Broken Hearts, Shattered Minds.

Fallen

Chapter one:

Fallen.

He lets out a low groan as the piercing sound of the alarm wakes him from his sleep, feeling like he had only dropped off moments ago but it had to have been hours.

His eyes search blearily over the scuffed dresser to find the picture of her and Nathan lets out a sigh, rubbing his eyes and sitting up on the dirty sheets of the bed. The broken boy would yawn and stretch as he reached out an arm and would slam it down once onto the alarm clock.

One hand would run through the greasy mass of hair on the top of his head and the boy would crinkle up his nose, knowing that he really did need to shower sometime today.

The feelings within him were like they always were, deep an empty, with an absence of just about everything.

“Good morning baby…” He would mumble at the picture as he stretched, his voice cracked an tired, so different from the way that it used to be when he had her, when he felt somewhat alive.

Ilana’s POV.

8.15pm

I forced myself awake as I rolled of the bed, rubbing my eyes again as I would yawn. I hated getting up, I really really did. But hey, work called and I didn’t have the money or freedom to turn it down.

It had taken me three years to get a job, I had majored in English and the only bloody thing that I could find was a lousy Job waitressing at a sleazy bar.

I stood and looked in the mirror, yawning and stretching my hands above my head, the little swallow tattoo peeping out from the top band of my underwear. I let out a small smile, my hand going down to trace the outline of the tattoo, I remembered the summer I got that, with the boy I thought I was going to be with forever.

It hadn’t lasted though, our world had come crashing down at the end of the summer, both of us left only with matching tattoos that could no longer mean anything.

I looked around, stretching slightly as I tugged on a strand of my brightly coloured hair, it had been a rash decision to have to dyed like this, I just wanted a fresh start, I wanted to look like someone else, I wanted to be someone else.

I sighed and pulled on my uniform, well it wasn’t exactly the uniform, just the clothes that I wore for work, tight black jeans and a white ripped blouse teamed up with my heavy steel toed boots.

I swept my hair back into a bun behind my head and sighed, well, I told myself, just another day.

Id been waiting for a moment my whole life, a moment when suddenly I would know who I was, a moment where everything would clear up and fit into place, and…I’m still waiting.

Nathan’s P.O.V

I rubbed a hand over the stubble on my chin and let out a little sigh, shaking my head and deciding that I really couldn’t put it off any longer, I had to shave.

It had been a few weeks since I had last done it, not that it grows fast on my face, and I managed to slice up my chin in the process of shaving.

God, I really did look like I had just stepped out from a horror movie.

No change there then.

I slammed my palm against the temple of my head, telling the voices resting there to SHUT UP as I tugged on yesterday’s jeans and a top which was clean, well the cleanest one within reach anyway.

I would sigh as I caught sight of my face in the mirror then, I just looked so different, the skin spread slightly tighter on my cheekbones from the days I would go without food, my eyes red rimmed and empty looking.

I couldn’t believe this was happening to me over a girl.

No, not just any girl.

Lucy Jepson.

My Lucy.

I moved my hand up, running it through the tangles of my much longer hair; it had been a good few years…..shit had it really been that long…? I shook my head to rouse myself from the alarming thoughts as I picked the scissors up from the side, hardly believing that I was even daring to do this, Lucy would think I was an idiot.

No, no she wouldn’t, Lucy wouldn’t think anything anymore, Lucy was gone and I had to stop thinking like that, thinking of her in the present, it made it so much worse when I realized that I never would be able to show her how good I was a cutting my own hair.

I sighed and looked up at the celieng, muttering the words I knew she would have said if she was able to and thinking of her perfect little smile before I would come crashing back down to reality.

I caught sight of myself again then, the scissors still poised and ready in my hand as I would mumble quietly to myself.

“Well…Better late than never I guess.”

I raised the scissors up to my hair and cut the end of a lock clean away, amazed at how good just a simple action felt to me as I would carry on, smiling all the while.

I would grinned at myself in the mirror when I  was finished, sure it may look a little haphazard in places but I felt more like himself for doing it, and better than I had in a long while.

Well, I guess today was a good a day as any for getting my life back on track.

I ran a hand through my hair again, wincing at how the greasy locks felt before I decided to have a shower, and actually wear the clean clothes I had stored away.

I stripped off again and moved over the hot shower, pressing the button as I would feel the water cascade comfortingly over my body.

And at that moment, I knew, however hard it was without her, she would want my life to go on.