my attention. "Shit" I said to myself. Maybe someone needed help in there, even though I couldn't imagine a plausible scenario where someone was locked in the boiler room in the first place, I decided to take action. Since I was already seriously freaked out at that point, i went ahead and kicked the door open. Thanks adrenalin. Whatever nightmarish thing I imagined was behind that door, couldn't have prepared me for the reality of what I saw in that boiler room.  My head spun, and then the darkness came.  ~~~~~~~

So there's chapter 1, hope you liked it!! Tell me what you think!