Chapter 1

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"What is this?" Zayn says clencing the train ticket in his fist. "Nothing," I say -wide eyed- biting my lip. "New York?" His voice cracked. I found myself breaking. "Tell me, are you that destined to get away from me?" I thought about it and answered as truthfully as i could at the moment, "Yes..." A tear fell down his cheek, The last couple of months, we had been fighting a lot more than usual. I suppose it was mostly a result to how much we had both been drinking, but that just couldn't be a good excuse. "It's only for a little while," I begged him to know that I would come back. "A little while? Well, 'Mrs.Malik,' I have news for you," he stood up straighter and got in my face, "we're married. You can't just get up and leave for a 'little while.' We're supposed to be in this togther. You're not leaving me." I was agaisnt the wall so running wasn't exactly an option. "I can leave if I want," my voice quivered -trying it's best not to let me cry. "Why would you want to?" Zayn demanded -punching the wall beside my head. "Things like this, Zayn," I said calmly, finally finding the courage to push his arm down. I took the ticket from the ground where he had thrown it, took the bags I had packed from the floor, and headed for the door. "Sarah-" I turned just as a tear streamed down my face. "Goodbye, Zayn." He slid down the wall, into the floor, and hung his head -pretending to fix his hair. I fluttered the tears from my eyes and walked out the door. The entire cab trip to the train station, I played through all our greatest memories through the five years we had been together. I could remember every time he said "I love you" from the very frist time, to just that morning. I closed my eyes and could feel his warm lips on my forhead, just I as I would fall asleep.  Then, all those bad memories flooded back. The sound of glass bottles breaking echoed through my mind. I opened my eyes to the sound of the whistle. Finally, I was at the train station. I was going to New York to stay with my friend Bailey. The only thing I was excited about was seeing all my friends. I'd been so wrapped up in Zayn, that I hadn't seen them in forever. I stepped onto the train and the first thing, a guy chased a girl onto the train, begging her not to leave. Where was Zayn? Maybe leaving him was right. He didn't even come after me. I examined the ring on my left ring finger. What was the use anymore? I closed my eyes tightly and slid it off. I put it in my jewelry box in my messenger bag. I couldn't think of anything but Zayn. All of those good and bad memories, I just wanted them to go away.

Zayn's POV***

I couldn't believe she was gone. Ever since that front door separated our every difference, I couldn't get her out of my head. I stood up, wiping some tears from my eyes, and walked back to our- my room. I remembered how she woke up his morning. Those smiling eyes welcoming me into a kiss, followed by "I love you, Zayn." When I found that ticket, I was torn apart, but anger got the best of me. I couldn't bear to think that I had lost her. I feared the word 'forever' for the first time. Would she be gone forever? She was supposed to be with me forever. I looked at my ring and thought of the day she put it there. I took it off and laid it on the dresser. Did it even mean anything anymore? I laid down on her side of the bed and buried my head in her pillow. I smelled, painfully, so much like her. It took my mind back to the very first time we had laid in that bed. Every move was mimicked in the back of my brain. I know I should have went after her, despite myself. I loved her and I couldn't convince myself that she doubted that. The fear that she would forget it was my problem.

Sarah's POV ***

Five years of being right by his side, or at least in the same building, every second of every day, and now we were so many cities apart. Pulling into the station, I noticed Bailey talking to a guy, waiting for my train to arrive. I stepped off and she finally noticed me. "Hold that thought," she told the guy, "SARAH!" She ran and squeezed me tightly, making me drop my stuff. The newest tattoo on my upper arm stung as she squeezed tighter and tighter. "Look at you! How many tattoos do you have, now? 20?" She laughed. "Just eight," I replied with a shrug. "Oh my gosh! I missed you!" She squeezed me again. I smiled. Maybe being away from him wasn't all that bad. Although, I missed him, maybe I'd get over it. Maybe I wouldn't go back at all. I couldn't find my piece of mind enough to go as far as to say that, yet, but maybe one day. Bailey helped me carry my things to her car and we got in. It was awkwardly quiet for about five minutes of our trip until Bailey finally said, "So, how you been? I mean- I know he-" I looked down at my knees. "He can't be the only thing important to you- could he?" I shook my head, despite my reasoning. He was. Driving through the New York City streets brought back even more good memories. Walking down the side walk, holding his hand, bundled together because we're cold. I loved him, I really, really did. I didn't want to leave, nor was I destined to get away from him. I was just tired of being yelled at all the time. I looked at my arm, examining each tattoo I had. Each had something to do with him, even my first. That's how I met him. Me and Bailey were getting matching ones and he helped us pick out one, I couldn't think about that though. It hurt. We pulled into the parking lot of Bailey's apartment building, the first place Zayn and I... well, yeah. I tried to convince myself to stop thinking about him, but it was no use. Zayn was stuck on my brain.

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