Jangles

Chapter 1: Welcome to Jangles

1. Welcome to Jangles

"I didn't think that you were actually serious!" I shouted out the front door. "Who honeymoons when they're in their forties?"

                Mom sent me the look that never failed to get an eye roll out of me. It was the "don't embarrass me in front of the neighbors" glare. I couldn't help it. My inside voice was naturally loud. She crammed her last carry-on bag into the trunk of Phil's lame car. I didn't know anything about cars models or cars in general, but just the look of it screamed old-fashioned and dorky.  But apparently Mom didn't care about that sort of stuff; otherwise she wouldn't have married him.

                "First off, I'm only thirty-eight, thank you," she retorted, shutting the trunk door. "And Phil and I are still newlyweds, and newlyweds go on honeymoons. And before you ask, you cannot go."

                My jaw dropped in repulsion at even the thought of vacationing with Phil, even if it was a cruise around the Caribbean. "Gross, Mom!" I wasn't even going to suggest that." I shivered and shook my head. "No amount of money could get me to accompany you on your husband." I dropped my volume to a whisper and hissed, "Do you even know what they do on a honeymoon?"

                Her mouth formed an 'o', as did her eyes. She slapped my arm playfully. "Of course I do! How do you think you and Dakota—"

                I plugged my fingers into my ears and began screaming 'lalalala' like the child I was. She crossed her arms, tapped her foot, and waited me to finish my mini "tantrum," as she so nicely put whenever I did that. "I refuse to talk to you about this," I told her.

                She shrugged. "You brought it up. Not me."

                "And I have to stay with Dakota?"

                "You'll have a grand old time." She clapped her hands giddily. "You can bond with him, or whatever you kids call it now."

                "He doesn't want to hang out with me as much as I don't want to hang out with him."

                "Ah, hang out. That's what it's called."

                "Mom! Are you even listening to me?"

                "Of course, honey. It's what I'm here for. I'm here to cater to your every need and desire."

                Now she was mocking me. "He doesn't want to be responsible for his annoying younger sister."

                "It'll be good practice for him for when he gets a child."

                "He doesn't even have a girlfriend. Besides, I didn't know you wanted to be a grandma."

                "Not from you, I don't. So don't be getting any ideas, missy."

                I threw my hands up in defense. "I wasn't!"

                She beamed, satisfied. "Good. He'll be here shortly, probably in an hour or so. I wish I could stay longer, but we have to catch a flight. In the meantime, can I trust you to not wreck the house until he gets here?"

                "I'm not going to throw a house party if that's what you're insinuating."

                "I didn't say anything about a party."

                I gave her a look of skepticism. "Have fun, Mom."

                She ran her fingers through her light chocolate brown hair, newly trimmed, and sighed dreamily. "I will. There's nothing like being on a boat in the middle of the ocean with my hubby!"