NOW YOU SEE ME.

Chapter 41.

Silence. That's all there is and was throughout my trip back home.

My heart has been broken and hurt before but at this moment , having to break up with the boy I love, then leaving and ending my adventure like it meant nothing when it did, no words can describe the emotional state I'm in.

As much as I'm hurting and all, and throughout all of this, no matter how much I'm hurt by my moms actions, some of what she's said is right. Yes, travelling and falling in love was something new and exciting, but I also have to put her first, the adventure was bound to come to an end soon, though I didn't expect it to turn out the way it did.

Caleb's return or shall I say visit is one of the major factors and parts, of my adventure turning sour, I've known that one day I'd bump into all those who've messed my life but not so soon. You know, when your life has been a rollercoaster ride, you tend to just accept it and place it as a normality. My mom was right, I was doing so well and even though I'm hurting right now, deep down I still want to get back in that form of line, where I was on my way to that end of the tunnel.

Things were in progress and looking up, there was a slight glimmer of hope, I'd found my footing and was just recognising my voice, I had plans and actually wanted more for myself, not to be stuck in a box within my mind. So I want to work towards that, being where I was before all of this happened, though Connor added so much to my improvements, he challenged me, broke my walls and let me be vulnerable and in return, he gave me love, hope and a sense of belonging.

Oh Lord how can I just forget it, how can I switch off everything and pretend as if all of this meant nothing, or never happened. That's the problem, I can't.

My mom and I , well mostly my mom and Doctor Anthon decided that it would be best if I returned home, and not back to the home. I'm a bit relieved by that since I was not up to going back there, just thinking of all that's happened and the constant memories haunting me , I'd never survive.

So that's why right now, I'm sitting on my window seat, staring at the window, not even unpacked and just being lost in thought. My mom and I haven't exactly spoken and I'm kinda glad about that because I have no words and nothing to say to her, I'm still upset but guilty at the same time for making her worry, upset and having her witness yet again, another moment of me being in hospital.

I hear her enter behind me but don't look at her, I'm quite sure her eyes are on me and she's contemplating on whether to start a conversation or leave me be. I then hear her sigh, indicating that she's at a loss for words, not knowing where to start and I'm glad , because nothing at this point she says will make up for her actions.

Movement on my bed and I already know that she's sitting on it, thinking that with she being here and us in silence will make me crack, but nope, nothing happens except for me ,who moves away from the window, walks over to my bag and starts unpacking.

" Bailey, you have to talk to me at some point." She sighs, seeming somewhat defeated.

I don't say anything ,only continue with my unpacking.

"I know what you must be thinking and feeling." All I do is glance at her, making her stop mid sentence before I get back to unpacking.

Another heavy sigh and this time, she gets off the bed and walks over to the door.

Looking up, I see her looking at me, defeat evident on her face. " I may seem like a bad person now but in time you'll understand." She walks out , leaving me to my once again silent room.

Having had enough of unpacking, I sit on my bed, looking at my window and just letting the silence consume me.

Later during the night, tears stream down my face, I'm sitting on the floor against my bed ,in the dark.