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ELEVEN kinda sorta not okay
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It was the day of the funeral, also known as the day after Octavia fainted in the girls bathroom. While her family still couldn't get over the fact that she had fainted, she still can't believe that she let herself do it in the bathroom— of all places! Gross. And her making a big deal out of it was another thing they couldn't get over.
When they had gotten home, Octavia was seconds away from tumbling out of the car onto the road. But she pushed through until they pulled into the driveway— then she tumbled out and ran into her room. She yelled that she was fine and then locked the door so she could have some time to herself, be without hundreds of questions being thrown at her.
She went into her bathroom to take a shower, hoping to wash away everything that had been happening, to do what she had been holding back for over a week now. She cried. She bawled her eyes out. More than she ever had before. She sobbed and even her cheeks hurt from it. Her legs even started to wobble, urging her to sit down, which she did. She took a seat on the shower floor, not even caring about how gross it would be (but she would most likely care later). She pulled her legs up against her chest and hugged her body, letting herself become vulnerable.
Afterwards, she layed in bed for an hour and a half before slowly drifting off to sleep. She didn't wake up to the soft knocks from each member of her family through different periods of the day and night, or the quiet word asking if she was hungry. The food ended up not being a big deal, cause when she woke up she ate nearly four bowls of cereal.
The day that she had to put on the black dress that was hidden in the back of her closet had come quick. It felt way too short for Octavia's liking, she wished she had more time to just sit in her room and stare into a blank wall. But, of course, she went to the funeral, in honor of Hans.
When her and her family arrived, there were small groups of people standing around, waiting for the memorial. Scattered close and distant relatives that Octavia honestly can barely remember the names of. She respectfully said hello to a few adults before her and Lucas separated themselves and stood in silence. Neither of them were in the mood to say anything— that being a first.
As Octavia scanned the groups of people, her eyes landed on a huddle of teenagers— the Ducks. They all looked the saddest she'd ever seen them, which she gets, them having lost someone who was practically their coach for years. She placed a hand on Lucas' upper arm and told him she was gonna be right back. He nodded and headed back to their parents who were caught up in a conversation with relatives.
Octavia walked towards the teenagers, and ended up catching the eyes of Julie and Connie. Both girls practically sprinted over and swallowed her into a much needed hug. Sure, Shelly and Jenny were there for her and gave her everything she needed, but it was nice to have someone who was feeling the same way. Both girls lost someone too, even if they didn't have a relationship the same way, it was a relationship nonetheless.
