Breaking Steele (Sarah Steele Legal Thriller)

Chapter 16

SWEAT POURED OFF THE tip of my nose as I pounded the stair climber. Eminem ripped my heart out in my earbuds and I lost myself in the sound. This was my escape, my world to bend and create what I wanted.

I had barely slept, and now I was up and doing my early morning exercise routine. I had a weight problem when I was a kid—I just couldn’t lose the baby fat. Being teased at school led to more eating, and at my highest weight I began to have some medical problems. I also ate when I was stressed, and my home environment was the opposite of stress-free.

I wanted to be healthy, and then that day came …

It still hurt so much, but in a way, my mom going away on a life sentence was the best thing that ever happened to me. I didn’t like to think about it. But when I worked out, in the middle of punishing my body, I let it drive me.

Thinking about my mom made me think about my father. He’d never left me, but he’d never been there for me, either. In the midst of Mom’s craziness, he never stood up for me. That’s why I had done what I did that night. And even though I longed for him, I knew that I was longing more for the idea of someone than the real person.

My mom was gone too, for all intents and purposes. She’s still angry. When I call her, she answers me in monosyllables and then hangs up after a minute. I tried to see her the first year, but she wouldn’t come out of her cell. And it was hard for foster parents to get me there anyway, so I gave up and took to the gym.

One hundred pounds later, I was in the best shape of my life. For the first time, men noticed me, and it took me about a year to figure out how to handle male attention. Most just wanted one thing, and I was not in to one-night stands.

“Just gonna stand there and watch me burn …”

My legs screamed and I pushed harder. The more they hurt, the louder the music, and the easier it was to drown out my thoughts. Was it healthy to try to bury all my feelings? Probably not, but I wasn’t ready to stare that monster in the face.

The song ended and I eased up for a full minute. When my heart rate slowed a little, I cranked up the resistance and hit it as hard and fast as I could.

I thought about Hank Williams and how he was trying to break me. Why? What did he have to gain by pushing me to the edge? Was he really planning to kill me, or was he just scared?

One of the most dangerous things was a man with money and nothing but time on his hands, and Hank Williams had both.