Have Hope

17

Y/N POV

I had no clue what time Alex would come to talk, so I chilled on my phone for a little bit, surfing through Instagram.

I had gained over 5 million followers, and quite a few celebrities and people I look up to follow me, which is really cool.

I was in the middle of looking at some stupid memes when a knock sounded at my door. I did my best to calm my racing heart, knowing who was on the other side.

I set my phone down and walked over to it, unlocking it. As I suspected, Alex Morgan was standing on the other side of it, looking extremely nervous.

"C-can we talk?" She asked, her voice small. I gave her a curt nod and stepped aside, closing the door once she entered.

It was really hard to stay mad at this woman, especially now, since she's here talking to me. But I felt that I had a right to be upset after what had happened.

"Can I sit?" She asked. I nodded again, motioning for her to sit on Kelley's bed. I sat across from her on my own, legs dangling off the side.

"I'm...." She took a deep breath, her gaze in her lap. "I'm really sorry Y/n." The forward looked up and met my eyes. I could see the unshed tears in hers, and, while I would never admit this, in that moment, I forgave her for everything.

"I'm so sorry for-for kissing you...a-and then ignoring you...and...I know I really messed up." The older woman's voice was shaky as she spoke, and all I wanted to do was comfort her. 

"It has taken me a lot of self reflection, and a lot of tough conversations to realize....to realize that I..." The brunette took another deep breath, and I had no clue what she was going to say, but I was on the edge of my seat.

"That I like you. Like...like like you." Alex looked up again, a single tear sliding down her cheek. My eyes slowly widened as my brain caught up with my ears.

"W-what?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper, and not being able to believe it. 

"I like you." She said again, but more firmly this time. 

I had no words. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know how to react. But I also wanted to hear the rest of what she had to say.

"I hate myself for not seeing it sooner, and I'm so sorry for putting you in the position that I did. It wasn't fair of me, but I just felt so scared and confused because...be-because I had never felt that way about a girl. Not until I met you. And it was like...once I realized what it was, suddenly everything made sense to me. How I feel when I'm around you. How I feel when you make me laugh or wink at me during dinner. How I feel when I talk about you with my friends. How whenever I'm with you all I want to do is kiss you and throw my arms around you. I thought I was just missing Servando, and I told myself that lie for five months. But I can't do it anymore. And I won't. I like you Y/n, and I get if you want nothing to do with me after what I did-"

Before I could stop myself, I stood from the bed and pulled Alex up into a kiss. The shorter woman immediately kissed me back, her arms flying around my neck while my hands went to her hips.

I kept it light, not wanting to cross any boundaries, but as soon as our lips touched, that same feeling I had gotten four night's ago when she kissed me erupted inside me. It was like a massive adrenaline rush combined with an explosion of fireworks around me a butterflies in my stomach.

She tasted so good, and I couldn't get enough. But we weren't done talking, so I reluctantly pulled away, my lungs burning. Our breath was heavier than normal, but I couldn't stop the wide smile from breaking out onto my face.

"I like you too Alex." I said, catching my breath. And then the biggest, most beautiful smile I had ever seen appeared on her lips, her blue eyes lighting up. I pulled her in for a hug, sighing with relief.

"We still have a lot to talk about." She said, cuddling into my chest. 

"I know." I murmured, kissing the top of her head.

"I guess we should get it out of the way?" I asked. I felt her nod, so I unwrapped my arms from her and sat back down on the bed. The shorter woman made an adorable pouty expression when I let go of her.

"It's so we don't get distracted." I explained with a chuckle. Alex giggled and sat back down in her previous spot.

"So first question, why did you hate me?" I asked with a smug smile. Alex laughed, rolling her eyes.

"Honestly?" 

I nodded, waiting for her answer.

"Because you waltzed into camp, that annoyingly sexy smirk on your face, and I knew right away you were going to be a problem for me. I hated the way you made me feel because it scared me, but I never actually hated you."

"Mmm." I hummed. "I have that effect on women." I joked, making her swat my arm and roll her eyes once more.

"Alright, second question, what do we do now?" Her tone communicated her uncertainty, and I couldn't blame her for being scared. We were in a difficult position, with her not being out to anyone but the team yet, and being the face of US Soccer.

"Well...we don't have to tell anyone yet. We can keep it a secret and wait until you're ready to tell people. I don't mind waiting for as long as you need to. Um, since this is so new for you- dating girls I mean, and new for me- dating my older teammate, we should go slow. Like, very slow. Take it one step at a time you know?"

She nodded relief washing over her.

"No expectations right now- except that we communicate with each other and be honest about how we are feeling. We don't have to do anything sexual right away either, I don't expect that at all."

"Okay, that...that sounds good to me."

I smiled, tucking a loose strand of hair back behind her ear.

"So what are we then?"

That was a good question, one that I hadn't really thought about. Alex and I haven't been on any dates, but we also knew each other really well, especially considering it's only been five months. Five months of living and breathing and eating together.

"I don't know. What do you want us to be?"

She shrugged, nervously picking at the hem of her shirt.

"Girlfriends?" Her tone was soft, and the bright blush on her cheeks told me how scared she was to say that. Honestly I hadn't been expecting that to happen right away, but what else would we be? Those weird, unlabeled relationships never last anyway, and I'm in this for the long haul with Alex.

"I'd like that."